Once again,
I got to fool myself.
Emotions are not to be trusted
I grieve before I
mechanically do
whatever they want me to.
Once in a while i stop, feel it,
Act upon it,
then realize how badly
I deluded myself
How does someone internalize
other people to such an extent?
There is no I,
but only you and us.
I am aware but not powerful enough;
It seems breaking the pattern is difficult
and instead
I break my own heart.
Nov 9, 2024
Nov 9, 2024 at 4:16 AM UTC
I am convinced.
You are the love of my life.
Why couldn’t I
be the love of yours too?
He is convinced.
I am the love of his life.
Why couldn’t he
be the love of mine?
You were convinced.
She was the love of your life.
Why couldn’t you
be the love of hers?
No reciprocation,
yet
You are still the love of my life
I am still the love of his
She is still the love of yours.
Oct 30, 2024
Oct 30, 2024 at 8:56 AM UTC
a nightmare you might call it
eyes popping
tounges clicking
a romance you may call it
tears burning
hearts tearing
eyes locking
warped pictures, distorted bodies, remembering the cards
in whatever order
the lovers came alive, death followed closely,
who are you
who am i?
separated by time
but united by the fool
Oct 26, 2024
Oct 26, 2024 at 7:28 PM UTC
if i at any moment should pass on
as we all must
i want everyone to know
i have made peace with life
and so, i have made peace with death.
so don’t mourn
i am at peace now, and so
i will be at peace then
Oct 8, 2024
Oct 8, 2024 at 5:52 PM UTC
my beloved,
what do i do
if i never see you again?
what if
words exchanged
were the last ones
to be so?
what if i
were
never
able
to let go
what if i
have to
keep on
turning
in my grave
Oct 7, 2024
Oct 7, 2024 at 5:05 PM UTC
The child cried, tranquility, where are you?
I’m yearning for more
There is no chaos, only order
but then, where is your door?
The door to the eternity
Where there’s neither right or wrong,
the place in which only the nothingness
hums its content song
The door to the emptiness, which people so greatly fear
Just because the emptiness is neither a place
Nor anywhere near here
The door that people hid inside the labyrinth of constant horror
Sooner or later, they all will find it
or it finds them,
Leaving behind
Burning traces of sorrow
Their minds fear it
keeps their body awake
But the labyrinth of constant horror
is just a labyrinth
And the door is just another door
So sleep, or lie awake
until you can’t
Anymore
Sep 23, 2024
Sep 23, 2024 at 5:14 AM UTC
I hope these are the words that doesn’t fade,
I hope we’re building a mountain
and not yet another wave.
I hope the day
we see our reality collapse,
we can stand there and say
at least,
we made made a promise
out of a perhaps.
I hope our roots are intertwined,
not our branches or our leaves
They are, unless the future lied,
I hope the depths care for our seed.
I wish our mountain would grow
mainly from tears of joy
and rarely from tears of sorrow
I hope your smile never feel constrained
I wish your rivers would sparkle
without any glimpse of pain.
And, oh, I wish life would never invade
and I wish that nighttime never
darkened the following day
I guess you can say
I hope nothing lasts forever,
though only in certain ways.
But of course, I know
nothing makes a mountain grow
like darkness, like storms
Like rain.
May 25, 2023
May 25, 2023 at 1:46 PM UTC
My dear Kitty Cat,
You look lost, Kitty Cat.
Did you lose yourself
in the declining cry for help
Did solely tears
accompany your sleep
In the darkest,
emptiest of streets
You must be tired, Kitty Cat
I wish for you
to find your way home
I know you have had to be
unfairly strong
The ocean is heavy,
and swimming aches
Throughout each and every bone
I know, for I see it
in the depth of your eyes
I feel the ocean storming within
I know you've had to lock it all in
Everything you’ve felt,
and everything you’ve been
But I promise, Kitty cat
I love you still
Kitty Cat, Kitty Cat
I know you rarely name storms
But nameless things
have the worst kind of thorns
In some other world I’d tuck you in,
safely lock you forever inside
But breathing is not optional,
and you need your breath
As well as I need mine.
Kitty Cat, Kitty Cat
The ocean is big,
And I know you, too,
sometimes feel small
But if you float with the waves,
They may not be
so spiteful after all
Kitty Cat, my love
I fear I’m soaking wet as well
Otherwise I would dry you right away
But I can swim along forever,
through boiling water
Through both night and day
Mar 16, 2023
Mar 16, 2023 at 7:43 AM UTC
irrational.
how do I explain
I feel I know your thoughts
a promise of pain
a promise that isn't yours.
irrational.
but the feeling remains
I once saw your eyes
you awakened the insane.
irrational.
I'm trying so hard!
trying for you,
trying, trying
trying for myself too.
still irrational.
through my eyes
even the bluest sky seem grey
and though I know they lie
the monster inside
keeps on having
just another thing to say.
Mar 12, 2023
Mar 12, 2023 at 4:01 PM UTC
Pleasure, oh pleasure!
It’s my pleasure to be
Your forgotten treasure
It’s a pleasure to me
It hurts, as it may
But trust me when I say
It’s a pleasure today
Or it will be someday
Pleasure, oh pleasure
Yes, make me bleed
Pleasure, oh pleasure
I’m in such a need
A pleasure is anything,
anything can it be
Dying and crying,
not being able too see
For when it’s dark
and it’s cold
Some people get scared
But darkness’s a pleasure
So it shouldn’t be feared
Pleasure oh pleasure
whatever you be
Pleasure oh pleasure
Please don’t come for me
Apr 11, 2020
Apr 11, 2020 at 10:02 AM UTC