Autumn
when love falls apart slowly
and hearts feel so paper thin
thin enough to crumble at any moment
like the autumn leaves
air so crisp
takes your breath away
like the last kiss, the last words
golden skies at dusk
the last chance, the last spark
like a candle burning out
falling slowly
drifting slowly
fading slowly
a w a y
Sep 5, 2015
Sep 5, 2015 at 12:09 AM UTC
I always believed that the only way to find myself
was to push everyone away
Part of me wants to be alone
depending on myself, no one else
that way no one could hurt me
Part of me wants to fall so deeply in love
with my eyes closed, no fears, no doubts
I've come to realize that I'd rather feel real, true love
& all the pain that comes with it
than be alone, isolated
within my walls
because feeling pain is better than feeling nothing at all.
Dec 9, 2014
Dec 9, 2014 at 4:34 PM UTC
A million other choices
but the one that is wrong
is the one I will always choose
because I love playing with fire
I collect the ashes each time I'm burnt
and put them in the hands of my demons
they haunt me every night
Nov 23, 2014
Nov 23, 2014 at 11:38 PM UTC
I want
to go somewhere
that doesn't require
you
to check
and see if anyone is
watching us.
I want
to hold your hand
without you
looking out of the corner
of your eye,
making sure
no one is
throwing us
***** looks.
I want
to look at you
lovingly
without having to worry
about someone
catching on.
So let's escape,
run free,
get away
from this place.
You and I
against
the world.
Nov 11, 2014
Nov 11, 2014 at 5:42 PM UTC
i’ve never had feelings for anyone who could be good for me. i’ve never been interested in someone where a good, healthy relationship could’ve resulted, and maybe that’s why i’m so jaded, because everyone i’ve ever liked has just been a distraction or a house on fire— someone i know i shouldn’t be involved with, but i’ll give myself just a few more days to run around frantically with my hands over my eyes, peaking through the cracks between my fingers, searching for things i know i don’t really need, and then i’ll dash out and run down the driveway and the smog will linger for a little while, and the neighbors will complain, and i’ll sit on the curb with my forehead on my knees, holding nothing but intangible regret. next, i’ll either get over it, or obsessively think about him and the ashes smudged on the inside of my eyelids for longer than my sanity. i’ve never really liked someone and been able to daydream about the real possibility of us turning into something greater; of tire swings and painted mailboxes and overgrown, green lawns. it’s always been pretending and fake hope and melodramatic doom. i think it’s messed up my perception of having feelings for someone, because i can never take it seriously— either i know he’s not right for me, or i know the circumstances prohibit the possibility of us. it makes me never want to give anyone a chance (i can’t even see anyone worth chance-giving) because i know how it ends. i don’t like having this closed off heart so early on; i’m too young to be this bitter.
Nov 3, 2014
Nov 3, 2014 at 5:12 PM UTC
Shhh....
quietly.
Our bodies have missed each other.
Let's let them catch up
uninterrupted.
Oct 26, 2014
Oct 26, 2014 at 11:11 PM UTC
I am not as weak as I once was
but nothing could make me strong enough to ignore you
No one had ever looked at me the way you did
and I'd give anything to stare into those eyes again
I remember (how could I forget)
Your words that made me feel on top of the world and
Your words that made me fall to rock bottom
You say I have a piece of you here
A piece I'll never be satisfied with
I need all of you, here, with me
Oct 24, 2014
Oct 24, 2014 at 1:21 PM UTC
how am I supposed to forget you
if I you're the only thing I see
in everyone I meet
in everything I do
you've taken over
you're not only inside my head
locked away inside my memory
you broke free
now you're everything I see too
Oct 21, 2014
Oct 21, 2014 at 2:12 PM UTC
stop wasting your breathe
I just agree
so I don't have to hear you speak anymore
we are nothing alike
why can't you see the beauty in every day
why can't you expand my mind and encourage me to be different
how am I your daughter?
how do I desire to explore and love and learn
when you desire to live a 'normal' life
I get uneasy when I think about the rest of my life being 'normal'
I want my life to be filled with passion
I want to find new things to fall in love with everyday
You just want to come home after a long day of work
and I have realized that's okay
it's selfish to get angry at you for not understanding me
I'll just keep searching for someone who does
I am so grateful to have a mother who supports me in one way;
financially.
but who am I suppose to tell all my secrets to?
Oct 21, 2014
Oct 21, 2014 at 1:17 AM UTC
I hate you
I hate how you tell me everything I want to hear
to make me reconsider
that things could ever work out
stop saying
"I miss you,
I want my hands on you,
you're gorgeous,
be my girl,"
oh, and the best one
"I don't feel like we are done yet.. but I know it hurts you so I should just let you be."
stop it. just stop. you're just saying that so I'll tell you the opposite
you're hoping I'll tell you to never stop
because you want the upper hand
when did love become a game
Oct 21, 2014
Oct 21, 2014 at 12:26 AM UTC