All I wanted was happiness
I tried to find it in anything
And I found it
In bad desicions
In despair
That happiness was not a real one
It was only a mask, a cheap happiness
That lasts for an hour or so
Until you need more
It comes in many forms
From powder to liquid
But in reality it is not worth it
Cheap happiness
Destroys even the smallest bit of hope
You have in yourself
Sep 26, 2025
Sep 26, 2025 at 3:15 AM UTC
Tell me this is not the end
I don't want things to end this way
My hands are numb
I am losing breath
Panic attack
Getts in my way
I am spiraling
My emotions all around
Somehow it feels like the end
But it is just another nightmare night
And tomorrow will be another shiny day
Until the night falls down again
Apr 2, 2025
Apr 2, 2025 at 1:29 AM UTC
Walking around the places
All I see are blurry faces
Am I out of my mind?
Because I do not feel real
Body and soul are saparated
I am levitating above my body
I do not feel alive anymore
Feb 16, 2025
Feb 16, 2025 at 5:01 AM UTC
Thoughts racing
Pupils dilated
Put on my eyeliner
On ****** eyes
No sleep for nights
Red lipstick
Sweet smell of parfume
To cover the smoke
Sun shines on my pale skin
My whole body shaking
And then I realise
And then I greet
Another manic episode
Feb 15, 2025
Feb 15, 2025 at 5:27 AM UTC
I became an addict at such a young age
I just wanted to numb the pain
Calling doctor every week or so
For a new prescription
Lying to my family that I am fine
Tears and sweat soaking my shirt
Flashbacks become alive
Withdrawals make it worse
I just need to survive another night
Through this burning hole
Feb 12, 2025
Feb 12, 2025 at 4:28 AM UTC
I am falling apart
Into tiny little pieces
Like when a glass shatters
You cannot fix it
I am falling apart
And you cannot fix me
I am so tired
I am so drowned out by my thoughts
And then I ask myself
Where were you when I needed you
You choose everyone else
I was always your last choice
Your lies were so soft so easy to believe in
At first
Then you just kept breaking me
And now
I am dissapearing like a ghost
Feb 11, 2025
Feb 11, 2025 at 2:45 AM UTC
Show me all your scars and bruises
I want to know your story
Did anyone prepare you for life?
Do you sleep at night?
What do you dream of?
Who did this to you and why?
Can you handle it?
Will you be able to hold on?
Tell me all your stories
I want to know how much we can handle
Did someone take your inner child away?
Did you make someones soul die?
Did you make your own soul die?
Are you scared of life?
Tell me all
How do you feel?
Tell me about love, God and life
I wonder when my time will come
What will be mine last exit
Feb 10, 2025
Feb 10, 2025 at 1:33 PM UTC
I fake a smile
And everyone is happy
I fake a laugh
And they laugh with me
I am so tired of having a mask
Underneath a mask
At the night I take every mask off
Smile turns into frown
Laugh turns into a scream
Shiny eyes turn into ****** red ones
Feb 9, 2025
Feb 9, 2025 at 4:02 AM UTC
Where were you
When I was at my lowest
Love me when I am happy
Hate me when I am sad
I miss you
But I don't need you
Feb 5, 2025
Feb 5, 2025 at 3:39 AM UTC
Trying to figure out my purpose
I can not name one thing
Nohing on my mind
Just these voices screaming
Making me an empty shell
What is life for me?
Do I have any in me left?
Child inside of me died
Long time ago
When men put their hands
Where they don't belong
Child died inside of me
When pills became only source
Child died inside of me
When voices became loud
Child died inside of me
When door started to scream
And bugs crawled all over my skin
Oct 29, 2024
Oct 29, 2024 at 2:22 PM UTC