Blurry blurry graying sky
Weep the tears that I hide
Shelter me in rain and storm
Another day has come and gone
Oh blurry blurry graying sky
Why do you weep? Why do you cry?
Take another day away
Drown me in the sounds you make
Blurry blurry graying sky
I'm afraid it's time for me to die
The gun's already to my head
Don't you see? I'm better off dead
Don't weep for me, oh graying sky
My time has come and gone by
I pull the trigger without a second though
But don't worry it won't be for not
I'll add some color to your mind
So I won't be leaving you behind
Now blurry blurry lilac sky
How the days have gone by
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't worry about a thing
This was for the best
Oct 11, 2016
Oct 11, 2016 at 9:16 AM UTC
I'm losing motivation.
I'm losing sleep over the most trivial of things.
I can't seem to keep my head wrapped around these things I'm suppose to love to do.
I sit and I stare at a screen full of words from another, trying to find the best response but finding nothing that works.
I'm tired, I'm sick of having to write the same god **** thing every day of my life. This ****** romance that I have with you, I tire of it so but I can't escape you everywhere I go.
No matter what words I bold, highlight, underline, or stress, you always come back every single time.
I'm done with it.
These words will be my last.
You killed my creativity and destroyed the imagination of a writer who wanted nothing more than to live her dream.
These stories I imagined, the plot lines I constructed, are crumbling down under a mountain of the same role plays that seem to haunt me.
But none of you care.
This wasn't just for fun.
It was to test my limits and see how far I could run a story until I was sure it was completed.
But you can't make a story off of constant ***
I've tried to. Time and time again but it always gets lost behind a sea of one liner responses.
I'm tired. I'm spent. Another dream gone down the drain.
I don't know if I want to save it. It'll always be the same.
The communities never seem to change.
These people always want the same thing no matter what you say to try to change it.
I want to scream and cry. I feel every option is gone.
That I have no choices left and nothing more to move on to.
I'm holding in my breath.
Holding in every ounce of rage from letting lose upon these idiots I am forced to communicate with.
Art is a bang, or so it's said. The gun is to my head as you pull the trigger.
BANG!
Another artist is dead.
Sep 3, 2016
Sep 3, 2016 at 2:13 AM UTC
Passion of the heart and desire of the mind.
The slow passage of time slowly takes it's toll.
The knolls of the death bells ring aloud and clear.
But they don't seem to reach your ears.
Violent eyes and harsh hands sway.
As the tempered cold outside gives way.
Through the darkened glass the eyes doth see.
A realm of hate and despair shrouded in a blanket of illusion.
Icy waves crash on the shorelines.
Skin trembles as the needles pierce it.
A sorrow filled soul struggles to find salvation.
As they drift off into an illustrious sleep
Dreams of happiness overwhelm the mind.
A want for peace and prosperity.
Gracefully entranced in lies of the weak.
Entangled in a capsule of destruction.
A blazing inferno incinerates all.
Isn't this what you wanted?
Is this the beauty of the world,
That you so greatly wanted to accomplish?
Aug 11, 2016
Aug 11, 2016 at 1:46 AM UTC
Your arms were once a haven
Warm and protective
Wrapped around me even in friendship
But now they hold only anguish and sorrow for my destroyed soul
Jun 3, 2016
Jun 3, 2016 at 1:27 AM UTC
Im fine Im fine
Can't you see?
I'm as fine
As ever fine can be
I'm smiling
I'm laughing
I'm cheerful and free
I'm not dreadful at all
Can't you see?
Don't believe me?
I'll show you it's true
I'll share some of my fineness with you
We'll take a walk
Down by the sea and wood
Still don't believe me?
You honestly should
Why would I lie?
I have nothing to gain
Just believe that I'm fine
Everything will be the same
I won't leave
I promise
I only speak the truth
Maybe one day
You'll believe me too
What's that you say?
I have cracks on my face?
No no
That's not true
My mask is still in place
Mask? What am I saying?
I'm fine, don't you see?
What...? No! Stop! Don't!
Stay away from me!
Just let me be fine!
I promise I'm okay!
Don't tear it off!
Keep my mask in place!
Let me hide behind this guise
For as long as I can
Maybe just maybe
One day you will understand
May 6, 2016
May 6, 2016 at 6:32 PM UTC
"My footsteps silent as I walk this lonely and forgotten path. The sound of the wind my only company for this long and tired walk. Just a little more to go. Just a few steps more. I'm almost at the end. I've made it this far, I can't fail now. I approach the tree line, the exit right before me. A smile brightens up my sorrowfull face. I almost break into a sprint but am suddenly pulled down to my knees before my haven. I feel something gripping at my leg, pulling me back to my start. I put up a fight. I struggle. I'm trying to break free. My voice comes out as a silent scream, echoing through the very depths of my mind. I was so close. So close... As I feel my body dragged away from my destination, I slowly start to give in to the despair that had been chasing, taunting and tormenting me. But as I do, I hear the faint sound of a bell, a soft ringing in the back of my mind. I know not of what it is but it sparked something inside of my fragile mind. I break free from that which tried to pull me back to square one, as I hear the name I gave up whispering through the trees. No. I will not fall back into my despair. A break into a run this time, fleeing from the thing that tried to drag me back. I can feel it continuing to give chase, slithering after me like a serpant ready to strike its prey. I hear the name I no longer hold echoing more, becoming more and more like a scream. The more I run, the more my destination seems to flee from me. I'm screaming again. No. No I will not let you go. My feet seemed to fly as I ran, the sepant of despair right on my heels. I can see it. I see it clearly. The opened arms of my happiness ready to catch me, calling out the true name. My face brightens and I forget about the serpant about to drag me back. I take a leap, a leap towards happiness. A leap towards a better life. And the serpant falls back down to the forest floor, defeated as the joy bringer holds me tightly in their arms. Yet the forest still grows, ready to consume with fiercer foes. But I will be ready to face them weither is be with company, or by my lonesome. Because now I have someone to fight for."
Mar 8, 2016
Mar 8, 2016 at 4:11 AM UTC
No air to breathe
No place to go
The silent one
Looks for a home
No one to listen
No one to see
Just how much
The deaf one can hear
Coolness fills it's lungs
Freezing the air ways
It's suffocating
But nothing more can be done
It's scratching it's clawing
It's biting at the walls
The chain is then pulled back
And it's dragged down further
A blurred perception
A blurred reality
Where the outgoing goes silent
And the listener becomes deaf
You mistook it
So many times
Now it tries to get out
But it's suffocated by lies
Aquantience or Friend
Family or Lover
It fooled them all
Aren't you proud?
It's only until
The mask falls off
That it's lungs finally give out
That you realize just who it was they were killing
Feb 29, 2016
Feb 29, 2016 at 10:08 PM UTC
I have to accept it
It's pointless to bother
You've gone away
In the company of another
We use to be close
I wanted to call you brother
But you ever gave me the chance
And now I start to wonder
If that night really meant something
That night that I cried
Were my tears for nothing
As you sat there ready to fly
Can't you tell this is killing me?
Can't you tell that I miss you?
I don't know what else to say
I don't know what else to do...
So now I sit here
Tempted to say something
But I'm scared to speak my mind
I'm scare you might hate me
I know you can't see this
But I'm missing my best friend
The one who I saved
From a far too early end
I miss our midnight calls
Our deep or silly conversations
I miss your tight hugs
Whenever you came to visit
So why must I endure this?
I just want my best friend back
But you've gone too far away now
You're never coming back...
Jan 28, 2016
Jan 28, 2016 at 11:16 AM UTC
Knock Knock Knock
She rushes for the door
Even though she knows
It's not you at all
Buzz Buzz Buzz
She reaches for the phone
Even though she knows
You're not home
Ring Ring Ring
To the door again she goes
Her heart racing everytime
Even though she knows
Beep Beep Beep
Her phone goes off again
She always wants it to be you
But she knows its not in the end
Days Weeks Months
The time flies by
She waits patiently for you
Though many ask her why
She's waiting for the time
She's waiting for the day
She rushes to the door
To see your smiling face
No matter how long it takes
No matter how long the days
Just please know that
I will always wait
Dec 15, 2015
Dec 15, 2015 at 8:57 PM UTC
Do you know what it's like
To be pushed beyond your limit?
To feel emotionally destroyed
Inside and out?
Have you ever screamed out as you cried
Sitting on the floor?
Voices circling
Inside of your mind?
When was the last time you actually smiled
the last time you actually felt happiness?
It was so long ago you can't remember
But you know you can recall a time.
Throat hurting
Eyes swelling
Stomach turning
Nose running
The tears don't stop
The screaming never halts
The voices don't dwindle
And it's all one person's fault
I'm seeking a savior
But he's so far away
So I try to hold on
And be patient for his sake
But I don't want to live this way
Not anymore
I just want to be happy
I just want to go home
Home to him, where I feel safe
Where I know I won't scream and cry
Home is where the heart is
And this house is a home of lies.
Nov 6, 2015
Nov 6, 2015 at 9:17 PM UTC