I stumbled across a dream last night, or at least that’s what I believe it was
I seem to be having trouble deciphering whether it was a dream or possible an incomplete fantasy
Cause I seem to be awake, so I poked myself with a stick so I could feel the pain, I felt it so that must mean that I’m semiconscious
Or maybe reality is subconsciously catching up to me, so I jumped in shower to wash the Sin away, then my animalistic Desire came into play, whispering nothing to me but that naught language
As my thought started to Unravel, I hopped out the shower because as cold as the water was the my real intentions seem to add fuel to the fire, and as the Steam starts to fill up the room, this all had seem to Excite me, it was quite the Delicious Poison
Metaphorically speaking
Instantly I knew wrong was wrong, but wrong never felt so good, yes was yes and no wasn’t even in my vocabulary,
Temptation surrounded my system , but my logical thinking stood in Tact, as I put pen to paper an intriguing presences captivated my attention intensifying this situation,
So I inquisitively and roughly took the music out my ear to stop the Teactresses because I realized that temptation was sitting next to me the whole time
So you tell me is this something I should take lightly, because it seems hard as hell to carry.
Either way the thought of it is still hard to Admit.
-Passion_Unique
Apr 23, 2015
Apr 23, 2015 at 2:01 PM UTC
Behind closed doors
There was a time when a man like him didn’t speak to a women like her, but I guess you could compare it to a point of time in history where men and women knew how to stay faithful to one another, without all the complications of another man kissing on his wife and her EXCUSE would be that her husband was never there for her emotionally
Or when a women was left at her bed side because she had just found out the man she once LOVED was having an affair with one of her closes friends, which now pregnant with their THIRD child , praying that when she found out about the other women , that he would tell her that’s all she is “the other women”,
So now they are left with the choice to talk it out for the sake of the 4 kids they share or she leave him where she first found him, in the closet with his drink in one hand, a pack of “ Smokes” in the other, and the excuse he would use was that she didn’t love him enough, or she was too busy being self-centered, even though she maintained the cooking and cleaning, taking care of their kids while also maintaining two jobs because her husband could not even keep one,
Well now they are both left in the middle of the living room just staring at each other hoping one of them will break the silence because silence kills, hoping one or the other will explain their actions , because I mean that’s what its all about they want at the end of the day right Hope, a prayer that It can be fixed,
It seems to never happen, because what they don’t realize is they are both fighting for the same thing, a question only boundaries can clarify, so the both of them just continue to stand in the middle of the room unable to see the objective of their subjective issues, they are so busy fighting in their minds that they can’t even start to constipate on the idea of going back to what a real marriage is back to when there was such thing as COMMUNCATION ,
She moves her foot hoping he moves his lips and words come spilling out, he blinks his eyes praying she makes the first move because he doesn’t know what to say to her , he cries silently inside as she yells outside her head but inside her intentions grow because she wants him to hear her point and he knows she speaking clear enough,
So now what they have reduced themselves to this silent war the both them afraid to take Physical Action, so the take turns walking away silently careful not to take a step to loud that would force one or the other to turn around , so they turn away from each other, to sleep in different beds since that’s seems to be the only thing they can agree on for tonight.
LOVE what does that feeling mean anymore the one verb people tend to overlooked, symbolically it used to mean UNBREAKABLE , a word that now has no meaning its thrown around like a TOY in the need of batteries
A BOND between the ones daring to show affection ,but now it’s just an action that everyone is to scare to show rightly anymore, nonsense is the correct term, so now we are face to face with the big lime green elephant in the room running away like its being chanced around by mouse careful not to get it stuck in its trunk, starting new issues to avoid the current ones, enjoying pleasant conversations in front of people, because we all know if really think about it the picture you paint in front of people is what they will always assume happens Behind Closed Doors.
-Passion_Unique
Apr 23, 2015
Apr 23, 2015 at 1:57 PM UTC
Today I suffered a lost, this pain seems unbearable it feels as if my heart has suddenly just suddenly be misplaced, a case Amnesia is what I guess he wanted me to feel ,what he thought that I would just wake the next day and memory would just be lost, he just left as I stared over his sprit praying that he would come back, I yelled screamed and everything in between but nothing no words or motion just silence is what I felt
How about a warning next time , now I’m stuck ******* in the pain inside trying to avoid embarrassed I’m starting feel , no remorse or hint of sympathy just shame and deprived
Can you see these wet things falling or my cheeks ,I know I can because their at the tips of my fingers one for every word, motion writings that now seems like lies to me how could you just take him from me I thought we had an understanding, a deal is what I say I do good as long you keep him close to me.
No explanation, just a **** and he’s just gone, gone with the wind, expect even wind doesn’t move as fast as he did
I know I come off kind of fragile at the moment, but it’s because I’ve never faced something like this before
Something I’m unable to explain or reasoning with, now all that’s left is a warm body with cold heart
Now I bet you assume I was talking about death or even a bad break up
but at least if it was death there would be a cause and effect, if it was a bad break up I could be reasonable and deal with ,it could all be explain, there would be a reason for but what happen
what I am experiencing is much more worse, he just walked away, just like that he was out of my life like I said he could of at least giving me a warning I received no signals nor signs or maybe he did and I just mistook them for them empty threats
Words with no meaning is what I called them, because I stated facts when he was just trying to give me his opinion
If I took him more seriously I would have realized that he was suffering burning in pain things I tell myself now could I have stopped the disease that was controlling him
What if, and’s but’s, is all I think about now?
What if I would stop what I was doing to hear him?
Would he have stayed? Maybe if I stopped worrying about my life, I could have taken his pain away?
Not a day goes by that I’m not thinking of him, hoping he is off happy , safe & filled with excitement
Today I lost a friend the part of my soul that I can’t seem to forget, I get this burning sensation at the core my heart whenever the situation comes to mind, cause he’s not the only person with sadness inside
What if I called him and he picked up what’s the first thing I say, perhaps Sorry!!!! Maybe an apology is in need
What if I said Hi would even bother to have a talk with me?
-PASSION_UNIQUE
Apr 23, 2015
Apr 23, 2015 at 1:50 PM UTC