late night loving
skin melted into gold
wrapped within your warmth
no longer will I be cold
open me up
my legs light as paper
thick thumbs across crumpled corners
come, feel my consciousness taper
the moon rises slowly
four green eyes in the dark
all I'd known was ashes dull
'till you, my only spark
Sep 3, 2018
Sep 3, 2018 at 9:35 PM UTC
The sun glows differently this time of year
Strong and fierce, dragging scorching bodies to the cold release of water
I know no other love this strong
Butterfly flickers and seaweed dances in the sunset afterglow
Souls come out to play in that humid haze
A little too early, but too long to wait
Kiss me, hold me before its too late
Sep 3, 2018
Sep 3, 2018 at 9:32 PM UTC
September has come and I can feel the change in my fingertips
You are home again and I am moving slower
Warmth arises when I look at you, maybe its the heat
Or the way every step you take matters.
You look at me as if I hold secrets, as if I am a grand and open sea, undiscovered
And the next moment, like the dreamy memory of a path you once took,
The sound of a drum, the smell of pine wafting
Unchanging, unforgotten
I may know nothing at all,
But there is one thing I am sure of—
My soul aches to be near you, to feel yours sing back softly
I know the seasons change for a reason
The tides push + pull, hearts pulse for years on end
And that you my dear, are as stable, as steady as the earth beneath my aching soles
You lift me up,
You carry me home.
Sep 3, 2018
Sep 3, 2018 at 4:50 PM UTC
I'm wide open,
Standing stark at your front door,
Like a covered peep hole,
I'm not welcome anymore.
I'm wide open,
Your shadow frame cracks the floor,
But it's drifting away from me,
Scaling back the dinosaur.
Now I'm closed,
Alone in a clothing line,
Thrift stores we used to find,
Our vintage passing for time.
Do you suppose,
Roses are thorny vines,
Grapes don't smell like wine,
You were never the nurturing kind.
May 21, 2018
May 21, 2018 at 12:07 AM UTC
Our love’s only remains belong to photographs. But not, printed, or digital,
Photographs in my mind.
See, I never thought once during the holy nights we spent together to take out my phone and capture the beauty of your skin under the moonlight.
Somehow I knew our time was too precious
The pictures in my mind are something of a different kind,
Magical and dazed
All around you I see dull purples and blues, but your silhouette only, a burning red
Before cameras existed and all we had was art to remember each other by, there was no truth. Only the perfect imperfect visions of one another.
I think that’s how I would like to remember you.
Thick paint on a blank canvas, never concrete — no one to say yes or no, to tell me whether or not the beautiful things you whispered to me were true or false
Maybe that’s why I can’t forget you. I can’t look the other way when you're walking by. I only wish that time would slow down so I could pretend we are walking together. You are art to me. I choose to see the beauty in you, when I should be seeing your flaws, your imperfections, pointed out clearly in film.
Because aren’t we all lovers? And aren’t we all poets? To me, breathing is writing, every move we make tells the long and ever-so-dramatic tales of our lives. And doesn’t life imitate art? Do we not read to be aware? Of fictional characters and how all their sighs, and breathes alike spill out like ink onto a page? And we understand them. Humans and art alike. And aren’t we just art? Each and every single one of us?
What I mean to say is I watched feature-length films begin and end with the bat of your eyelashes. A kiss to the back of my hand. Your arm around my waist is an art form in itself.
My mind is a dangerous place. Please, don’t come too close. I may paint you too deeply into my painting, I may love you too much, I may never want to remember you any other way.
Apr 16, 2018
Apr 16, 2018 at 11:28 PM UTC
I.
If I could take my pain, and wrap it up all pretty, like a present under the tree, your name would be on the tag
Your face is a ghost under my fingertips, empty promises laced with the scent of his cologne
But not yours, you, you don’t smell like him, you don’t laugh like him or smile like him and your eyes are empty chambers.
Two blue jail cells, without anyone to stay, see the only eyes I know are brown
The only men I know how to love are
Not you I wish I had words to describe but I don’t and I find it hard because the only comfort I feel lives in a face I haven’t seen in months
II.
My heart is used to being used, but this time feels different
I’m used to silence on the way home, final words lies, but this, it felt
Tired
Aching
Like a worn out song too many times played
Like a book begging to have the pages closed,
III.
I’ve ran out of ways to change.
I cut my hair, started drinking bitter coffee
Just to keep myself alive for the next moment
I feel the change in my skin, my eyes feel older than before
Maybe that’s why your hair is long. Maybe that’s why you stopped wearing glasses. Maybe you couldn’t stand the idea that I once knew your short hair and glasses, maybe I left a scar bigger than you’d like to admit
Because
You left all these scars, and they hurt like hell
And they all look like you running your fingers through my long hair — see I can’t stand the idea that you once knew my hair as long
My fingers tingle when I hear your voice
It makes me want to run away, but move 5 steps too close
The ghost of my past self dances under the skin I have since overgrown
IV.
To the boy who felt nothing like him,
I’m sorry things didn’t work out right
I’m sorry that you couldn’t see the fire in my eyes
You see so many have tried to put me out,
But I’m still burning,
My heart will never grow cold,
I’m just here,
Waiting
Patiently
For the final spark
Mar 10, 2018
Mar 10, 2018 at 10:06 PM UTC
Her dark circles two
In her eyes where
I dove deep
Into
Those black pools
In the center
Of doe eyed
Green
Irises the white cream
Eyes
Attentive
My eyes they studied
Made circles took me
My aura in
Undressed me
Wanted lusted
Sighed her two lips
Parted
Red lush
Almost agony
Time seemed
Sighs became touches of arms
Legs brushing
Dances in
Dim light backlit
From a fire
A flame a
Warmth sound and pure
Nature animal sure
A rushing waterfall a sky of no limits
A mountains tall majesty
A prairie fair spread
Before us
A feast
Of targeted greed need wanton
Abandon together
Just us
And heaven
Envying
Mar 10, 2018
Mar 10, 2018 at 10:00 PM UTC
i am my hands
and all that my gentle hands do
the words they write,
the wheels they steer,
the hands they hold
my palms are a story; i beg you to look deeper
see the cracks in my flesh, because those marks,
they belong to me
i want you to find your way through the dark
by touching only my fingertips
i am my feet
and all the miles they have traveled
the all too hot sand
and the all too cold water
i am bright red toenails
and sandal tanlines
use my footsteps as a guide,
step where I have stepped,
i will never lead you astray
i am my eyes
and all the beauty they witness
two doors to the soul,
creaking as they open,
letting the light shine through me
i belong to every single blink my eyes have fluttered
my own personal camera, they show me the way
please, get lost in my eyes
open my doors
do not be afraid of what’s on the other side
i want you to unwrap me,
unravel me,
understand me
you see, i am the overwhelming desire to be known
underneath what is on the outside,
underneath the layers that keep me together
my body is a home
let me shelter you with it
it is all i’ve ever known
Mar 8, 2018
Mar 8, 2018 at 11:02 PM UTC
loving looked good on you
simple, as easy as the late summer wind
i found myself lost within your lies
I was living my daydream
the winding roads we drove upon
still haunt me now
the winter brought snow and ice
but their stoplights stay steadily changing
your deep brown eyes
are only but a dream, fading in the morning light
everyday I wish to relive those sacred moments with you
I wish I could crawl back inside of the skin I have since shed
my fingertips have long since forgotten you,
but my heart,
she’s been aching ever since
Jan 20, 2018
Jan 20, 2018 at 10:51 PM UTC
I want to tell you
that I can do without you.
But I'd be lying.
Jan 20, 2018
Jan 20, 2018 at 10:39 PM UTC