Lead me to the darkness where
I will find my nightmare
So I can face it myself
In a battle of the wits
I will throw at it my sticks
The same ones that were thrown at me before.
I will sharpen them on stone,
Made of crystal and of bone,
The same one that has hurt me before.
But
We all know those don’t hurt as much,
As the words too sharp to touch,
That our enemies bestowed upon us.
So, I will think of every hurtful word
Every memory, every holler
Snicker, whisper ever heard.
I will cast it towards the darkness
Hoping it will hit as hard as it once did.
But with my mind and vision blurred
With hatred I once deterred
I will not realize what I have done.
At once, the light inside my soul
The one that shone throughout my struggles
The one that emanated through my bones
At once, it will dim and hardly glow
A cloud of chaos will surround
My body as I try to hear my own sounds
The ones I hurled at the night
At the enemy I thought I was supposed to fight
I will walk throughout the night,
Hoping someone will hear my plight,
I will walk and walk
Until I feel the pain
Of thousands of stones
Of millions of words
Of many sticks thrown at my bones
Until I realize at last,
The nightmare of my past,
The one that haunted my dreams,
That nightmare I was fighting,
I am now that nightmare,
The nightmare is me.
Oct 3, 2015
Oct 3, 2015 at 8:54 PM UTC
Why is it that
Whenever I have what everyone else wants
I still pine for what I had before?
Why is it when someone clearly loves me
I want those who don't anymore?
My heart hurts for every connection I've made
and lost
Every person, seemingly insignificant,
Is never just a person to me.
Everyone I meet, even for a moment
is important because I met them.
I hate how people purposely forget about people
Without letting those people know why
I hate how, to make ourselves feel better,
we push people away, instead of having
a human conversation and finding
light inside someone
that will bring us together.
I wish my brain could let my lips say
what they mean to the first time
Instead of shying away and never telling a soul
So I resort, to pen and paper,
To heal my wounds and spill my soul.
Sep 9, 2015
Sep 9, 2015 at 6:05 PM UTC
Lights,camera....
Watching people
People watching
Letting them pass
instead of acknowledging our connection
there's Timothy, we're in the same class ,
he doesn't know, but I think it's adorable
that he always forgets his calculator and asks for mine.
there's Lianne, we went to high school together, but now
we pretend we've never met,
turning our heads at the just the right angle,
so our eyes won't ever pass by each other, god forbid.
Clean slate, this college is.
Lights, camera...yet no action.
Here's Ronda. I want to tell her how beautiful she is
So she believes in herself.
But I just sit here.
People watching.
College campuses have a knack
of giving us windows to stare out of,
but no doors to lead us where we want to go.
May 16, 2013
May 16, 2013 at 9:30 PM UTC
beats.
bass.
bass beats.
bass beat bass beat.
the bass beats along with my heart.
the beat baselining my emotions.
the bass beats my body against yours.
the bass beats me.
unrelenting
my emotions run wild
Am I in a club dancing to beats
or dancing while the club beats me?
beats. beats. beats me.
hypnotized by beats and bass
mind and body control
out of my own control
beat bass beat bass.
bass beat. beat. beat.
its beating me.
Mar 4, 2013
Mar 4, 2013 at 12:37 PM UTC
You stare up at me, looking for answers.
But little do you know,
I am holding on to my insecurities for dear life.
My grey complexion is trying so hard
to cover up the truths I cannot swallow.
I am angry, sad, hopeful, in love, but
clouds can't have emotions right?
well
what do you think rain is for?
I stare back down at you because you
don't realize how similar we are.
But I'm just water vapor in the sky...
Well you're just a carbon-based life form.
Mar 2, 2013
Mar 2, 2013 at 10:04 PM UTC
The heart and the brain are at war
The beat goes to the synapses and makes them snap
The rubber band on the makeshift guitar
Plays a melody only the fingers understand.
The lips blow bubbles into the sky
Hoping they turn into balloons that cannot pop.
The candy store closes 3 hours too early
Because customers don’t want rotten teeth
But rotten hearts come from lack of childhood dreams
The apple core is thrown an inch from the wastebasket
The flies won’t devour it,
Because why consume what has already been consumed?
The consumers shop at flashy malls hoping to validate their originalities
With cookie cutter brand names.
The housewife in the kitchen bakes cookies without chips
Because chocolate can only appear when happiness is readily available
Her brain and heart at war, not over emotion, but rather out of obligation
Dec 17, 2012
Dec 17, 2012 at 1:46 AM UTC
Just Wait
Time will tell when
William Tell will attempt to shoot an arrow
through your heart.
If he misses,
you are doomed
to a life of solitude and faithless trysts
trust is a hit-or-miss.
If it pierces through,
you are condemned to a life attached
like a leech to
some being whose
too tight embraces
take your breath away.
Wait….just…
Listen.
The wind is blowing
sweeping you
off your feet.
You’re head-over-heals
in over your head
falling into a pit of
broken promises.
Only to rake them up again.
Just
Realizations that
****** should
be punished
even if it’s metaphorical.
For hearts can die
and are just as hard
to resurrect
as burning stakes
which were once *****
Wait…
all hope is not lost
for loss cannot be
everlasting
unless…
Will’s arrow was
tipped with
poison
that which makes
all mortals quell.
But one can never know
in certainty
until that day
occurs
Just witness….
til then
dear friend
my sustainer of life
I’ll feed you elixirs to save you
from bleeding
out your memories.
For sewing you up,
is merely temporary
I’ll force-feed you
vitamin D until you
agree to be blissful again
and I’ll be able to tell when
your generic smile dresses your
sorrows in brighter colors
Justice wades
in deeper waters
but once you reach it
it’s worth all the effort
in the world.
Jun 11, 2012
Jun 11, 2012 at 3:18 PM UTC
i am the piper
cept my pipes are
a bit rusty
out of tune
melancholy
its too late for monthly checkups
but you never seem to mind
but you see the only reason they are
so worn out
is because i sing my melody
as loud and beautiful as I can
every time we do the dance of passion
no, they can't be rusty
because
i've serenaded so many other women before you
that can't be
you,
your melody is sweet, pure, harmonious
but of course, you've only just started
you make me feel like an old man
whose pipes have seen generations
i almost feel bad serenading such a pure heart
but i know what will happen
you will leave me soon
yes, I know from our passion dances that you
love me
but when you find another whose music is sweeter
more pure than my coarseness
i promise
you will love him more
its only a matter of time...
Apr 12, 2012
Apr 12, 2012 at 1:29 PM UTC
i'm standing
nay, protruding
from this crowd of conformants
all lined up like soldiers ready for battle
that they hope won't come
but i'm ready to fight
at least against conformity
my appearance is unlikely for my kind
but, i'm still standing
some of us
like me
have been here for ages
we know the ins and outs
of our habitat
the young ones are always trouble
doesn't take much for them to snap
but, at least i'm still standing.
on a bright sunny day
unexpectedly
our battle begins
all i can hear around me are
screams from devices, snapping limbs,
the tanks have come for us,
i feel the tinge of fear come upon me
but i stand strong
They won't need me, i'm different right?
i hear the screams, they come closer
they
squeeze
all
sound
from my body
"If I fall in a forest, and nobody is around to hear me dying, am I really making noise?"
silence .
i glance around me, i see nothing
except the grass
my friends are lying, suffereing
but i have no limbs to spare
But hey, at least i'm still standing.
Mar 15, 2012
Mar 15, 2012 at 12:54 AM UTC
my, my
what a world we live in
where plastic's worth more than food.
because it makes entertainment,
and we thrive from it.
where screens dictate our lives
absorbing us, our deepest secrets
then displaying them to the world
limiting our emotions
to keystrokes.
and it doesn't matter how big that screen is.
we like em smaller and sleeker
so that not even a second is spent in real conversation.
they say they're sparking creativity?
i say they're sparking narcissm.
they're creating conformity
as if we havent had enough.
my, my
what a revolution
where we witness de-evolution
from ape, to human, to...
selfabsorbed, stressful, sub-human species?
Mar 14, 2012
Mar 14, 2012 at 11:35 PM UTC