Was I *****
Maybe I wanted it?
That intoxicated girl,
She must have said yes.
But that girl was me.
I did not say yes.
Was I *****
only a vague memory of the night
But the morning, a vivid reality.
Waking up naked in my bed,
To a strange man walking out my door.
Thanking me for sleeping with him.
But I did not say yes.
Was I *****
He seemed like a nice guy.
Maybe I fell on the walk home.
That's why there was blood and bruises,
On the most intimate parts of my body.
He did take me back to my room.
But I did not say yes.
Was I *****
The memories will forever haunt me.
But months of hell and healing,
Have led me to realize:
I did not say yes.
I was *****
Jan 13, 2016
Jan 13, 2016 at 10:06 PM UTC
“If I have a daughter
and she starts to
feel the pressure I once felt
I will let her dye her hair
blue, red, green even
I will let her cut it
straighten it
shave it
I will let her wear black eyeliner
and lipsticks
I will let her wear
basketball shorts
and short skirts
and hoodies
and black ripped jeans
I’ll listen to her cry
over boys
over girls
over *******
and ********
and teachers
and the world
and the universe
And every day
I’ll tell her I love her
I’ll tell her I’m proud of her
I’ll tell her she’s strong
smart
capable
until she realizes
accepts
she does not
need to be
called beautiful
cool
different
to be herself”
Mar 27, 2015
Mar 27, 2015 at 10:14 AM UTC
-the raindrops remind me of waking up on 4th of July feeling lonely.
-my sheets whisper your name everytime i dare to move. i ache.
-my last text from you was 8.12.13
-You are beautiful. and i am sad. We will never work out.
-sometimes i wear red lipstick to see my psychiatrist. I just want to feel strong.
-i sleep for 14 hours and wake up tired.
-the ghosts in my room tug on my curls. they remind me of You.
-i feel tainted.
-oh god, oh god, oh god.
-whilst i sleep the waves rush over my head. i feel peace.
-there have been bugs in my veins since the last time we slept together.
-i am nothing, i am nothing, i am nothing.
-i have been using clever words so You will think i still have a brain.
-i sit in the bath until it turns grey to remind myself that i am dirt.
-i can not be a self love poem.
-You left me drunk and naked everytime.
-i am the beginning of a long, cold winter.
-i am a snowflake amongst sunflowers and children playing.
-Pain. Pain. Pain.
-the ringing in my ears has gotten louder since You said You missed me.
-i will never be Sylvia Plath.
-these walls scream out my secrets.
-i would like to be naked Polaroids and cocktails
but i am £2.31 white wine and ugly obscenities.
-i am an increase of prozac.
-You always mentioned your hate for winter.
-i will crave you for eternity.
-the earth will tremble like my voice. hands. eyes.
-this rain will last forever.
May 29, 2014
May 29, 2014 at 3:32 PM UTC
I've always had a love for you
Deep inside me I've always loved
Something about you
Was it your smile?
Your beautiful eyes?
Maybe it was that wonderful personality
Either way it made me fall in love
And boy did I fall hard.
May 22, 2014
May 22, 2014 at 11:21 PM UTC
I cried,
I wept;
My heart
You kept.
Yet still
You left
Without
Regret.
May 22, 2014
May 22, 2014 at 11:21 PM UTC
And its this late at night that it hits me the most
I wont ever see you again, well maybe your ghost.
I hope when I look upon your watch
Thats when you look down and catch a glimpse of the person I've come to be
A person that at a quick glance could be mistaken for you
I know that the disease ate your mind up so quickly that all you remember was my faults
But I hope when you look down on me now your proud of your only granddaughter because I've become proud to say you're my angel.
And its this late at night that it hits me the most
I wont ever see you again, well maybe your ghost
May 22, 2014
May 22, 2014 at 11:20 PM UTC
“I’ll smoke countless
Cigarettes
And leave countless
Scars
On my arms
Turn my lungs
Black
And **** myself up
If it means that
I won’t have to
Remember every ****
Second of that
******* day
And oh my god I
Just need to forget,
The pain is driving
Me insane, and I don’t
Want to hold on
Any longer so why am
I still here?”
May 6, 2014
May 6, 2014 at 8:23 AM UTC
If you have anxiety
and you think your shaking voice is a weakness, marry somebody
who thinks it is the sweetest thing
they have ever heard. Marry somebody
who judges the quality of words
instead. Or if they get stuck in your head
like that one thing you said at a party 2 years ago
that you still regret.
Apr 17, 2014
Apr 17, 2014 at 9:19 AM UTC
I wish that
I could see myself
Through your eyes
A reflection they should be
My mirror to your
Soul
But then I think
That I probably
Don't want to know
What you think of someone
Like me
Apr 16, 2014
Apr 16, 2014 at 7:42 AM UTC