I went to see the bats because I did not want to be home
the bats never came
I stood out in the cold and waited for an hour
It felt good to be able to identify that my fingers where numb
I broke a piece of the rotting fence as I waited
carving my name into the soft wood
I thought “one day I will point this out and say I wrote this. I was here and saw the bats”.
But it become dark
the crowd of people dwindled until it was just me
waiting for the bats who never came
Dec 14, 2021
Dec 14, 2021 at 11:18 PM UTC
There is something about eyes that scares me
A depth that can never be reached
Revealing no one will be pleased
That a little tempting sadness will be unleashed
Eyes are the gate into one’s soul
Representing what we hold most dear
Be careful not to stare too deep into that hole
For you may just fall into a foreign frontier
I find that they mirror insides
Anger shines with wrath
Fire rolling through iris in red tides
Sadness rushing in waves of a rolling path
I am scared that a look into my eyes
Will tell you all that you need to know
My secrets will be no longer be in guise
Trapped inside of green and yellow
My tears rush down my face
The sadness at war with my mind
Has won with grace
No longer confined
And my eyes gave me away
Now one look will tell you all you need to know
My eyes are the gateway
Into my hidden pain, they glow
That was once in chains
Now freed by the truth
In my eyes
Just look
Feb 7, 2021
Feb 7, 2021 at 11:08 PM UTC
The mirror taunts me
She knows something I do not
She holds within her a truth
The truth
Reflecting back truth
I do not recognize her anymore
Those cold eyes
And selfish intentions
Every day she changes
Always reflecting
the truth
That I am not the same person
And I do not know those eyes
Staring into my soul
Taunting me
Feb 7, 2021
Feb 7, 2021 at 10:45 PM UTC
To those around her
she was quiet
always kind
the sweet innocent one
To her friends
she was always there
not part of the conversation
just present
To her best friend
she was stable
always on her side
never with any problems
To herself
she was always strong
fighting to love herself
surprisingly unbroken
to everyone
she was unimportant
always invisible
always
Apr 11, 2020
Apr 11, 2020 at 10:59 AM UTC
the halls were quite today
filled with a cloud of sadness
it swam in everyone’s eyes
we were drowning in loss
“i’ve lost the ability to be happy. the fog covers everything”
i turned to look at her
strands of curly blonde hair crumpled in knots
her puffy eyes perpetually watery
she was on the verge of breaking
holding herself together with nothing
everywhere you looked people were torn apart
by the boy who crashed his car and died
Apr 11, 2020
Apr 11, 2020 at 10:40 AM UTC
a face is haunting me
it’s all i can see in the darkness of night
hovering above my consciousness
slowly filling the cracks in my heart
until all i can see is loneliness
the piercing eyes remind me
that i killed
it
i destroyed it
to a haunting memory
of teenage innocence
of laying in bed wrapped in a blanket
holding hands while staring into his eyes
laughing till tears streamed down my cheeks
washing away stress
till he was all i saw
the face won’t let me forget
that i killed him
it drifts in and out
now all i see is him
looking at me in confusion
whispering “i’m sad”
that crestfallen face won’t let me forget
that i killed everything
there is a face haunting me
Jan 24, 2020
Jan 24, 2020 at 6:21 AM UTC
i am waiting
for my thoughts to spiral
uncontrollably, twisting and turning
until i am trapped in a knot of despair
unable to unravel my own mind
i am waiting
for my mouth to open
angrily, gasping and heaving
until i am destroyed by inescapable darkness
unable to expel my own demons
i am waiting
for the knife to not be sharp enough
anxiously, cutting and failing
until i am left with a tiny scar
unable to vanish from my soul
i am waiting
to not be enough to stay
foolishly, hoping and wondering
until i realize i will always be just here
the person who never leaves
who will never be noticed
but is always waiting until one day she is
waiting on a dream
Jan 23, 2020
Jan 23, 2020 at 7:41 PM UTC
The words float upon air
dancing to the tune of smoke
twisting
turning
I watch them go
from my lips
to your ears
so effortless
weightless
and yet they held the suffocating meaning of my heart
there was so much heaviness laced within
those particles of invisible waves
Nov 24, 2019
Nov 24, 2019 at 9:52 PM UTC
in one breath,
i lost everything
there was a hole in my heart
draining me of life
i put on a mask
to cover up my true nature
so that someone would come
and fill that hole up
instead slowly i began to leak
seeping into other people
until all that was left
was nothing
i opened my mouth
to scream for help
but all that came out was
a thundering silence
that enveloped the whole room
creating a black hole
leaving nothing
so in one breath
i lost everything
to nothing
Jan 20, 2019
Jan 20, 2019 at 4:20 PM UTC
The morning light creeps in,
slowly,
into every crevice
filling the peeling paint
with glistening honey dew
It discovers every concealed flaw
but rather than exposing it,
to harsh judgement
it transforms it
lighting the room on fire
Nov 1, 2018
Nov 1, 2018 at 7:56 PM UTC