My heart can't help but think of you
can't let go of you
can't pretend I never felt this way
can't pretend, can't pretend-
when every song reminds me of you
our memories
our playfulness
our laughter
our endless conversations.
Was it never love?
Was it all a dream?
then why does it hurt
why did it feel so real?
why did you touch my heart
and then silence.
No more "good morning"
No more "I miss you"
Confused what was
and what could have been
What did you feel?
Was it love?
Was it ever love?
May 14, 2025
May 14, 2025 at 12:23 AM UTC
Every minute of every day
occupied with many thoughts-
Every break from every moment
I think of you a lot.
Trying to convince myself it's nothing
that these feelings will fade-
That these feelings were just feelings
and never meant to stay.
Is it nothing when my heart melts,
with each smile that I see?
With every thought is about you
and of you next to me?
The constant reminders surround me
and I don't know what to do?
If these feelings are more than feelings
am I in love with you?
Feb 23, 2025
Feb 23, 2025 at 11:10 PM UTC
I feel like I've fallen hard for you
a love consumed my heart-
A forbidden feeling that grew through time
is now tearing me a part.
Reliving our every moment
each word that we've shared-
Convinced that things aren't different
that your feelings are still there.
Every song, every sunrise
brings tears to my eyes-
Longing for those smiles and laughter
that brought happiness every time.
But reality finally hit me
to know it's no longer true
That our love is just a memory
a secret between me and you.
....but I'll always love you.
Feb 23, 2025
Feb 23, 2025 at 2:35 PM UTC
Each day is such a misery
to hide, so no one sees-
the surrow behind this mask
behind this fake happy.
Forcing the laughter, this smile
pretending it's all okay-
Living a lie I can't reveal
just pains me every day.
Can't show any weakness
any vulnerability-
But impersonate an image
that hurts constantly.
My heart is overwhelmed
with pain that no one knows-
A smile to hide behind the hurt
that I'm forced not to show.
Oct 7, 2024
Oct 7, 2024 at 11:49 AM UTC
Out of breath, my heart is pounding
the tears falling slow
No energy no motivation
its really time to go.
Uncontrollably the tears fall more
my feeling's hard to say
Self-loathing thoughts weigh heavy
Fuckin' hate feeling this way.
Day by day and step by step
the hope is hard to see
So tired of wearing this heavy mask
of someone who isn't me.
The tears constantly flowing
this pain deep in my heart
A life so overwhelming
and tearing me apart.
Defeated and lonely
why is life so cruel
So lonely, so exhausted
I don't know what to do?
Sep 17, 2024
Sep 17, 2024 at 10:23 AM UTC
Bottled up inside my heart
Are the clouds above me
are the sad movies replaying
That I can only see.
Back to these feelings
that never seem to fade
Feelings so permanent
unexpectedly invade.
A broken image in the mirror
a reflection so unreal
So far a part from reality
Feels hopeless to heal.
Time to remove this mask
Where reality is hard to face
and this pain is neverending
so difficult to erase.
My eyes wide open
I no longer want to see
To wake up to another day
of this painful reality.
Sep 16, 2024
Sep 16, 2024 at 8:54 AM UTC
I'm lost, its dark inside
can hardly take a breath-
Can't escape from this pain
that's leading to my death.
No sunshine, just grey clouds
hovering over me-
The storm of tears that fall
every day and constantly.
Suffocating inside myself
I don't know where to go?
I don't know what to do?
I wish I was dying slow.
Why am I so pathetic
So sad and so weak-
Why am I so insecure
To never want to speak.
Still dark, I'm lost forever
Still tearing me a part-
No one here to rescue me
and left with a broken heart.
Sep 13, 2024
Sep 13, 2024 at 8:26 PM UTC
Slowly losing hope
Don't want to live today
Don't want to feel the pain
and ever feel this way.
Trying hard to fight
To maybe live again
And never be the burden
Of someone who seeks the end.
Broken and defeated
So difficult to breathe
Holding on to what I have
As my heart constantly bleeds.
Tired, so very tired
no hope for me to see
I'm tired of being who I am
this life is cruel to me.
Each day is very challenging
to just get out of bed
Struggling with self-loathing thoughts
constantly wishing I was dead.
Sep 13, 2024
Sep 13, 2024 at 2:51 PM UTC
Why hold on to the past
when the past doesn't want me
The past are just memories
of who I used to be.
Why does it even matter
for that life has gone away-
Those days I thought meant everything
was never meant to stay.
Why bother reminiscing
when it means nothing to anyone
Why envy all the yesterdays
for all those days are gone.
Why does my mind keep going back
why must it always see
Those days of loving happiness
that is no longer meant for me.
Sep 12, 2024
Sep 12, 2024 at 4:19 PM UTC
Life leads us through journeys
and pathways we'd never see-
Preferences we never fathom
are adored unexpectedly.
The days we never saw coming
a stranger became a friend-
Then grew into infatuation
never thought to love again.
The treasure life has brought us
and risks we both take-
To unexpectedly be together
a secret but not a mistake.
Unanticipated moments
created a love so strong-
Throughout this journey together
feels so right and never wrong.
Life never works the way as planned
changes along the way-
Old habits to new beginnings
to be together soon one day.
Sep 24, 2021
Sep 24, 2021 at 12:25 AM UTC