I am lying
all alone in my bed.
I am thinking
all by myself in my head.
The phone's ringing
another message comes in.
The usual crap
throw it straight into the bin.
Almost forgot it's today.
But hey, even if I may
all those strangers will remind me
that today is "my" day...
_Outside the sun is shining
but I wish it'd rain.
The big spotlight is blinding
yet it's dark in my brain.
Today's the day
I wanna shut myself in at home.
I don't want your attention
please leave me alone._
Oh it's aunt A
what does she want?
Ah, just her once-a-year message...
I don't wanna respond.
12 hours left
better put the phone on mute.
All those people I don't care about
might think it quite rude.
But each and every message
it just says the same.
2 words without meaning
still, I am to blame?
You say I can make a wish
so here it is now:
Next year, same day,
please forget me somehow.
_Outside the sun is shining
but I wish it'd rain.
The big spotlight is blinding
yet it's dark in my brain.
Today's the day
I wanna shut myself in at home.
I don't want your attention
please leave me alone._
Aug 1, 2018
Aug 1, 2018 at 2:16 PM UTC
Not depressed:
Emotionless
inside, I can feel the emptiness.
Can't love, can't hate
is this my fate?
Searching:
Listening to that sad song.
Watching that movie full of sorrow.
Reading the gloomiest book I could find.
Listening to people talk about their dark pasts.
Ahh~ here it comes
the one thing I can feel...
Finally depressed again,
finally I feel alive.
Aug 1, 2018
Aug 1, 2018 at 5:44 AM UTC
Dance!
even though you **** at it.
Sing aloud!
even though you're shy.
Be crazy!
even though your mind is sane.
Be yourself!
even though you want to be someone else.
Talk to strangers!
even though you're scared.
Be honest!
even though your "friends" will hate you.
Have fun!
even though you're depressed.
Live!
even though...
Aug 1, 2018
Aug 1, 2018 at 4:31 AM UTC
On the thread of thought
one encounters many knots.
How to undo a knot?
You take perspectives,
look from left, from right,
above, below.
You think and think and think,
fiddle, fiddle, fiddle.
Yet no answer comes to mind.
The next step; you ask a friend:
This knot I have, what is the answer?
They think and think and think,
might even give an answer.
Does the knot get disentangled?
For the greatest knots this does not work,
no matter how many answers you will gather,
the knot remains.
But then there might come along a man,
who will give you peace of mind.
A sage who thought and thought and thought
for years and years and years,
and they will say:
This is a knot indeed.
And thus you look at your thread of thought again,
the knot’s still there.
But you feel the thread
and it feels smooth.
Jul 27, 2018
Jul 27, 2018 at 1:17 PM UTC