I wrote a poem for you the other day but ill never give it to you
Just like i wrote you a letter everyday that i felt your memory swipe at my brain stem that month of June
You left footprints when you walked out unknowing that i could follow but as time wore on the footprints began to fade and so did you..
Nov 11, 2023
Nov 11, 2023 at 11:14 AM UTC
This is what I see when I look at you,
someone that the world has beaten down over and over
yet this has only made you stronger instead of a victim
someone that has pulled himself out of the darkness countless times
only to have it make him brighter
I see someone who has been lost with no direction
yet created a map through the unknown to guide you home
I see someone who has fought
someone that gives his all
someone that loves so hard he sometimes forgets to love himself
I see someone that has the world waiting at his fingers tips
someone that deserves peace
someone I am more than proud of
I wish you could see yourself through my eyes
Oct 17, 2023
Oct 17, 2023 at 11:33 AM UTC
You know, I think that maybe you were the right person at the wrong time
maybe you were the right person in the wrong lifetime
Oct 16, 2023
Oct 16, 2023 at 10:15 AM UTC
it is said that in the seconds leading to death life flashes before your eyes
but mine didn't
it is said that this disease is a silent killer
but I have never heard a din so loud as the chemicals consume my brain
it is said that 24% of people relapse within the first year
I was a statistic
I wasn't strong enough
but this time
I will not be a statistic
because I am not who I was
Oct 15, 2023
Oct 15, 2023 at 12:18 PM UTC
The strongest earthquake ever recorded was a 9.5 on the richter scale
the ground began to shake
quivering at first rattling the tea cups on the shelf until
buildings began to crumble like they were made from a deck of cards
falling to the ground into heaps of rubble
sometimes I feel like I am stuck under the rubble
weighing down on my chest
crushing the air out of my lungs
but I think somewhere along the line I got used to it
made peace with the fact that no one was going to find me
Aug 20, 2023
Aug 20, 2023 at 11:55 AM UTC
They say it is a silent killer
but I have never heard a din so loud as the chemicals consume my brain
the voices in my head screaming for more
coercing my conscience
"just one, wait, that wasn't enough, a little more.. just a little more"
over and over
the cycle repeats
again and again
My heart is racing
my body is numb
I exhale
all the hurt
all the haunting memories
gone
over and over
the cycle repeats
again and again
"just one, wait, that wasn't enough, a little more.. just a little more"
Aug 6, 2023
Aug 6, 2023 at 2:02 PM UTC
see, I loved you with everything I had
and I know you loved me the best you could without loving yourself
you were fighting demons of your own design
doing everything you could to calm the eternal flames rising from your core
I spent years begging them to possess me instead
years fighting for you to love me in a way you couldn't
in the end, I got what I had been begging for
now, I am trying to dampen the flames rising from my core
fighting demons of my own design
Jun 25, 2023
Jun 25, 2023 at 4:17 PM UTC
She is now all elbows and bird limbs
Eating her ever smaller
Hearing her cry in the night ****** nails on a chalk board
I want to hold her help her
Be the rescue swimmer in her ocean of tears
Holding for I am soft
Her daughter no fine specimen
A coward
A softy
Not once did she hold me
In seventh grade when I had my first kiss and he broke up with me for the girl with blonde hair and bangs
She said I was just too young
In eighth grade I fell in lust with a high school boy for the first time and ended it when I got bored but not before I gave him what i thought symbolized love.
I didn't tell her
In 9th grade I fell in love with a boy that would never be able to love me the way I wanted him to. But I stayed for four years until I couldn't find any more of myself to break off and give to him.
She told me I would get over it.
I have a mother who the world made cold
And she had a daughter that felt too much
who she taught feeling was a waste of time
Jun 23, 2023
Jun 23, 2023 at 8:10 PM UTC
You were my foreword.
Everything that happened between us those four years were before the chapters began.
Every word leaned on the previous, piling together sentences that would sculpt the story
Stacking syllables to create a foundation
Counting apostrophes to prevent grammatical catastrophe.
But One was misplaced
And the tale compiled uneven
Backspace doesn't exist in this
And the story line is still not right
Jun 22, 2023
Jun 22, 2023 at 7:38 PM UTC
Hey babe.. Or maybe hey stranger is more applicable..
Because there is a lot of room for change in 619 days..
And enough time for a life where “you and I” existed to become past tense leaving two
individuals tied together by nothing but fragile strings of memories that will inevitably fade
enough to be painted over by a brighter color
Anyway,
I woke up last night gasping for air
Reaching for the ghost of you
Choking on the memory of how you made me feel whole
Sometimes I find myself wishing I had stayed home that night
Begging my brain to forget the first time I saw your smile
Or how your lips moved when you called me by the wrong name
My name you have since said thousands of ways and perfected in every tone
But I can't forget
I can't let go of the little things like how the freckles that pepper your shoulders get darker in the
summer
Or the story behind every scar
One night you traced a map to our future across my skin with black ink claiming there would be
no end
But the marker wasnt permanent
Eventually washing away
leaving me lost
screaming pleas of take me backs
Trying to retrace my steps
Waiting on something that has already disappeared
Jun 16, 2023
Jun 16, 2023 at 9:47 PM UTC