I screamed at the moon, just sat there and slang miscellaneous profanities its way. I cursed its eerie presence; its predisposition to somehow manage to burn me. It has always held me liable for its slow deterioration. But it is so **** beautiful and poetic that it just shhhh'd me, ever so politely. I used to breathe alongside the night in my sleep, and now I find it strenuous to doze off. I once found solace in the craters of the moon, but I cannot forgive it.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 9:18 PM UTC
I became accustomed to screams and bruises. I got used to the crazed look in my father's eyes and the way his hands would shake, causing his cigarette to fall to the dirt ridden floor. I fell in love with the way he would smile as he reached for the bottle. I didn't understand. I cowered in my room at night as I heard the splitting sounds of bats, shovels, and irons hitting various surfaces and body parts. I listened to Alanis Morisette to drown out the grunts and moans that arrived when the fights ended, and they 'loved' each other again.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 9:11 PM UTC
I'm going to fill my body with soil and snake venom, the way it should be. I'm going to run into the ground as hell's unbreakable grasp ***** me under like a leech. I will go willingly and proud, with a dazzling smirk and thorns around my ankles.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 9:05 PM UTC
I am the tremble in your voice as you let the first tear fall. I am the vacancy in your state when the voices won't leave you be. I am the lurid marks beneath your eyes, formed by sleep deprivation. I am the heavy pant that escapes your lungs when your shirt is drenched in salt. You are the sliver of light that slips through the cracks of my body. You are the ecstasy that I feel while singing songs of you. You are the slight comfort that comes when I drift into slumber. You are the pigment in my tortured eyes. The best parts of me belong to you, but I am the worst part of you. I am still baffled by how I managed to corrupt you, you shouldn't have let me in.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 9:01 PM UTC
What am I? I am just a body made up of various parts. I have eyes, a nose, and a mouth like the majority of us. I have two legs for kicking and two arms for holding. When I take the time to dissect the universe, I realize just how small and irrelevant I am. The tree have a purpose, as does the water. Even the ******* bees have a purpose. Do I have a purpose? If so, what is my purpose? To please others? To love someone with all that I have? Well I don't have a **** thing and everything that crosses my path somehow, metaphorically, turns to dirt. I cannot fulfill my 'purpose'. So, I'll ask once more. What am I? I am a carcass with a heartbeat. In the scheme of the universe, I am completely useless. And that, that means that I am nothing. Nothing at all.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 8:54 PM UTC
Take over my mind and caress my body, make me question what I know. Run your hands through my hair and pull, take my breath away. Wrap your hands around my throat. Let your fingers trace and explore the atlas that is my body. Grasp my hands and hold them above my head, shove me against the wall. Hold me there with your tongue and hips. Bite my lip, kiss my neck with everything you have. Don't stop until I'm begging. Enter my body and make me quiver and shake. I want to feel every inch of your skin on mine. I want you to make me feel something again.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015 at 8:48 PM UTC
*"And the heart is hard to translate"
I rush every sunset in its pit of blood
I hold your absence with my bear hands
As the center of the silence I can give to myself
Some impressions of my thoughts of you
Uncertainties embodied by swords
Are roaming the streets in my place
The mirrors chased me away
They refuse to deepen the light
Refuse the clarity of a day
When I am a simple woman
When you are a simple man
I have to prepare my escape routes
Since your fingers smell of apples
The air is full of chemicals
And I stare at the intoxicating hope
My curses explode in hourglasses
There must be a misunderstanding
why did I promise to myself
my heart,
your hell,
our dance,
the resurrection
of naivety
in this body?
perhaps there is no doubt:
I can only love you
or
I can love only you
and no
yet
but
(shh, oh, my foolish heart!)
Jan 30, 2015
Jan 30, 2015 at 6:19 PM UTC
You weren’t worth the
Hundred dollars it cost to
Keep you in my car.
Princess got poached by the
League of Losers with Pedestrian Ideals.
I’d spit venom in your direction, if
Poison meant anything to you. But
Akin to most things, so sub-human,
You miss the world moving around your
Ever pulsating veins, and repel these
Toxins with a slip of the tongue.
Around you I could line
Bodies of those you’d loved and left.
Each clasping hands with one another,
Privy to a specific type of pain, only you can
Deal out. And
In the center of the circle you’d
Stare, stunned by your state of
Affairs, and flings. Collectively concerned
For the safety of your
Rotting consciousness.
One by one, I could set these men
On fire, and hand you a place
Where your head could be danced off.
Drunken and diving heart-first into
The burning lake of a
Surfable crowd. Since that’s
All we are, serfs.
I hope the fire gets too close to your
Gorgeous face. I hope the
Love you receive is no more likable
Than a few more licks from the flames.
The scars couldn’t sideline you.
No one can stop ****
Jan 30, 2015
Jan 30, 2015 at 1:40 AM UTC
I'm at a loss for words here. I mean, five months back you were calling me baby and I was telling you that I loved you. Two months back, you shattered me. It's funny though because the night you let me go was the first time that I ever felt alive. The pain I felt as you violently tore yourself away from me was the perfect reminder that I am not numb to all things, no matter how hard I try to be. Now here we are in the present, ******* like we're lovers and talking like best friends. You're starting to call me baby again, and it scares me because every time you do, I almost want to tell you that I love you. But I'm trying my best to hold it in and not make the same mistake twice. Oh god, I swear every time you're inside of me, all I want to do is scream, and sometimes I do. Moans of pleasure, moans of pain. Almost inaudible moans that sound a lot like 'I love you'.
Jan 29, 2015
Jan 29, 2015 at 6:41 PM UTC
As cliché and dumb as this may sound, you made me stronger. You taught me that no matter how much time and effort you put into a friendship or relationship with someone, they will eventually leave. The promises and pleas become part of your past. You were toxic; a manipulative son of a ***** You were a pathological liar, a pretender, an actor, a game-playing mother ****** The fact that I relied on you and put most (all) of my faith into you makes me sick. It's unhealthy and I won't lie, it damaged me in ways that I'll feel forever. But it also helped me. I used to think that I'd never be okay if I didn't have you to rely on. But, these past few months I've realized that you can't count on anyone. The people that wiped your tears, patted your back, and scared the monsters away become the reason for the scars on your wrist. I hate that I let you do that to me. I was blinded and as a result, I have a few scars that will always remind me of you. You are toxic; a manipulative son of a ***** You are a patholical liar, a pretender, an actor, a game-playing mother ****** You're sick, but who isn't? That's no excuse. You are an excuse-maker as well. You're a good for nothing loser. But, you were good to me in the beginning. I was broken, and you nursed me back to health. So thank you, and **** you. **** you so much.
Jan 29, 2015
Jan 29, 2015 at 6:26 PM UTC