Don't look at me like that
because I don't get you at all
I would like to call that a stare of longing
but I'd be lying to myself
Funny how my mind thinks your eyes speak love
when my heart is the one falling
Apr 30, 2017
Apr 30, 2017 at 1:12 PM UTC
I must be stupid
I must have lost my mind
There's a space in my hollow head where you walk around
Banging on the walls and the door
You talk to me through the vents manipulating my feelings
I may be smart enough to know I don't love you
But I must be stupid to keep you up there.
Apr 30, 2017
Apr 30, 2017 at 1:08 PM UTC
I am currently alone but I keep on thinking "leave me alone"
I am so ******* sad
I don't even know why
I sound like a whiny teenager
I need this to be over
I've been feeling this non-feeling for years now
I don't use the word depressed
because my feelings seems so shallow to be diagnosed as something so real and heavy.
I tell myself that a lot.
I compare my pain to other people's pain and I feel like I don't have the right to be depressed.
I know it's a bad thing to do.
And one thing is, I can never harm myself much less push myself on the verge of death
But I think about it almost every day
Whenever I am allowed to think
I think dangerous thoughts
I think about thinking of dying
I know I'll never do it
but somehow I still wonder
what if
what if
what if
Apr 19, 2017
Apr 19, 2017 at 1:20 PM UTC
Hello, it's been a while but I still find myself stuck in the same old, same old.
It's been a while but I still find myself wishing for the same thing over and over again.
It's been a while but I still find myself repeat, repeating the same mistakes.
It's been a while but I still feel the same.
It's been a while, nothing changed, you're still a million miles away.
Apr 19, 2017
Apr 19, 2017 at 12:51 PM UTC
I want to write poems that move mountains and pinch hearts
But I am just a silly girl
Who loves to daydream and not try at all
So ******* hopeless
Always staring far away
Head in the clouds
And there I go again
Sailing through the endless stream of clouds
And I wonder why am I here again
and how did I get here
Oh what was it I was talking about?
Apr 19, 2017
Apr 19, 2017 at 12:45 PM UTC
The year is almost ending
oh how fast 2016 had been
It almost seems like everything is still the same
Yet a lot of things are different
I haven't written anything for months
and now I feel like a bucket filled with
water from a faucet streaming more,
overflowing and have nowhere else to
go but wherever the ground leads it.
I've been through a lot
Yet still not enough
My mind is filled with thoughts
Yet my heart still feels empty
What a year, this year has been.
Dec 28, 2016
Dec 28, 2016 at 11:43 AM UTC
I wonder what would it be like when I die
Would I be just another thing to be sorry about and forgotten in a week?
Will they uncover my secrets?
Will they see me in a different light?
Or will it never matter?
Just another face
Just another name
buried on the ground
Feb 29, 2016
Feb 29, 2016 at 1:52 PM UTC
I know I'm almost getting over you
when I stopped thinking about you
in broad daylight
but when nighttime creeps
and the moon casts it's light upon my window
I think of you again
and how awful it had been to lose you
when I don't even have you in the first place
I think about the way I felt back then
and will I ever feel that way again
for anybody other than you
I try to close my eyes and drift my thoughts to the future
but I only sink further into this black hole in my mind
and now I can't sleep
and my mistakes haunt me
I know I'd be fine in the morning
Funny how the light gives me the impression that I can be new
when every night I am the same old mess
Jan 16, 2016
Jan 16, 2016 at 2:59 PM UTC
Why does it seem like everything will be easier if I just close my eyes?
I could but my mind won't let me
It creeps up thoughts late at night
to make me anxious
crippling with a headache
not wanting to sleep
but I have to
I feel nauseous
my brain is throbbing like crazy
sleep won't set in
and I'm going mad
but even if I sleep
the nightmares are there
not wanting me to wake up
Dec 20, 2015
Dec 20, 2015 at 12:56 PM UTC
Words are just words, they say.
It can't break a bone, they say.
But it can break far more than just a bone
It can break relationships and it can break your heart over and over again
Dec 20, 2015
Dec 20, 2015 at 10:47 AM UTC