Three days absent of sleep.
Three days deprived of food.
Three days without direction, function, and moral collection.
Three days spent swallowed whole in the depths of plausible correction.
Oh my sweet, I fear no fate can contain this inevitable fear
buried tightly within my chest.
Concaved isolation,
bitterness consumed the best of me.
72 hours of solitariness.
72 hours of repression.
72 hours of apprehension.
72 hours of loss of consciousness.
Whispers of evergreens
chant to me.
Beige stained sheets become
nothing more than a distant memory.
Three months without you.
Three months desperate for lips,
which once caressed my *******
Three months stripped of scalloped palms, and
crazed for circles traced across my neck.
Three months craving ocean eyes
softly speaking, “we’ll be alright.”
Warm baths filled to the brim
creamy, and delicate skins
while Chopin’s ballad danced in the twilight.
Forever delude us.
Forever spoil us.
Still 13 weeks without you.
13 weeks craving the vibrations of gentle breath,
humming me to sleep, silently sooth me.
13 weeks without fingertips tangling fine locks,
morphing into screams of our names
13 weeks without sideways smiles,
rich and modest, but assertive with simple grins.
13 weeks lusting after charcoal hair nuzzled in my chest,
Alluring arms wrapped around me.
The burden of our romance weighs my mind.
Yet, let us go make our visit, I say
to yellow smoke that lingers on streets and window-panes.
It’s time for indecisions, maybe a hundred visions with
Intoxication to bury us, exhilaration to uncover us.
There will be time to wonder, “Do I dare?
Do I dare fall back into the abyss of my mind?”
There will be time,
‘till voices wake us.
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 9:00 PM UTC
that feeling you get
in the soft rain
the clarity welcomed
by the inhale of each puff of that cigarette
that feeling you get
in the soft rain
the regret shredded
by each inhale of that cigarette
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 2:07 AM UTC
Hello beautiful
It’s been a while
Been too long I must say
We’ve been here before
You and I
And I do not know where this path is going
Maybe just you and I
Just you and I
Maybe it’ll be sweet
Oh so bitter sweet
Maybe it’ll be cold
Oh so dark and cold
But maybe it will be
Just you and I
Tonight
And that’s all
But maybe that's all we need
May 26, 2013
May 26, 2013 at 6:26 AM UTC
Do you ever feel as if you’re standing on the edge of a cliff, with one foot over the edge, waiting for someone to push you?
Or maybe the things you want in your life aren’t really plausible? That they’re just dreams you’ve held onto from the time of infancy? That you’re just clinging to them, because you’re too afraid of joining the world humans have created?
Do you ever feel those you’ve surrounded yourself with don’t really give two ***** about? Whether you live or die, because either they’re too selfish, you’re too selfish, or neither? Maybe you’ve just outgrown the other, but can’t dream of leaving them behind? Maybe you were close at one time, but the years have worn away, and it feels as if a stranger is staring you both in the face?
Do you ever feel as if you see the world as this beautiful, sensual, dream like setting you’ve been blessed with? But then you realize people are the ****** up, cruel reason why the world’s considered cold? Do you ever feel relaxed sitting in a field; watching, observing, and perplexed by the world outside your own? Do you ever realize your own life causes more damage to the world than of use?
Do you ever wonder why millions of particles, of atoms, of molecules molded together to create what is now considered you?
Do you ever feel a sense of dread so heavy, it paralyzes you? Traps you to the bed, holds you down, and smothers you?
Do you ever wonder at all?
Apr 9, 2013
Apr 9, 2013 at 10:31 PM UTC
Suffocating.
That’s it.
My chest is drowning
In something that hasn’t dawned
Upon me yet.
Oh wait, crawl here.
I need to hear that heart beat behind your chest.
Don’t stop yet.
Baby, touch there, yes.
There…
Baby. Wait, I can’t breathe
I’m swallowing these words I need to speak!
Our lungs are filling up with that Black Death
And there’s fluid sealing me up
Spilling me up
Aren’t you there yet?
Come here. Calm down. Relax, and breathe.
Baby, feel me there. Rightthere.
We haven’t got it just yet.
Choking me,
These words are caving down upon my chest
Can’t get it out, I can’t get them out!
No
Baby. Don’t stop. We’re almost there
But not quite yet.
Mar 25, 2013
Mar 25, 2013 at 3:48 AM UTC
Hey Beautiful.
Lets get ****** Maybe do some blow
And discover the wonders down below.
Hey darling,
Lets get high, and soar above the sky
Until our eyes fall down from the rise.
The world’s too black and white, too black and white, too black and white
But there’s too much left to uncover
Hey baby,
Let’s find some dope
Maybe do a little coke
And rest beyond these covers
Feb 15, 2013
Feb 15, 2013 at 8:23 PM UTC
A yearning creeps inside
Subtly
It sits
Patiently waiting
To be the death of me
I want what they have
But I feel what they refuse to see
Envy, green as grass, has slipped over me
Cursed with knowledge,
While blessed with bliss
I watch, craving the connections
They seem to make so easily
Nov 4, 2012
Nov 4, 2012 at 2:43 PM UTC
Take these drugs to ease the pain
Not of your mouth but of your brain
And into the downward spiral I fall
Because what's stopping me?
Nothing. Nothing at all
And I fall and fall
Into the despair that catches me
That fabricates its all
It's only blackness we see
But one more pill one more fill
And those hallucinations could be at a slight spill
Wake up! Wake up!
Can't you hear it calling your name?
Wake up! Wake Up!
Can't you feel it worming into your brain?
Images of gas-chamber mobs
Crawling inside the darkest parts of your sobs
Take these drugs to ease the pain
Not of your mouth but of your brain
"Feel better, feel better," they say
But you can't seem to get those rotten images to go away
Oct 16, 2012
Oct 16, 2012 at 5:03 AM UTC
I keep having this reoccurring dream.
I wake up, it is daylight, but I am under white sheets. Because I am on my side, I role over, and these beautiful big blue eyes are looking down at me.
There's a smile covered with whiskers, and blond ***** hair surrounding his face.
The imperfect teeth say something I cannot quite make out, and then his callused hands reach around my naked body pulling me closer to him. He is sweaty, but smells of rain and mint.
The sun shines through the shades, brightening up the blond hair on his chest, and icing out his baby blue eyes. I am speechless. He smirks.
His hand pulls my mouth up to his. I shyly pull away, and roll to my back. He rolls on top.
The clouds are barely parting outside the window. He looks down at me, his golden hair draping over his face while he rests his weight on the hands that he's place on both sides of me.
He calls me beautiful. I blush. He leans down slowly, and intensely kisses me.
I lift my hands to run through his beautiful hair, as he pulls away, continuing with a trail of small pecks along my sternum.
He stops at my ******* traces them. Traces every inch of my body, touching the scars and the imperfections. He stops when he reaches my wrist. He runs his rough fingers over my tender skin. He does this for a few minutes.
I let him.
Slowly, he returns the gaze back to mine, and those icy wonderments melt my heart. I can see tears fighting their way out, but he would never let me see them. He does his best to show the emotion he is feeling through them.
I took away, too afraid of what connection we might find.
He puts his head down, cupping my sides with his overly large hands. He kisses my stomach, and then quickly pulls me to his head level.
He tells me he loves me. His voice sounds like angels.
I say I know.
His rest his head on my chest, while I tangle my fingers with his soft hair. His whiskers tickle, but I love it.
We stay like this for a while. I know this because I watched the sunlight change through the shades on the window.
Finally, he looks up at me again. Our eyes lock. It seems as if time as stopped and the world has stopped moving. It is as if we pulled away, we both realize that this moment would be gone. This one innocent and beautiful moment, it all would vanish.
He leans down, and kisses me so intimately.
We make love, and right as we are about to ******
I wake up.
The dream is over.
And I am alone.
Mar 22, 2012
Mar 22, 2012 at 5:22 AM UTC
Kinda of sick of feeling this way
Not sure what to do to push this feeling down
Just need your skin
I need your skin!
Farther, farther, ohhhh
Guess I gotta take another sip of that
Whiskey drink
That, that thing
That gets rid of this feeling
Ohhhh! No no no no more teasing me this time
Just get it in, get it done, ohhh rough and tough
Isn’t this enough?
Let’s just get ****** up
And I’m so frustrated with these aches and pains
Baby, baby, let me take another shot of of the whiskey drink
Yaaa, another pill
Another spill
Ohhh
Another sip of that whiskey drink
Ohh, baby baby don’t you wish you could be
Just as pretty as me
Ohhh, baby baby
Where are these words coming from!
Where are these screams coming from!
Ohhh baby baby
Just take another sip of that whiskey drink!
Blurring out the rest of the world around you
Ohhh, baby baby take another sip of that whiskey drink!
One pill
Two pill
Oh **** looks like I’ve taken too many this time
Ohhh baby baby, another sip of that whiskey drink
Ya, that’s me
That ****** delusional mess spilled out on that couch
Rip these clothes off me
You know you can’t stand to see me without my skin
Ohh baby baby
Touch me, up and down, oh, baby baby put your hands on me
No no no no more teasing me this time
Just get it in, get it done
Ohhhh and I need something to push this feeling down!
Something to get these voices out of my head!
Get it in, no no no no more teasing
Rough
Don’t you love it?
Ohhh, and another spill from this ****** mess I’m in
Another ****** wreck from this mess I’m in
Just this skin
Just this skin
And this whiskey drink
Just another, another….
Ohhhh baby baby
And take another sip of that whiskey drink!
Leave me.
Jan 30, 2012
Jan 30, 2012 at 10:50 AM UTC