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london-blue-b
london-blue-b
17/F somewhere between living or surviving. / somewhere between breathing or dying.
your brown eyes help me see things that my soul cannot grasp and your tan skin helps me soak up the sunlight that my pale skin craves. i have never seen something more beautifully destructive i have never felt something so peaceful. if loving you is sin, tell God not to wait up on me.
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Oct 8, 2019
Oct 8, 2019 at 1:23 PM UTC
336 days
all of the atoms in my body have tried to conjugate different reasons for your absence but all they can come up with are grossly overused analogies and misplaced eulogies i want to go back to the time when we were stealing socks and kissing in movie theaters jumping over fences and scraping elbows but instead i'm laying in my bed tasting salt that drips from my cheeks
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Sep 26, 2019
Sep 26, 2019 at 1:13 PM UTC
i miss you on sundays
what a foolish girl i am crying over the past mourning the future. whispering sweet nothings to men who's names i don't even know.
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Aug 19, 2019
Aug 19, 2019 at 2:04 PM UTC
delicate .
it's like holding the world in your hands and letting it slip from your grasp. like owning the most beautiful, priceless piece of artwork the universe will ever let their eyes get a taste of, and letting it burn in the fire. this is the emptiness they tried to warn us about. it's burning aches in the middle of the night because you can't quite close that wound. it's constant pain that no amount of medicine can fix.
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Aug 19, 2019
Aug 19, 2019 at 2:02 PM UTC
"what's it like to let them get away?"
its been 40 weeks, 286 days, 6847 hours, 412475 minutes, 24748569.. 24748570.. 24748571.. seconds, a whole pregnancy since you decided to vacate this unbalanced soul of mine. a home you said you would never leave; but when the walls caved in and the roof started leaking, when the paint started peeling and the floors started creaking, you grew tired of paying out of pocket expenses to repair a home you no longer felt safe in. so you packed what little you brought, and left with what plenty you had gained. anytime a person enters they soon leave because your ghost still dances in these halls your eyes are the color of the walls your voice seeps in through the window. your scent still lingers here and it has made its home on the furniture. when the sun rises we see silhouettes of your body cascaded across the bed sheets. your soul still lives here, wandering around these rooms kissing the window panes. your body left this house, but you still live here. haunting me.
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Aug 19, 2019
Aug 19, 2019 at 1:53 PM UTC
Letters to you that you'll never read (pt.1)
have you ever wanted something you just can't have? alcohol, **** pills, burning bridges, fast rides, you?. my mom has always said "i'd rather you bring home a black boy rather than another girl", this made me feel almost proud like i could bring you home and they would be less disappointed but; you're still not allowed over, so i'll sneak you out of my window in the morning, and we'll forget until it's time to do it again. "he's only 2 shades darker then her" by now my mother is trying to feel less ashamed but the blood that boils in his skin is no different than mine his mother still drinks her self to the brink of insanity but he says i help him breathe momma oh momma, i can't tell you how many nights i have wanted to scream and beg God to make your eyes contrast things differently but everyday his skin becomes something new for you to agg yourself onto, maybe if we take his skin and put it in the equation, you'll forget that you're smoking your lungs black, momma his hands feel so much like home, when i am with him, that sadness which sits upon my chest cascades out of my body, momma i have never felt more like myself. please forgive me.
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Mar 12, 2019
Mar 12, 2019 at 10:40 AM UTC
interracial
staying awake but wanting to sleep not eating but wanting to eat mind speeding body asleep, repeating, repeating, repeating.
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Mar 6, 2019
Mar 6, 2019 at 9:57 AM UTC
Ecstasy.
i would like to know the girl you melt at the knees for. the one who makes you laugh more than me. the one who’s eyes are brown and not blue. i know all about her trust me i do. she’s nicer than me and more gentle. her legs don’t buckle when you want to take walks. her lips are softer and her knuckles aren’t purple. she’s better at making decisions and your mom actually likes her. when she hears her name her mouth doesn’t taste sour and her ears don’t ring. i know all about the girl who makes you smile. so never tell me it will take years to move on past me. because she didn’t have to work like i did all she had to do was laugh.
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Jan 22, 2019
Jan 22, 2019 at 5:25 PM UTC
replacement
the only good thing that comes out of a bad break up is good poetry. if been sketching my head trying to understand why God uses these hands to write art that curls at the tongue. some days i’m no good at it other i’m left crying over the sink blood dripping from my mouth from biting my tongue trying not to scream the words out of the box springs i hid so deep in my throat. in school they called me chatty cathy you would never see me without a mouthful to say i didn’t know this was bad until i was made to feel that way. i stopped talking the older i got focused on writing and before i knew it my legs were shaking at the words i was molding. my eyes have always been fixated on the brighter colors but these days it’s all grey. your absence has drained me but not these words.
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Jan 22, 2019
Jan 22, 2019 at 5:25 PM UTC
the gift
on most days I'm not even sure if there is a heart living inside of me but then I see blue and green living inside of those irises and it's like I hear you beating on my door but the beating is coming from my ribcages and I can't stay still long enough to kiss the satin touching my shoulders
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Jan 10, 2019
Jan 10, 2019 at 6:32 PM UTC
heartbeat