I feel like people are the wind
They pass by and I really don’t mind
Though I stand here with this sign
My eye off in the distance
I don’t even try
Someone drops a bill
I don’t check to see
Is it pride that keeps my gaze?
I wish the rain would fall
I used to have
But I lost
They said make a move
Roll the dice
Its better to have tried
Now its better to have died
In these moments of sober thought
I have these thoughts
How can someone who has
Parallel my grief?
Yet we share
Every stone hits the same rock
Bottom
Is there always a bottom?
Or is that just another trap door
People are the wind
As they pass by
I sink into my bones
Its so easy to not move
To not cry
To feel
To see
To think
I hold a sign
Because what else would I do?
Sit on a bench?
Sleep under a tree?
People are the wind
Aug 18, 2016
Aug 18, 2016 at 8:46 PM UTC
I never thought my mentality could be torn to such an extent.
Worse than the slaps
The shoves
the kicks
the punches
I went in for Joy
I had hope
never thought I could live a life so exhausted
Stress is the word of the day. Every day
But its so overdone
It goes beyond anxiety.
Fear
helplessness
Every cent I earn goes to the family we were supposed to be
creating
Now its all going to the family I wish I could be
deserting
How can I love her when I come home and
“You're a piece of ****
“Where were you all day?”
“You're a piece of ****
I'm a piece of **** I'm a ************* piece of ****
I'm gone to often, I don't dress nice, always on my phone
have to many **** friends
don't care enough
never clean
smell horrible
can't perform
don't love her enough
Tell me a way to show my love
Tell me
I want to know
because maybe it will get her to stop
maybe it will get her to
be who I told “I do”
It was all mental for a while
I thought when you broke it was like
in half
I didn't know there were
shatters
tears
splits
explosions
My identity was numb by the time she started physically
my friends and family believe the rumors
*********** has addicted another husband
I don't have what it takes be a
“real man”
No hope, no reason, no soul
her life
her punching bag
her creativity
Don't tell me women can't physically abuse
they're not dumb
You get punched, slapped, kicked
so you grab her
see you in a year when you get out
she called in and there was marks on
her arms from your hands
now you're the guy who has no pride
I haven't had one for a while
If I did I would have been locked up
two years ago
But I also don't have a me
so its easier
It hurts yes
but I'm in more pain when I think about not being
able to see my boy
Sep 12, 2015
Sep 12, 2015 at 7:49 PM UTC