That screen that i stare at for hours is my love that provides affection that i desperately need
Im connected to a virtual reality that stimulates my dophamine giving me the will to want to breathe
That screen i stare at provides false hope that i can truly be myself without being ridiculed
I see others just like me halfway across the world being happy to be true to themselves but boy was i fooled
That phone i am always on is a necessity for the survival of my sanity
Its my drug that i take to disalude myself from people and my pitiful reality
Under the black coat is a rainbow tshirt marked pride but i am a prisoner to this phone and this flawed society
I wear a mask to hide my insecurity by avoiding people who will eventually reject me
Ive been told to just because youre not straight doesnt mean you should not love makeup
Im constantly told to be the person society wants to see and the bullshitting comments screws me up
Im frustated about constantly being pressured to be someone im not so my phone saves the day
It takes me to another planet away from everything that makes me miserable and to where im free to be my version of gay
Ive been told to act like everyone else and stop chasing girls that i naturally have affection for
Im a hyperactive 20year old that is sensitive to the darts that pierce my very core
Im an androgonous resilient romantic adult that longs for love and affection
My phone again becomes my coping mechanism to suppress all the insecurity about my identity and societal expectations
I call this phone my lifesaver my love and buddy when i have nobody
I am a loner that is tired of feeling overburdened by how i am perceived by to everybody
This phone rescues me from my own self and takes me to another dimension
I am happy free and unapoogetically myself in my imagination
Dec 4, 2017
Dec 4, 2017 at 7:27 PM UTC
Touch me tenderly to take the tormenting thoughts of my past
Let your warmth come close to my body and stay on me for this wonderful moment to last
Your presence is the only peace i have whilst enduring the turbulent waters
My shivering body shattered heart and confused mind remains still since you turn my sorrow into laughter
Your voice whispering sweetly in my ears defrosts the ice surrounding and holding the pieces of my heart
My heart explodes from the passion i have for you that you triggered from the very start
Your lips pressed against mine sends electricity through my spine and ignites flames in my body
I am taken to another dimension when you work wonders on me
Expose my body only for your eyes to see the treasures that lay below
Lie on top of me just as i am exposed to you so i can feel your skin on mine where the esctacy between us will grow
Our noises in this dimension are a soulful melody to my ears
Your kisses and touch causes my body to lose touch wyith this world since ive never experienced such a high in all my years
Dec 4, 2017
Dec 4, 2017 at 6:48 PM UTC
Society calls me broken since i do not conform into the conditioning of fitting into their boxes of normality
Im pressured to change my human nature failing at every attempt causing me to see the dark side of my reality
Im left with feelings of inadequacy and a low self esteem from every word of condemnation
I cannot help who i am but am made to feel as though my efforts are never good enough resulting in further frustration
My passion is confused for obsession and my perspective on life is seen as flawed
At this age i crave relationships and *** but only being in church has me bored
My interests in God at the moment isnt strong because everything now concerning him gets monotonous
I have evolved into a curious 20 year old and its misunderstood for being carnal when having a thrill is my only wish
When i do not take concerta im hyperactive and humourous and its the one way i have fun despite my monotonous routine
If i speak my true mind and act out on every impulse in my body itll be seen as a profanity
To me my mind and soul runs deeper than all the oceans ever known
Another way i keep my peace is to stay engrossed in my world on my phone
Wearing masks all the time to please this judgemental society is quite exhausting
They remain happy while i slowly die screaming on the inside from all this pretending
The truth is that im open to love from man or woman and i want to help the helpless people in society
I love adventure and to me anything unique trait in someone i admire attracts me
I am an inquisitive person and i wonder why people blame the devil for evil when God made the devil
God is the creater of evil and good so shouldnt he be responsible for all thats awful
He had knowledge prior to the devils creation that the devil would have betrayed him and then he regretted his own creation
If i knew that would have happened i would have never invented a work of art to bring devastation
God has never recompensed the African race for years of torture from slavery
He has inflicted curses on innocent children and has called missionaries to have their lives cruelly snatched for their acts of bravery
Yet the devil is blamed but i hold the creator of the devil
responsible
The other injustices in life angers me because i cant do anything about it which is incredibly painful
I honestly walk around with the weight of the injustices of this world upon my shoulder
Every time i see more corruption and innocent people paying for the guilty my heart breaks further
I see so many unanswered questions to life just being shoved under the carpet
I prefer to remain oblivious to it so i can keep the little peace and sanity i have left so i wont live full of regret
I want to live my life to the fullest by travelling the world and having new experiences
I desire independence so i can remove the mask of normality and pretense
I want to die with a smile on my face because ive fulfilled my life's purpose
I want to leave a legacy of greatness and accomplishment for future generations before humanity can get a chance to get worse
Dec 4, 2017
Dec 4, 2017 at 6:46 PM UTC