I said everything was fine
Knowing you'll never be mine.
Still, I smiled and laughed
While I shed tears
You couldn't see.
But I died inside
When I agreed to still be friends.
All I want to do
Is crawl in a hole and die
But instead I'll just lay here and cry.
Dec 3, 2015
Dec 3, 2015 at 5:58 AM UTC
May God forgive me
But death is all I see
In my future
I'm sorry
Aug 21, 2015
Aug 21, 2015 at 4:32 PM UTC
I try to smile
But it's been a while
I try to laugh
But it hurts to try
I look at you
And i almost cry
But you say that it's alright
And suddenly this night
Isn't so unbearable
But then you left me alone
Alone in the dark
I tried to be everything
You wanted but what
You wanted was a **** to call your's
I'm sorry
But that's not me
And I don't know if that's what you see
When you see me
I try to smile
But it's been so long
And i'm too far gone
Maybe way up high
I'll learn to fly
And I'll finally be happy
Aug 21, 2015
Aug 21, 2015 at 12:58 AM UTC
Is it wrong to be me?
Is your favorite daughter all you see?
You call her day and night
While I sit in a corner and weep
This just isn't right
Why can't I be me?
Why do I have to live in my sister's shadow?
This just isn't right.
Aug 19, 2015
Aug 19, 2015 at 1:48 PM UTC
Dry your eyes
It's over now
I'll show you the way
I'll show you how
Remember all those crazy nights?
I looked at you
But had no clue
That you'd be the one
I was down
I was done
But then you showed me
How to move on
Now I know
That you'll never let go
I won't fall
I won't lose it all
Because I have you.
Aug 19, 2015
Aug 19, 2015 at 1:22 PM UTC
I've spent a lifetime
Trying to be who you wanted me to be
Don't you see?
I'm not like you at all
I can feel my barriers crumbling
Old fears tumbling over themselves
I don't know what to do
Because I'm nothing like you
But you know it now
I don't know how
I can't ever face your piercing stare again
I'm sorry dad...
Aug 9, 2015
Aug 9, 2015 at 8:34 PM UTC
Lies are a beautiful thing.
Like "i love you"
it makes you feel special
but deep down,
you know it's a lie.
i know it's a lie.
but why do you keep telling it?
you lead me on
then shut me down.
i don't know what you want
I used to think you meant it.
i felt protected.
but it was all just worthless lies.
still, lies are a beautiful thing.
they give you hope
and give you faith.
they make you feel loved.
but it's all just worthless lies
i can help it
it makes me wanna cry
why do you do this to me?
i thought i meant something
but it turns out i'm nothing
to
you.
i give you my all
and you give me your lies.
i reach for you
but you just let me fall.
it's all just worthless lies...
you told me everything would be alright
but you
lied.
Jul 26, 2015
Jul 26, 2015 at 11:15 PM UTC
anger blooms
pain blossoms
the urge is there.
what to do?
keep it in,
explode.
let it out,
****** chaos.
what to do?
the beast inside me
grows every day.
Counseling?
doesn't help.
tell someone?
they'll lock me up.
these thoughts i have
must remain secret
to those around me.
fear of the unknown
fear of harming others
that's what keeps the beast at bay.
Jul 25, 2015
Jul 25, 2015 at 10:17 AM UTC
Memories of you and me
what we were
and all we could be
haunt my dreams
and muffle my screams
i don't know what went wrong
you cheated after we'd been together for so long
was i not good enough?
will i ever be?
for anyone?
for me?
May 27, 2015
May 27, 2015 at 10:44 PM UTC
He came like a summer rain,
much needed after a long drought.
He wiped away my tears,
held back my fears,
but I don't think I'm good enough.
He has no idea how I feel.
Not because he's ignorant,
but because I kept him in the dark.
How would I ever heal
if he were to find out
that i'm messed up,
a broken shell of a girl?
I can make jokes and pretend to laugh,
but inside,
I'm a coward.
Too scared to ever make the first step toward happiness.
Like I said though,
he came
like a much needed summer rain
and swept me off my feet.
May 21, 2015
May 21, 2015 at 8:51 PM UTC