onetwothree
American
The fire in the pit of her belly tells a different story. From the mounds in her throat to the tears pressing against her eyes, something is not as it seems. She'll snatch out your heart and drink it till dawn. She is not one of those girls that goes quietly into the night.
Love flew in
Yesterday
At half-mast
Today it is
Blooming—
My heart
At its mercy
Tomorrow love
Calls me cooing
And it is as if
I never existed
Before this.
Apr 21, 2014
Apr 21, 2014 at 6:06 PM UTC
Trace my limbs into yours
Cast your shadow ablaze
This love is fire—it’s burning us down
Through the years
Through the months
Through the days.
Mar 4, 2014
Mar 4, 2014 at 12:44 PM UTC
I’m a rag doll for you
I walk
In sweet little steps
Enigmatic, pink-cheeked
I never hiss.
My lips are gouged
My hair is charred
My eyes are black dots
Dripping off into the distance
I am saccharine.
Little globules of glucose
With bleeding red hearts in them.
I see you with
my black button eyes
And I think to myself,
What a man!
You with your crisp black hair
Molten, congealed, the aftermath.
Who are you?
What do you want with me?
Will you be a kind puppeteer?
A gentle master
Adorned in red and gold?
Or will I fight my way through to you?
Ripping and tearing and gnashing
Breaking your bones,
Tearing your limbs like lollipops.
Will you **** me
In the cool black night?
Will you bend me over
And clutch my throat?
Will you leave scratches?
Will you *** when you hear me scream?
Who will we be together?
Where will we go?
Will we fade into each other
Like dusk? Black melting into
thick paste blue.
Will we meet again?
Will you lie to me?
Will you love me?
Can I forgive you?
Puppeteer, how will this end?
How dark will it go?
How light will we be?
What if I love you
Some day?
Will you cut my strings?
Take off my posy-pink dress
And untie my ringlets.
Will you love me?
Will we ever know each other
In a way beyond these strings?
For I, I am a lively doll inside
I cackle and squeal.
I lick my lips like a night-time girl.
I am different than you think,
I swear I am.
Feb 24, 2014
Feb 24, 2014 at 2:27 PM UTC
I am the poison
And you are the antidote
We lay together
With two big X’s
Across our chest.
I hold your hand
And you hold mine
And we sit in silence
Listening to each other
Breathe.
Pressing on, I gasp,
I thrash, the taste taking effect
I’m gulping, I’m drowning
Why won’t you help me?
Don’t you hear me?
Only you are gone
And I am here
With a tidy X
Across my chest.
You were supposed to
Climb deep inside me
And rip my black heart out
And hold it in your hands
So tenderly.
That the ash
Began to heal itself.
And what once was dead
Would come to life.
I sobbed so hard
I could barely breath
Because you were
The only one.
You could have
saved me.
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 2:46 PM UTC
In my bell-shaped heart
There is a question mark
I don’t know what it’s trying to tell me
But I know I am not listening.
In that heart,
There are scratches across steel
Glass shattered from mirrors
Something mewling
Who will lose
Their sanity in this place?
Not I, says one
Not I, says another
Too late, I respond
Maniacal laughter
Streaming down my cheeks
A thousand voices
Each of them mine.
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 2:30 PM UTC
I stand beneath a cosmic sky
Looking out in a deep blue future with you
I wait, with baited breath, for the splendor
To melt away, to dissolve like sugar:
Crystals going from starry white to
**** utterly invisible
I grandly proclaim that I love your soul
That you were meant for me!
But how do I claim to know?
Me, who was never lucky in love,
How could I claim to know such a thing?
Yet, I do know this: that your soul and mine
Were connected in some other time,
In some other world, a place or a cosmos before
I hope we will be connected after,
When things change and time melts away
And the blackness engulfs us both
I hope to always be with you.
Even if it’s just your particles and my particles
Stirring in the dense, dark skies beside each other.
Even if we both turn to piles of dirt right on top
Of one another. I hope that our love creates something
Thick and heavy that cannot simply dissolve.
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 2:29 PM UTC
I’ve built a home in my heart named Us.
Inside those walls stand you and me
Squeezing each other’s hand three times steady
Our own secret I love you
The walls are vast and sturdy
They’ve taken us years to build
One room opens to a next and a next
An intricate maze that we’ve built together
With twists and turns that can only be
Maneuvered together as two with
Your mind and mine as an interlocking key
There is a hot stove and a warm bed
A fireplace burning inside both our souls
There are kids like wildflowers
Growing all around us
Two chairs facing inward
Love written on every surface
In every room bits of us shine forth
Computers in the study with that
Beautiful chaos of video games blaring
Bookshelves in the living room teeming
With my psychology mind
There is music buzzing through the air
An electric piano and a ukulele
Your singing a soundtrack to our
Mornings and nights
Our own little studio
Colors in acrylic on paper
Murals on the wall
Red like our hearts
Our blood pumping swiftly in unison
Green like the garden of love
Our children will grow in
Yellow like your smile
A brilliant sun that warms me
That has me looking up up up.
Oct 30, 2013
Oct 30, 2013 at 1:28 PM UTC
My lover never spied on me
Because my lover never cared
My lover never loved me fully
But my lover was always there
He filled some hole inside me
But only part the way
My lover was an excellent distraction
To keep my real fears at bay
My lover is a kind soul,
A man with good for miles
My lover never knew me though
He only saw the smiles
My lover lives without me
And for that my heart is low
I didn’t really want him to stay
But I didn’t want him to go
So from this fact I see one thing
A thing I’d rather not be
I was simply a void to him
And he a void to me.
Oct 30, 2013
Oct 30, 2013 at 2:07 AM UTC
Fragments
I am zip-lined in fragments
Hallucinatory
Un-full
Quixotic
Unredeemed
I bite
My
Tongue
And my
Thoughts
E
X
P
L
O
D
E
Like fire crackers
Whacking and zipping
In that dense blue sky
Heavy with my thoughts,
Your feelings,
Heavy with the world’s conscience
But projecting out that
Blue light
Like some kind of
Innocent
Inner
Inside it
I drive a nail into my heart
Slipping
Dropping
My brains all over the place.
Soul shattering in shards across
The quiet grass.
I make noise
I’ve made noise
We’ve all made
Too much
******* noise.
Oct 30, 2013
Oct 30, 2013 at 2:04 AM UTC
My heart is wrapped up in gummy wires,
Splayed on the ground like an ugly wound
It is frantic scream, a doe bleeding out
It’s not soft and it’s not easy and it doesn’t
Open up like flowers to the sun
It is dark castle, with secrets planted in
Walls and a torture chamber that calls out
“I promise I’ll hurt you so good”
my heart is not petite and pink-lipped,
it is not coy and delicate, wrapped up
in a beautiful box with a bow on top
my heart has scars
my heart is ragged and filthy
my heart is tired
my heart lies to me
my heart is not easy and refreshing
like a fairytale daydream
my heart is ******
and any poetry in her
is the ugly kind that spawns
like grass through the cracks
of the concrete.
My heart has a warning sign
“do not enter.”
It has a trap door you may fall through
It has electric wires sitting near bathtubs:
My heart will shock you.
But as ugly as she is
She keeps on pumping
Red blood like ******
Shoot up with love
And she’ll lay down her armor
And her scars will kiss yours
And turn them from black
To red to a fertile, nubile green
Oct 30, 2013
Oct 30, 2013 at 1:58 AM UTC