A very old man
Huffed and puffed and wheezed his way to a computer in the library today
Thank god there was aircon
I’m so tired of looking at Instagram
I can’t imagine having to huff and puff and wheeze up 6 flights when I’m walking with a cane
I once took Xanax and made sand angels on the beach for hours
There’s so much space on the beach
I bet it was easier to be Paul Varjak in the 60s
They still had stairs,
But otherwise, all you looked at were the clouds and your typewriter.
Oct 7, 2023
Oct 7, 2023 at 7:57 PM UTC
Tonight I fall asleep with you on my lips
I just got back from Paris and I think I'm still in love with my ex.
I feel like I'm putting on the slippers of my old ghost.
Now I think I was just ovulating.
But I want before sunset,
And passion that radiates out of me
Like the pressure of blood being pushed through veins, that I can’t stop.
A single look can hold infinité passion.
A whole relationship could hold nothing.
Oct 7, 2023
Oct 7, 2023 at 7:56 PM UTC
The milk in this cereal is going to **** me up later
Every day I fight feelings of emptiness
And the cinemas in Paris have bedbugs.
But that’s alright because the sky above the seine at 9 pm in summer could cure anything.
Except bedbugs.
Oct 7, 2023
Oct 7, 2023 at 7:55 PM UTC
In Paris I can pretend I'm a piece of seaweed
But I don’t.
Because I could never stand to be alone in silence.
Not even when the church bells ring.
Oct 7, 2023
Oct 7, 2023 at 7:55 PM UTC
Today I woke up to the warm feeling of your love, more delicate than I’d seen it in you. More sweet and delicious, more ripe, more bare.
I wish I could hold onto every thread of your love, your warm love, keep counting all the places you spelled my name with flowers in the trees.
I wish you loved the freedom in my soul as much as you loved the idea of me. I’ll see you now and again, in dreams where you visit me.
Aug 23, 2023
Aug 23, 2023 at 4:15 AM UTC
I want to find myself far away from you
And your shallow net of love
Too easily I slipped from your fingers
Too easily I dissipated from your mind
I want to find myself in headlights of dark highways
And foreign gas stations on roads unknown
Where I’ll feel whole in the lust of mystery
Where fresh beginnings grow on every corner
Where the scent of the air breathes differently
And color of the trees shine brighter
I want to find myself away from your memory
I fear how far I’ll have to outrun the roots of our intertwined youth.
I don’t want you to exist to me anymore.
Aug 23, 2023
Aug 23, 2023 at 4:14 AM UTC
I wish I could drag you into my wildest dreams
And we’d play like children
And you’d look after me
As we stroked on gently into slow living
And I kissed your cheeks in the kitchen
And we watched clouds from our garden
And rode bikes down to the water
And held hands as the sun set
Aug 23, 2023
Aug 23, 2023 at 4:13 AM UTC
Suddenly I look for you
In crowded bars
In the darkness of nighttime streets
I look for you in the muscle
Of big tall men
Around the corners of every turn
I look for you in my sleep
And in my daydreams
I long for you in my darkest moments
Aug 23, 2023
Aug 23, 2023 at 4:13 AM UTC
My wrists ache
From these chains
I pull harder and harder
And I know one day I will escape
But only when I’m bleeding
And to bleed will feel so good
And to leave will feel so good
To run from this tormentor
I think he likes when I try escape
I think he likes when I show pain
When he watches
I will only smile
Aug 23, 2023
Aug 23, 2023 at 4:13 AM UTC
All I do is torture myself
By dreaming of you
And dreaming of something else’s
Aug 23, 2023
Aug 23, 2023 at 4:12 AM UTC