neptune held my hand
with such fervor,
an icy grip that surrounded
me
with stars
and rivers of nebulas.
saturn choked me,
with shining rings
and twinkling mist
i wanted to drown myself
in the feeling.
pluto
reached through
galaxy ceilings,
invited me to the edges of
creation.
jupiter asked me
if i wanted to dance
on its diamond clouds,
a burgundy storm.
and the earth
tore at my ankles,
ripped my soles,
and swallowed my waist
until i was
here.
where
mortality
lies.
Dec 5, 2018
Dec 5, 2018 at 9:37 PM UTC
sometimes
i refuse to
write poetry
because inspiration
only comes from
sad
times
this realization
makes me
even
sadder
Dec 5, 2018
Dec 5, 2018 at 9:22 PM UTC
i wish
that love
still
ignited a raging fire
inside my chest
and flowed sparks through
my veins
and masked my
brain
with smoke
so the loneliness
wouldn't feel
as
cold
Dec 5, 2018
Dec 5, 2018 at 9:09 PM UTC
people quit things
and they quit because they don't get enough recognition.
they think they deserve thousands of likes and comments
to validate their own personal success
i quit things
because i don't think enough people tell me that i am good enough
and thats just wrong
Sep 20, 2018
Sep 20, 2018 at 10:10 PM UTC
my hands are cold
and my soul is hot
burning and sputtering
with a passion for others
with a yearning to please all
but sometimes
my soul only flickers
wisps and kisses with weak heat
while other's souls lick my warmth
so i stumble
and i fall
down
but grasp a flame
of another
to aid me in the healing of my soul
but i am drowned
in a shivering ice
and told never to take from an other's soul
for i am just a supplier, and i am not allowed to take what i give
because taking is taking
and my flames wisps, a final breath
i assume i must let it go
for i am a charity and do not deserve to help myself
if taking from others is condemned
why do others take from me?
May 4, 2018
May 4, 2018 at 10:42 PM UTC
why is my only talent losing friends?
why can i only think about my failed relationships?
was it my fault?
should i have said sorry?
should i have stood my ground unapologetically?
i feel trapped in this revolution of making friends and losing them i'm going insane
have i not learned already?
have i not felt enough pain?
enough loneliness?
enough self-hatred for my own shortcomings?
if i live the way i want,
if i live without apologizing,
if i live with a confidence that needs no justification from others,
who will i have then?
what person would be there?
this constant repetition over and over again
i can't take it
please make it stop
May 4, 2018
May 4, 2018 at 10:31 PM UTC
The excuse of being tired:
an avoidance of admitting depression
Jan 14, 2018
Jan 14, 2018 at 9:43 PM UTC
how can everybody walk around a burning building
and act like they don't see it?
don't feel the heat on their skin?
don't smell the putrid smoke?
don't hear the deafening flames?
how can people block out the cry of a child?
how can they ignore the sobs of a depressed teenager?
how do they go on with their lives not bothered by sadness?
please tell me how.
so i can tell them there is a burning building.
so they can cry with the child.
and sob with the teenager
and the world will be filled with wails of togetherness
and the sorrow will be shared
so the building doesn't have to burn
and the child doesn't have to cry
and the teenager doesn't have to be depressed
and we live seeing, hearing, smelling, and feeling everything
Jan 14, 2018
Jan 14, 2018 at 1:47 PM UTC
Today I learned
Family
Does not live under the same roof
Support
Does not have to come from my parents
Friends
Will always be there
Pain
Is only temporary
Love
Is infinitive
And my happiness
Is most important
Above
Everything
Jan 12, 2018
Jan 12, 2018 at 7:17 PM UTC
take what i'm giving you
change it, if that is what you desire
give it away, if that is what you want
refuse what i'm offering, if it is your decision
i am not giving it to you in the way only i want you to see it
that is not what my words will do
my words will be taken in the way you want to hear it
i have realized
my mind has no control of your conscience
it is only if you hand me that power
you have no choice but to
take what i'm giving you
Jan 7, 2018
Jan 7, 2018 at 8:23 PM UTC