I never thought it would come here
maybe because I never wanted to come to realize
I always told myself
don't get attached it won't work out
but the whole
"I love you baby"
******** seemed to weigh me under
they saw were all addicted to something
u were my something
frankly I think u will be my something for a while
u left
fast
like it didn't phase u
not one bit
so now I sit
I try EVERYSINGLE night to tell myself
"your better than any boy"
and my friends say the same
but I know that's not true
I like to say it doesn't make me cry
but I guess I would be lying
to give my all to someone
just to get it handed right back
they say
we're all addicted to something
and u were my something
Jun 20, 2016
Jun 20, 2016 at 9:19 PM UTC
remember me?
I was the one who was always there
I was the light
even when reality casted darkness
remember me?
we were always inseperstble
yet somehow we have drifted so so far
remember me?
it hurts to know we used to be so close
we were always the strongest together
yet you never came back
you went away
you did not return
how selfish
for you to give your life to everyone else
just that easily
May 15, 2016
May 15, 2016 at 5:00 PM UTC
empty
it's what you feel
when you have no one
and nothing
empty
it's what you feel
when your alone
just trying hard to breathe
empty
no one
nothing
so alone
and just trying
so
hard
to breathe :)
Apr 12, 2016
Apr 12, 2016 at 3:07 PM UTC
where are you now?
when you said you would always be there
because we were bestfriends
when you say you can imagine you life not together
when you say forever and always
where are you now "bestfriends"
where are you now in this world of "always together"
where are you now when it was forever and always
where are you now
Apr 12, 2016
Apr 12, 2016 at 3:05 PM UTC
love
they say it's always easy
so fun
so easy
I say love is like.
love is like that bottle cap
that always seemed to be wayyy to tight
hard to open and hard to fight
I never expected
this love
i never expectedd to fall
I said
your better
you can do this
what happened to that?
your better
you can do this
and I never expected to fall
Apr 10, 2016
Apr 10, 2016 at 1:06 PM UTC
love
it makes me think of being thrown in the wind
flowing away slowly
as I sink deeper
I realize it's a distraction from the world around
a distraction that gave me temporary heal
a distraction that I could rely on
a distraction that I never thought I would have to move on from
nows that time
and I still try to distract myself
from this feeling
no distraction will ever be as great
as
yours
was
Mar 27, 2016
Mar 27, 2016 at 8:10 PM UTC
I never thought I would really end up here
I guess I always thought about it
I never imagined it actually happening
Falling this low
I've hit bottom
So far
So
low
Mar 27, 2016
Mar 27, 2016 at 8:04 PM UTC
1 second:
my mind drags my languid body across the tundra of insanity
my eyes focused on a space
a blurry shape focused
something in between reality and the real world
2 seconds:
roles of films show screenplays flickering across my mind, lighting up possibilities of what could go wrong
One goes by, and the film starts again running over and over
as the films play, I slowly drown in a sea of attacks
1,000 feet, my world spins
2,000 feet, my world fades
3,000 feet, my world becomes red, blocking the rest of the colors of the world
preventing the peace of the world into sight
4,000 feet, my soul mending into an entity with no right of way
it drifts upwards as I drift away
3 seconds:
my mind becomes the phantom
black, hollow, clustered, dreadful, worrisome
following my hollow body, swarming with words
creeping up behind me, people pass in blurs
their energy sweeps me up, fills me, empties me, making me feel even more alone
4 seconds:
do I cry, show the world the Prince of Darkness that clings onto my body
pulling strands of my hair, slowing my world to where I stare at myself and see a mess
see the tearing across skin, my face, only my red eyes can see, when they see my reflection
it’s a happy girl, who is never too sad, but the red can see through the mask that is always glued on
or should I **** it up and keep the beast swimming through my brain
prying my mouth open, keep it inside and let it eat me alive
5 seconds:
my heart, feeling four times as heavier as it did 6 seconds before
telling me you’re okay, it will pass, the storms almost over, the friend always there to help the in pain
even when the expression shows different
the brain, feeling four times heavier as it did 6 seconds before
telling me you’re not okay, nobody cares, see they just passed you, why would someone care?
The common enemy, the one who's always there to tear you down even when the sun shines bright
6 seconds:
to keep the phantom from attacking, breathe steadily, never miss a beat
which would you chose to believe?
The phantom, the common enemy, the one who controls your thoughts
or the friend, there to keep you running through it all?
The choice seems easy, but sometimes
the choice isn’t yours to make
Mar 1, 2016
Mar 1, 2016 at 2:43 PM UTC
It's funny, how we used to fake glare and sneer at each other in the halls
and now they're real
It's crazy, how close we used to be
and now we couldn't be further apart
It's scary, how we were best friends
and now you won't even look at me
It's weird, how we used to talk 24/7
and now we haven't spoken a word to each other
It's sad how we used to hate people together
and now we hate each other.
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 9:08 AM UTC
the feeling where you lost someone
and you don't know what to do
the feeling when your alone
and have no one to go to
the feeling where you had someone
and they simply float away
the feeling where you scared
and all they say is ok
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 8:58 AM UTC