My wardrobe's full of sparkly dresses
But I don't know anymore who to wear them for
My life's excess has sustained the press
I asked for more, became their darling *****
They gave me a glass cage and called it a home
Put me on a cross and called it a throne
Danced like a ballerina in hopes to please
The hungry abonnés should fulfill my wish
Spotlight on the stage replaced my sun
I'm a property of everyone
And I sometimes think I do regret
Selling myself as a marionette...
Ruffled hemline dresses, different shiny gowns
Nightly royal dance ball in different shiny towns
Smiling to impress and not to express
A damsel should not let them see her distress
They gave me a noose and called it a necklace
Told me to patch up my porcelain crevice
Broke my fingers to make it fit into the shoes
Stitched my lips into a smile, romanticized this abuse
Camera flashes replaced my stars--
A price to pay for a superstar
And I always think I do regret
Selling myself as a marionette...
Arms tied with hard strings
Lips sealed for the ventriloquist
And I do, I do, I do regret
Selling myself as a marionette.
Dec 23, 2020
Dec 23, 2020 at 1:39 AM UTC
You searched the world for a lullaby
and found it in their screams and cry.
Your greatest art was death itself
and your melody was their beg for help.
But let's go back to your story's start,
when you still didn't have a monster's heart.
Let us go back to your innocence,
when your world was confined behind your backyard fence.
You once had been a young good boy
but with a family like those broken toys.
Your parents' fights were your fairytales
and your bedtime story was your mother's wails.
You'll go to school with hidden cuts--
black-blue bruises from your father's bat.
And though they tried to be friends with you,
their happiness was your source of blue.
Until one day, you found a cure;
her name's Emily, a bliss so pure.
Her smile, your happiness; her eyes, your stars;
her hugs, your haven; her tears your scars.
You learned to find the sweet from the bitter,
hoped that maybe there's a happy ever after.
You've buried your heart in darkness' grave,
not knowing that soon enough, you will be saved.
Yet fate won't let you get away;
peace and joy will never stay.
Your precious one, they took and ****
Emily's dead, lying cold and still.
The pain you've buried for many years,
the darkest past, your endless tears
the rage you've buried brave
came crawling back out of its grave.
"Evil is good, retribution is fair!"
Goodness became something you don't want to care
Justice you'll bring with bloods on your hands
Farewell to the angels, by the devil you stand.
Aug 14, 2020
Aug 14, 2020 at 9:30 AM UTC
You carved your name on my skin
Without planning on staying
Hoping to leave behind
A scar to use any time
And your I love yous
Ceased to mean anything—
They are naught but a spell
You know how to summon me well
But why do you have to use
Dark spells on me?
You caged me inside
my own fantasy
We used to be magical,
Didn’t we?
So why do you have to use
Dark spells on me?
I’ve given up my youth
To have your knowledge
And felt some emotions
I could barely manage
Gave you my heart
Once stony cold
Only for you to melt it
In fire and blood
Is there really no soul
in that lonely shell?
Are you really that miserable
To not treat me well?
I drank your tears
In hopes to understand you
I broke my own heart
To gain your point of view
But why do you have to use
Dark spells on me?
You caged me inside
my own fantasy
We used to be magical,
Didn’t we?
So why do you have to use
Dark spells on me?
We could have been enchanted
But now I just wanna be free
You should have never used
Your dark spells on me.
Aug 10, 2020
Aug 10, 2020 at 7:52 AM UTC
walking away from you
feels like walking barefoot
on a rough pavement littered
with a million little shards.
walking away from you
feels like being stuck
in an asylum full of
crazies while I have
the misfortune of
keeping my sanity.
walking away from you
means bleeding every single
night as the demons
dance on my bed
and carve their
names on my
skin.
walking away from you
is the same as melting
my heart slowly
into blood and
nothingness.
but i'd rather walk away from you
and squeeze my heart out of
this fiery passion and emotions,
i'd rather walk on the million
unforgiving shards,
and be imprisoned with
the insane savages,
i'd rather let the demons
**** my soul...
...than stay with you
and not be loved
back at all.
Aug 2, 2020
Aug 2, 2020 at 1:51 AM UTC
*Light, light the rose candle
and let it brighten up the night
listen to the story it tells
before it fades by your sight.*
*Smell, smell its sweet scent
and watch its little flame dance
know, know what it has meant
before you lose your chance.*
Mar 12, 2020
Mar 12, 2020 at 5:58 AM UTC
I was afraid of darkness once
of silly things, and deadly dance.
I was afraid of nightly tales
where lovers died and heroes failed.
I was afraid of phantom woes
and wails at night of dreadful ghosts,
I was afraid of witches’ spells
and demons in the burning hell.
Yet all these fears were proven small
compared to one I’d learned in fall
for the greatest fear that was soon to call
was having you and not at all.
Mar 6, 2020
Mar 6, 2020 at 10:20 AM UTC
why do we have
to fix a heart
that we didn't break
in the first place?
why do we need
to suffer from
the pain caused by
someone else's disgrace?
why do we need
to share a kiss
with someone's worn
out pair of lips?
why do we have
to share the pain
of a stillborn future
and past what-ifs?
why do we stay
if we're not the first?
why do we have them
at their worst?
Mar 4, 2020
Mar 4, 2020 at 9:51 PM UTC
She left traces on your body
Like mazes running through
The veins, in your bloodstream
I feel them, I do, I do!
I taste it in your kisses
The vestige of her lips
I know your mouth still misses
The love you couldn't keep
I feel it in the goodbyes
You utter easily to me
I know you got me captured
But I don't want to be set free
I know you loved her deeply--
I feel it in your touch
So now I often wonder
If you could love me just as much
Mar 3, 2020
Mar 3, 2020 at 6:45 PM UTC
i tried to love another
but my heart goes back to you
i asked the stars to remember--
they don't seem to have a clue.
i paint myself a different color,
yet i still go back to blue.
it seems i won't forget you,
no matter what i do.
Mar 3, 2020
Mar 3, 2020 at 9:14 AM UTC