My Text
"You seem uninterested in the context of my messages, so I don't feel like anything will be resolved. But I never expected that from you anyways, I'm just wasting my breath. So I'll say what you want to hear: yeah, we're good. I'm good."
My Mind:
The words that I share with you have no meaning when you close your mind and heart off from me. I feel like I am speaking to a god **** wall. I say one thing and your response is completely unrelated. Maybe if I expect nothing I will hurt less. My tears fall in absence of your affection and care. My feelings and thoughts are neglected. Instead of being a living, breathing body with feelings, thoughts, and dreams I should just become numb; a blank sheet of paper that will only have words written on it that you want to hear.
Oct 9, 2018
Oct 9, 2018 at 11:15 PM UTC
I wish I could go back
Back when you loved me too
I wish you did what you did
When we were brand new
I wish I got those messages
Messages that were so sweet
I wish they woke me up
With love that was not discreete
I wish there weren't tears
Tears that make me weak
I wish you'd speak words of comfort
I look for them and seek
I wish I wasn't lost
Lost from what we were
I wish that you would realize
That everything is now a blur
Nov 20, 2017
Nov 20, 2017 at 10:44 PM UTC
How can someone remember how soft the sheets were when they made love?
He is so intoxicating that I can barely recall how we went from the bed to the floor in a matter of seconds.
Oct 30, 2017
Oct 30, 2017 at 10:19 AM UTC
"I saw you standing there in the store, aisle thirteen.
Being indecisive about what cereal you wanted.
Your hair was down, and draped over your shoulders.
You wore that faded, grey t-shirt you got from a thrift store.
Your face was untouched by makeup.
You looked like heaven."
Oct 25, 2017
Oct 25, 2017 at 2:52 PM UTC
I wish he would see me for who I am.
I am a hurricane.
I am a tornado.
I am a thunderstorm.
I am a wildfire.
I am an earthquake.
I am a blizzard.
I am a hailstorm.
I am a tsunami.
I am a cyclone.
I am an avalanche.
I am a natural disaster.
Oct 22, 2017
Oct 22, 2017 at 10:20 PM UTC
I need help finding myself;
The girl I used to be.
She was fearless. She was confident. She was not afraid of the storm.
Because she was the storm.
She is lost somewhere in who I am now.
I swallowed a map so she could find her way back.
Oct 22, 2017
Oct 22, 2017 at 10:13 PM UTC
I look at you and see your soul that lies within.
You have not an object for a soul, but entire seasons.
If an array of objects were compared to the wondrous depths of your soul, they would be put to shame.
I can paint Spring, to show your liveliness.
You are so alive, waking with a new song playing in your head.
I can paint Summer, to show your spirit.
You are adventurous, diving into new waters.
I can paint Autumn, for the love you ignite.
Fire lit to keep warm and celebrate.
Your love is a warm blanket like that of a fire; you feel like home.
I can paint Winter, for the bravery you possess.
Snow coating the ground preserves what lies underneath.
You are not one, but all of the seasons.
Oct 19, 2017
Oct 19, 2017 at 9:58 AM UTC
We laid in the woods,
and I saw trees mimic us
Your hands touched me,
and my clothes fell off
The wind whirled around the trees,
and their leaves floated to the ground
**********
Your kisses showered me,
and I shuddered
The rain came down,
and the trees shook
Teasing
You moved inside me,
We screamed in ecstasy
The trees swayed back and forth,
Thunder boomed with intensity
Finishing
We laid back,
And held each other
The storm grew calm,
And somewhere we heard a tree fall
Satisfying
Oct 19, 2017
Oct 19, 2017 at 9:38 AM UTC
Please sit close and still…
Hold me
I long for your shadow…
Cover me
You are... Or were.. my rock…
Secure me
Be sound and firm…
Guide me
The rise and fall of your appearance…
Elevate me
Casts a storm of destruction…
**** me
Do not drive astray... do not…
Leave me
Do not split away... do not…
Break me
Go. For when I look in the mirror…
Disguise me
Your face…
Remind me
Is reflected in my own...
Oct 19, 2017
Oct 19, 2017 at 9:25 AM UTC
when i say something, do you beam?
do you think about how my brain is so complex?
how thoughts are shooting everywhere? how they are zig-zagging their way from my brain to my heart to my mouth?
do you?
do you look at me in wonder?
do you ever wish to see inside my head? to swim in my thoughts with me?to swim in me?
do you ever just love the words that come from my lips? do you wish you could sit there all night and listen to me speak?
even if it was about something or absolutely nothing at all...
would you?
would you watch my mouth move, and close your eyes so you could focus on
every. single. word.
commmmmming out of my mouth?
how?
how would you look at me? with passion? lust?
the thought of the thought that im thinking.
now that's a thought that i think you do not always think about.
so when?
when will you get tired? never?
because the moment that i stop.
the moment the waterfall of words stops flowing from my mouth creating a lake…river…ocean for your ears, is the moment you should be scared.
silence.
there is no thunderstorm, no lightning, no wind, nothing. silence.
are you scared?
you should be.
the words that do not come out are like a tornado, tsunami, earthquake.
natural disasters of the world all brewing inside the natural disaster that is me.
the kind that is on the news, the one that storm chasers seek the thrill of because if they were too close, they would be done for.
so be thankful that you witness the passionate fire of the inferno inside me.
Oct 18, 2017
Oct 18, 2017 at 11:53 PM UTC