marwa - Hello Poetry

I never meant to be mean Despite our differences All I wanted Was to make it right To make you understand the depth of my feelings. You kept on saying and swearing that you weren’t seeing anyone else When the real question I was asking was if I ever had your heart You kept on saying you cared for me When all I wanted was for you to prove it. And I, who always felt the words comforting Found myself struggling with yours, Not understanding all the sentences that kept coming from your mouth Because my entire being was focusing on one simple sentence: He is a liar. You said I don’t have to make any effort from now on But how can you be trusted When you made me hope for so much Yet gave me so little.

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May 6, 2018

May 6, 2018 at 3:45 PM UTC

Consistency

I never meant to be mean Despite our differences All I wanted Was to make it right To make you understand the depth of my feelings. You kept on saying and swearing that you weren’t seeing anyone else When the real question I was asking was if I ever had your heart You kept on saying you cared for me When all I wanted was for you to prove it. And I, who always felt the words comforting Found myself struggling with yours, Not understanding all the sentences that kept coming from your mouth Because my entire being was focusing on one simple sentence: He is a liar. You said I don’t have to make any effort from now on But how can you be trusted When you made me hope for so much Yet gave me so little.

18

You know how I always say that our existence should have a meaning? Not necessary something big, Not necessary something important and life changing But something that will affect others and maybe make their life a little easier. I feel like I am supposed to be the girl who helps boys like you to get over a girl they once loved. I make them forget their lost I make them forget their pain I kiss them, I hug them, I make them feel special even if I know for sure, they are not thinking about me when they kiss me so fiercely they are not thinking about me when they touch me, their mind are a thousand miles from here wishing they had someone else in their arms wishing for their true lovers to come back. And it hurts to think that I will never be the one they crave for I will never be the one they are trying to forget simply because I am easy to get and easy to leave. He touched me in a way you never did, my body liked it and asked for more while my soul was digging its own grave. I am the no “strings attached” kind of girl I kiss them the night only to leave early in the morning while they still dream about their lovers.

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May 6, 2018

May 6, 2018 at 3:38 PM UTC

Easy love

You know how I always say that our existence should have a meaning? Not necessary something big, Not necessary something important and life changing But something that will affect others and maybe make their life a little easier. I feel like I am supposed to be the girl who helps boys like you to get over a girl they once loved. I make them forget their lost I make them forget their pain I kiss them, I hug them, I make them feel special even if I know for sure, they are not thinking about me when they kiss me so fiercely they are not thinking about me when they touch me, their mind are a thousand miles from here wishing they had someone else in their arms wishing for their true lovers to come back. And it hurts to think that I will never be the one they crave for I will never be the one they are trying to forget simply because I am easy to get and easy to leave. He touched me in a way you never did, my body liked it and asked for more while my soul was digging its own grave. I am the no “strings attached” kind of girl I kiss them the night only to leave early in the morning while they still dream about their lovers.

30

I just stood there glancing at him as this little voice in my head kept whispering to me that he wasn’t the one, and will never be For I lost the only person I ever cared for. I just stood there glancing at his lips While he worshiped my kisses Begging for my skin to be against his Craving for my touch I just stood there glancing at his eyes Hoping that someday, they will resemble yours Trying to catch sight of his soul To prove myself he had at least one thing in commun with you I could have simply walked away But instead I stood there waiting for something I couldn’t control waiting for something he couldn’t give me waiting for his love to magically appear No it wasn’t right, Asking for his love when I knew I couldn’t accept it Asking for his love when I didn’t love him Asking for love in the exact same place where I lost yours

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Dec 13, 2017

Dec 13, 2017 at 4:59 PM UTC

Past love

I just stood there glancing at him as this little voice in my head kept whispering to me that he wasn’t the one, and will never be For I lost the only person I ever cared for. I just stood there glancing at his lips While he worshiped my kisses Begging for my skin to be against his Craving for my touch I just stood there glancing at his eyes Hoping that someday, they will resemble yours Trying to catch sight of his soul To prove myself he had at least one thing in commun with you I could have simply walked away But instead I stood there waiting for something I couldn’t control waiting for something he couldn’t give me waiting for his love to magically appear No it wasn’t right, Asking for his love when I knew I couldn’t accept it Asking for his love when I didn’t love him Asking for love in the exact same place where I lost yours

25

Don’t get me started on love, for I can spend hours describing it, I would say things like: Love is a temporary strike of light in the night sky, An unexpected moment of joy drown in an ocean of misery Serendipity. Love is powerful, love is passion But love is rough Love is sadness Love is smoking a cigarette while listening to your favorite music at the moonlight Love is writing his name on every inch of your heart But love is rare, love is precious. And among all things Love is gone.

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Oct 24, 2017

Oct 24, 2017 at 5:51 PM UTC

Love is gone

Don’t get me started on love, for I can spend hours describing it, I would say things like: Love is a temporary strike of light in the night sky, An unexpected moment of joy drown in an ocean of misery Serendipity. Love is powerful, love is passion But love is rough Love is sadness Love is smoking a cigarette while listening to your favorite music at the moonlight Love is writing his name on every inch of your heart But love is rare, love is precious. And among all things Love is gone.

14

My heart chose not to heal It just kept absorbing all the sadness it found around and amplifying it to the extend that It turned little troubles into petrifying nightmares and basic questions into existential issues. My heart kept on dreaming about a world that was far from perfect glamorizing each person embellishing reality fantasizing. My heart was simply not meant for peace And sometimes I am mad at it for it causes me more sadness than I have or can carry within me. But the heart wants what it wants And sometimes, it *****

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Oct 21, 2017

Oct 21, 2017 at 5:35 AM UTC

A piece of my heart is in hell

My heart chose not to heal It just kept absorbing all the sadness it found around and amplifying it to the extend that It turned little troubles into petrifying nightmares and basic questions into existential issues. My heart kept on dreaming about a world that was far from perfect glamorizing each person embellishing reality fantasizing. My heart was simply not meant for peace And sometimes I am mad at it for it causes me more sadness than I have or can carry within me. But the heart wants what it wants And sometimes, it *****

19

I didn’t leave you I didn’t run . Even when every one told me to, I stayed to patch your heart the same way they used to repair broken pottery with golden dust. I didn’t leave you I didn’t run . But I gave you my love and everything I had even when i knew that we were falling apart. And now, I can’t fix you anymore with golden ink or deep kisses And how am I supposed to draw you when I don’t even remember what I used to feel for you. Is it my fault if you left me Or your fault if I left you ? But we will never found out my love Because you left me too soon. Or was it me who did ?

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Oct 14, 2017

Oct 14, 2017 at 6:50 AM UTC

Golden dust

I didn’t leave you I didn’t run . Even when every one told me to, I stayed to patch your heart the same way they used to repair broken pottery with golden dust. I didn’t leave you I didn’t run . But I gave you my love and everything I had even when i knew that we were falling apart. And now, I can’t fix you anymore with golden ink or deep kisses And how am I supposed to draw you when I don’t even remember what I used to feel for you. Is it my fault if you left me Or your fault if I left you ? But we will never found out my love Because you left me too soon. Or was it me who did ?

24

I went on a journey just by myself. I wasn’t desperate for you anymore and my heart was no longer craving for your kisses My soul finally stopped missing yours and this bound connecting us vanished. I picked up those lovely debris you left behind and put them in a jar waiting for the right moment to come the right moment to unite them for another time, a last time. I went on a journey just by myself. leaving my memories of you where they belonged in the dark, hidden so deep even I can’t reach them anymore. I took my diary and started writing about this peaceful person I turned into and this tenderness I found in people I met. I didn’t know where I was going I didn’t know if I was ever coming back But i knew there was nothing left for me back there Only a burned land with desperate souls and collapsing stars. I stood still in the rain and let the sun kiss gently my skin I closed my eyes and heard the wind whispering: “No matter where you end up even if it is in this exact same place where you started, in this barren land both moving through times and remaining unchanged Know you won’t be you anymore Know you will become Those billions laughs you heard and those infinite hugs you gave Know you will be those shooting stars you contemplate And those nostalgic paintings you wrote.” yo , no soy yo; por lo menos no soy el mismo yo interior

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Oct 12, 2017

Oct 12, 2017 at 5:09 AM UTC

Blindfolded

I went on a journey just by myself. I wasn’t desperate for you anymore and my heart was no longer craving for your kisses My soul finally stopped missing yours and this bound connecting us vanished. I picked up those lovely debris you left behind and put them in a jar waiting for the right moment to come the right moment to unite them for another time, a last time. I went on a journey just by myself. leaving my memories of you where they belonged in the dark, hidden so deep even I can’t reach them anymore. I took my diary and started writing about this peaceful person I turned into and this tenderness I found in people I met. I didn’t know where I was going I didn’t know if I was ever coming back But i knew there was nothing left for me back there Only a burned land with desperate souls and collapsing stars. I stood still in the rain and let the sun kiss gently my skin I closed my eyes and heard the wind whispering: “No matter where you end up even if it is in this exact same place where you started, in this barren land both moving through times and remaining unchanged Know you won’t be you anymore Know you will become Those billions laughs you heard and those infinite hugs you gave Know you will be those shooting stars you contemplate And those nostalgic paintings you wrote.” yo , no soy yo; por lo menos no soy el mismo yo interior

39

You don’t know people until you know them, and you know them when you know who they once loved- so intensely its’ stained their soul, so fiercely it caused a hole in the exact same spot that once, was filled with love. You will know when you’ll start, listening to their whispers. Understanding their silence. Trying to fill that void, left by another soul. One thing leading to another, you’ll eventually find yourself right between Scylla and Charybdis. Navigating between your lust to jump into their hurricane, and your desire to go back to that storm of yours. Hoping, their hurricane could cover the sound of your own storm. Fearing, it could cause heavy rains that would wreck your soul. Thunderstorm! Deluge. Blizzard. You’ll know. when you’ll know.

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Oct 11, 2017

Oct 11, 2017 at 6:07 PM UTC

Blizzard

You don’t know people until you know them, and you know them when you know who they once loved- so intensely its’ stained their soul, so fiercely it caused a hole in the exact same spot that once, was filled with love. You will know when you’ll start, listening to their whispers. Understanding their silence. Trying to fill that void, left by another soul. One thing leading to another, you’ll eventually find yourself right between Scylla and Charybdis. Navigating between your lust to jump into their hurricane, and your desire to go back to that storm of yours. Hoping, their hurricane could cover the sound of your own storm. Fearing, it could cause heavy rains that would wreck your soul. Thunderstorm! Deluge. Blizzard. You’ll know. when you’ll know.

26

You never realized how frustrating it was, to be left aside. All those times you deserted me treading me for a fantasy of yours, while you were sitting next to my window. I begged you to take my love but you didn’t want it, you said you didn’t want to own something you weren’t in need of, like an old toy you keep in your closet but never use. I begged you to take my body but you didn’t want it you said you didn’t want to settle for one body when you already had many. You looked up at the sky As if you were searching for something better than me. But even the stars weren’t enough to make this night a little bit less dark, or your life, a lighter burden to bear. You started searching for the moon, in vain. I felt you slipping through my hands so I offered you to take whatever you wanted. whatever you needed. Even my heart. And when you were about to accept, you saw the moonlight entering through my window as I saw my hopes reduced to ashes. And now, I sit next to my window every night, mourning your absence the same way the moon mourns the sun’s. Isn’t it odd to miss something you never owned ?

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Oct 11, 2017

Oct 11, 2017 at 2:56 AM UTC

Moonlight

You never realized how frustrating it was, to be left aside. All those times you deserted me treading me for a fantasy of yours, while you were sitting next to my window. I begged you to take my love but you didn’t want it, you said you didn’t want to own something you weren’t in need of, like an old toy you keep in your closet but never use. I begged you to take my body but you didn’t want it you said you didn’t want to settle for one body when you already had many. You looked up at the sky As if you were searching for something better than me. But even the stars weren’t enough to make this night a little bit less dark, or your life, a lighter burden to bear. You started searching for the moon, in vain. I felt you slipping through my hands so I offered you to take whatever you wanted. whatever you needed. Even my heart. And when you were about to accept, you saw the moonlight entering through my window as I saw my hopes reduced to ashes. And now, I sit next to my window every night, mourning your absence the same way the moon mourns the sun’s. Isn’t it odd to miss something you never owned ?

33

It started raining, as if God heard my prayers and sent some rain to wash away yesterday’s sorrow. But even God’s will and strength weren’t enough to erase this image from my memory. Every time I close my eyes, that’s all I can see. Every time I turn the music off, that’s all I can hear. It’s awaking my demons, releasing them from the dungeon I spent so much time building, fortifying. But they do say you only attract what you are willing to accept, and God knows how desperate for love she was. She is my blood, she is my flesh but there are words that cannot remain unspoken and no matter how much I would like her to know best, she doesn’t. She thinks she has nothing to loose, no one to fear for, but the only person I am afraid for, is herself. She experiences the same demons that shorten my nights, the same voices that ruin my days and I know for sure that ceding your heart to the wrong person will do no good, it only enhances everything, worsening your madness. I know what it is like to loose yourself in a battlefield, to love the wrong man. I know how toxic it can be, how it alters each one of your cells forcing them to ask for more and more turning you into an addict. Making it barely impossible to go back to being by yourself. She is the only one the blame no one’s pushing her into his arms, his ***** repugnant arms. Maybe I care too much about words and art, but he doesn’t seem to master any of those two. He is just a rough soul who never stops to think and create. And they are the worse kind of people, those who never write, paint nor draw. Because I can assure you that you will be his art, his first canvas. And darling, you know how the first drafts and even the following ones are never handled with precaution. They are yelled at, burnt, mishandled thrown away. Art isn’t supposed to be nice, it is messy, dark and usually teared into pieces. So darling, enjoy your time left as a single entity.

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Oct 9, 2017

Oct 9, 2017 at 12:29 PM UTC

You were his art

It started raining, as if God heard my prayers and sent some rain to wash away yesterday’s sorrow. But even God’s will and strength weren’t enough to erase this image from my memory. Every time I close my eyes, that’s all I can see. Every time I turn the music off, that’s all I can hear. It’s awaking my demons, releasing them from the dungeon I spent so much time building, fortifying. But they do say you only attract what you are willing to accept, and God knows how desperate for love she was. She is my blood, she is my flesh but there are words that cannot remain unspoken and no matter how much I would like her to know best, she doesn’t. She thinks she has nothing to loose, no one to fear for, but the only person I am afraid for, is herself. She experiences the same demons that shorten my nights, the same voices that ruin my days and I know for sure that ceding your heart to the wrong person will do no good, it only enhances everything, worsening your madness. I know what it is like to loose yourself in a battlefield, to love the wrong man. I know how toxic it can be, how it alters each one of your cells forcing them to ask for more and more turning you into an addict. Making it barely impossible to go back to being by yourself. She is the only one the blame no one’s pushing her into his arms, his ***** repugnant arms. Maybe I care too much about words and art, but he doesn’t seem to master any of those two. He is just a rough soul who never stops to think and create. And they are the worse kind of people, those who never write, paint nor draw. Because I can assure you that you will be his art, his first canvas. And darling, you know how the first drafts and even the following ones are never handled with precaution. They are yelled at, burnt, mishandled thrown away. Art isn’t supposed to be nice, it is messy, dark and usually teared into pieces. So darling, enjoy your time left as a single entity.

53