i am a victim.
i am not yet a survivor.
i dont know if i will survive this.
Apr 22, 2019
Apr 22, 2019 at 7:29 PM UTC
the sickness
is returning.
i didnt infect myself this time though
you passed it to me
through your fistfuls of my hair
through the "i love you's"
all the contradicting lies
my body became weak
and you took hold
of something you knew i had no control
there isnt a cure for this one.
Mar 31, 2019
Mar 31, 2019 at 11:45 PM UTC
you make me want to see the colors
that my own mind has robbed me of
sometimes i don't see the hues that i once loved
or want to
you understand this though
and youre okay with watching things with me
in black and white
Mar 13, 2019
Mar 13, 2019 at 10:47 PM UTC
this is a pain i haven't felt since the last time
one that is ripping through my body
this pain only comes when it gets bad
and i am in agony every second
Feb 20, 2019
Feb 20, 2019 at 6:52 PM UTC
i apologize
for all the things i never said anything
for all the times i didn't speak up
for all the times i let you make me feel uncomfortable in my own skin
for all the times i let you make me feel guilty
for all the times i let you get away it
for all the times i let you win
for all the times i let you make me cry at 2am
i apologize for never telling you
that you were ruining everything about me
that you made me hate myself
and that this hate continues to run through my veins
for you
and for me
and everything that slipped through the cracks in between
as you broke me
Feb 10, 2019
Feb 10, 2019 at 9:34 PM UTC
my words
they can't escape through my sobs
i've tried to tell you countless times
but they are trapped in my throat
trying to make their way out through my gasps of air
im choking on all the things i want to say to you
Jan 27, 2019
Jan 27, 2019 at 8:14 PM UTC
mental and physical
ifeelweak
i feel as if i don't have a place
but maybe
i take up too much space
Jan 19, 2019
Jan 19, 2019 at 10:14 PM UTC
i did it.
i finally let the thoughts take over.
im sick.
Jan 14, 2019
Jan 14, 2019 at 1:42 PM UTC
i dont want to admit this
every time it gets late my thoughts come back
its a comfort thing
but then it becomes a bad thing
i swallow
and i swallow
and then i cry
and i cry
i try not to consume
but it gets late and i feel lost
and i don't want to talk about it
i always feel so empty
i try to fill the space
but its getting to the point
where i want to empty it
i want nothing
Jan 12, 2019
Jan 12, 2019 at 10:26 PM UTC
i feel weak
everyday another piece of me folds in
slowly
im becoming the thing you never wanted to see
im becoming to reach the point you hoped i would never
im the piece of paper in the bottom of your bag
the one you needed
you lost it and spent ages looking for it
but by the time you found it
it was torn to shreds
it was no longer useful
and you groaned and complained
but then you got another
and you were thankful that there were others
to replace the one you forgot about
until it was too late
but i couldn't forget
i laid there in pieces wondering what happened
you cared
but you realized it got bad
and then you realized it was too late
and you moved onto the next person to care about
until it was too late for them too.
Jan 8, 2019
Jan 8, 2019 at 10:42 PM UTC