kissing you was like swerving into oncoming traffic
i can never tell if i am more haunted by empty picture frames or the ashes of their contents
you taught me that the saying "pick your battles" meant not answering when love was at the door
sometimes when i drink whiskey i swear i can hear your voice in the creases of my bedsheets & i sleep on the floor
i still catch myself running my hands over things you touched the most, looking for the echoes of your fingertips
i practice things i'll never say to you
i remember the day you told me you didn't like poetry, how "everything's already been said" & how "nothing meaningful can be captured without being cliche" you know, i don't miss you like the sun and moon, i do not miss you like tide bent waves crashing on the shoreline, i miss you like a chernobyl swingset misses children
rumor has it that drowning is a lot like coming home, that drinking bleach can **** the butterflies in your stomach
for your love of cigarettes, i would have been an ashtray
this halloween i want to dress up as the you when you loved yourself and show up on your doorstep
i never understood what you meant when you said i was an instrument, back when you would cup your hands around my chest and breathe through the holes in my heart, i still wonder if the sounds i made remind you of wind chimes
i never paid much attention to abandoned buildings until i became one
in my dreams all the flowers smell like your perfume
i am the only person who has ever wished for the same snowflake to fall twice
if i could go back, and rewrite the definition of audacity, it would be how when we lost the bet of love, you said "we never shook on it"
i love you, if the feeling is not mutual, please pretend this was a poem
the only apology i want from you, is to have you repeat the names of children we will never have in your parents living room until they *****
we are the same person if you find yourself up at 4am dry heaving promises, or if you are kept awake by the laughter of those who've abandoned you
nobody ever told you that goodbyes taste like the back of stamps
sometimes i'm convinced that the only reason we hug, is so you can check my back for exit wounds
May 20, 2014
May 20, 2014 at 9:29 AM UTC
It's laughable.
In the way that lets people know
you've maddened--
oh, you're a ripe, juicy
one now--
and also tells
them you learned the proper
definition of irony--
and the steam from your breath on
New Years' Eve
won't straighten out the wrinkles.
The laugh wrinkles on
your face are reflected as
frown lines in
your eyes.
It's laughable.
In the way that lets people know
absolutely nothing about why
you seem to have heard
something that made you
just split your sides with
laughter.
-LP
May 12, 2014
May 12, 2014 at 2:06 AM UTC
You left like a jumping fish.
If I had blinked,
I would have missed it
and seen only
your ripples
left behind.
I am a fish out of water--
Cliché, I know
(heartbreak is so overdone),
but gasping for
something Forever
Out of Reach.
She is a flying fish,
a fanciful gift
nature blessed
to glide through your life,
because you had water
and I, empty air,
and she could wing
beside you,
both of you leaving
your ripples behind.
Mar 23, 2014
Mar 23, 2014 at 11:19 AM UTC
I pledge allegiance to the way
you stare off into the distance.
And to the headaches that you get
when your stress replaces your skull.
Perpetually,
Unconditionally,
without ever a hesitation in my heart.
- LP
Mar 17, 2014
Mar 17, 2014 at 2:14 PM UTC
I birthed
a faceless character
and my amniotic aura leaked out
spreading langloriously
across https
.coms
///////
all over
the www.
My character
grew its skin
as a layer over mine
as thin as a tan
and as permanent as
true love
(whose permanence
s t r e t c h e s
to the size of your faith).
- LP
Mar 14, 2014
Mar 14, 2014 at 6:48 PM UTC
I want you to be my last words.
A quiet whisper in my mind--
or your name slipping from my lips
for the last time--
I wonder.
And I hope that I can pull it off,
that I could remember in a moment like that.
If you're around, I want to see you
and tell you I love you before I go
(I always say I love you before I go).
If you're not around, I'll just
whisper your name
to the air beneath my nose
one last time.
And if I can't speak,
I'll conjure up your essence
inside me.
My last words,
My eternity.
-LP
Mar 13, 2014
Mar 13, 2014 at 9:56 AM UTC
Hush.
If you are listening, close your eyes.
Don't think too hard.
Now--
Imagine,
Think of,
Hold in your mind,
the following sensations:
First,
a soft humming.
Imagine this soft humming.
Imagine the voice.
Imagine the tone.
Imagine a drone,
Imagine a melody,
a pleasant hum.
Next,
a soft humming.
Think of this soft humming.
Think of the lips.
Think of the purse.
Think of a source,
Think of a vibration,
a pleasant hum.
Last,
a soft humming.
Hold in your mind, this soft humming.
Hold in your mind, the texture.
Hold in your mind, the ambience.
Hold in your mind, a feeling of being swaddled,
Hold in your mind, a feeling of expansiveness,
a pleasant hum.
Hush.
If you are listening, open your eyes.
Don't think too hard.
-LP
Jan 29, 2014
Jan 29, 2014 at 7:11 PM UTC
She was led from darkness into meadows of blue sky.
She ran among the clouds and with the birds she learned to cry
Calls of purest sorrow mingled with purest of mirth.
She sang a howl in the wind of death and of rebirth.
Drinking from the bounty of the bosoms of her cloud,
One day did she descry a land beyond her misty shroud.
Licking milk from her fair lips, she skipped down on a breeze
And landed with a rustle far upon lush canopies.
Bent were boughs and branches, bark of brown and green and grey,
Beneath her bent, frail figure fainting with the light of day.
Night fell dark and stormy and the clouds swelled with their grief,
Upon the wind her figure borne, with ev'ry cursèd leaf.
Morning rose unbidden then upon the naked wood,
Living thing, and ornament, although none understood.
Gone was ev'ry hint of green, all around was bare;
Even where she fell before, no part of her was there.
Bare above was the pale sky, the clouds left not a trace;
Nor did they return there, where their dear one fell from grace.
Harshest rays of Sun bore down the fate of that cruel space.
Nothing more than dust and sand would occupy that place.
-LP
Jan 27, 2014
Jan 27, 2014 at 4:23 PM UTC
You are all out there
Sinning the good sins
And I'm home--
Just home--
With a sinful mind
And idle fingers,
Wishing such Lasciviousness
Upon
Myself,
Longing
For the bliss of the Forbidden.
Almost-innocent tears
(for I am not without fault)
Pass through me
In girlish stupidity.
I don't want this
Preoccupation.
I would prefer
Cognizant frolicking
In that which is Taboo.
If I cannot have peace,
I would have sin in its stead.
-LP
Nov 30, 2013
Nov 30, 2013 at 1:13 AM UTC
"I just wish you could be more understanding."
"Where would you like to go, your highness?"
"Yes."
"I feel very crazy right now."
"I feel like such a *****
"I have things you have told me repeating in my head."
"I'm sure your turkey tasted delicious and I'm sure the Christmas tree is beautiful."
"She doesn't want to speak to me?"
"I don't know, I have things to do; I'm not just sitting around."
"Nothing, I love you."
"It's not that easy."
"I will."
"I have to call him eventually."
-LP
Nov 30, 2013
Nov 30, 2013 at 12:45 AM UTC