everyday-1 - Hello Poetry

CHRISTIAN My normal afternoon and i was doing what i did best, Stressing! Stressing about if this child would make it, stressing if he would deny being the father, stressing about how daddy would take this, stressing about why am i stressing , stressing about things i thought were impossible and i guess that kind of energy is what made me loose you. I decided to try get my mind off the stressing and do something productive, like reading a book. The MAGIC page 3 was the introduction. I couldnt even understand what the hell the auther spoke about because my head was stuck on the stressing. My mind was busy replaying you saying that you don't know what we are going to about the child. I couldn't stop fearing you running or denying this pregnancy and yes how much suicide crossed my mind a few times, i figured if we were both dead, id save you a lot of trouble since you "didnt know" what do. **** How i feel stupid right now for thinking about such. Suddenly i started feeling hot, the temperature was just irritating my skin. I thought maybe i am just being dramatic, because I didnt want to draw attention to myself and end up explain to my parents that i am pregnant i decided to take quick nap. Laying on the peacefully greatful the temprature dropped, i suddenly felt as if i was being stabbed several times on my tummy. Crawling to my jacket, trying my best not to cause any scene, i sent you a text, luckily you responded. As i stood up i saw blood coming out, i rushed out to meet up with you and tears just started falling. The confusion,the pain and all i could think about was "God please don't let this baby die". You held me and told me everything will be alright. When i arrived home, i had to confess, tell the truth in order to save this child. He dad was torn however he rushed me to the hospital. It was too late.... I died for a second, ran out of breath, my entire world shut down and i thought maybe if i wasn't so negative about him he would've survived, until this present day, i can't help but wonder what would you look like. Maybe if we fought less and accepted you, things could've been better.

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Oct 1, 2018

Oct 1, 2018 at 12:42 PM UTC

everyday-1

Christian

CHRISTIAN My normal afternoon and i was doing what i did best, Stressing! Stressing about if this child would make it, stressing if he would deny being the father, stressing about how daddy would take this, stressing about why am i stressing , stressing about things i thought were impossible and i guess that kind of energy is what made me loose you. I decided to try get my mind off the stressing and do something productive, like reading a book. The MAGIC page 3 was the introduction. I couldnt even understand what the hell the auther spoke about because my head was stuck on the stressing. My mind was busy replaying you saying that you don't know what we are going to about the child. I couldn't stop fearing you running or denying this pregnancy and yes how much suicide crossed my mind a few times, i figured if we were both dead, id save you a lot of trouble since you "didnt know" what do. **** How i feel stupid right now for thinking about such. Suddenly i started feeling hot, the temperature was just irritating my skin. I thought maybe i am just being dramatic, because I didnt want to draw attention to myself and end up explain to my parents that i am pregnant i decided to take quick nap. Laying on the peacefully greatful the temprature dropped, i suddenly felt as if i was being stabbed several times on my tummy. Crawling to my jacket, trying my best not to cause any scene, i sent you a text, luckily you responded. As i stood up i saw blood coming out, i rushed out to meet up with you and tears just started falling. The confusion,the pain and all i could think about was "God please don't let this baby die". You held me and told me everything will be alright. When i arrived home, i had to confess, tell the truth in order to save this child. He dad was torn however he rushed me to the hospital. It was too late.... I died for a second, ran out of breath, my entire world shut down and i thought maybe if i wasn't so negative about him he would've survived, until this present day, i can't help but wonder what would you look like. Maybe if we fought less and accepted you, things could've been better.

13

I know I am expected to cry now that you're gone however i am happy Aunty because you've seen me and groomed me into this wonderful lady i am right now and Thank You for the smiles we've shared,also for the one's you were responsible for. I may be heart broken a bit because you never got to see me get married nor see my future babies however i am glad i have a Guardian Angel in heaven now who will watch over them once they're born. I bet you're having so much fun up there

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Aug 28, 2018

Aug 28, 2018 at 8:10 AM UTC

everyday-1

To Aunty D

I know I am expected to cry now that you're gone however i am happy Aunty because you've seen me and groomed me into this wonderful lady i am right now and Thank You for the smiles we've shared,also for the one's you were responsible for. I may be heart broken a bit because you never got to see me get married nor see my future babies however i am glad i have a Guardian Angel in heaven now who will watch over them once they're born. I bet you're having so much fun up there

1

Despite the screaming in my head, the tears in my eyes "I'm fine..." Is what I said "I'll be there in a few minutes..." Then I put down the phone and ran into the street My suicide "An accident" they'll never say nor see that this was the perfect plan. I forced myself to pretend that everything is okay and that i am my normal self, however deep down i was burning with pain,anger,sadness,hate and FEAR. The fear of heading back to the same hole where my brokenness began. Home was the last place I'd hope to be. You used my thighs to warm up your body, my tears to freshen up from your hectic day, my face a punching bag to let out all your frustrations, My virginity to feel like a man and **** to feel control once more My weakness was your strength My tears were your joy And I.. I.... I was left to pick up my broken self I was left to deal with the depression by myself I.. I was broken to no point of return!

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Aug 16, 2018

Aug 16, 2018 at 4:51 AM UTC

everyday-1

No point of return

Despite the screaming in my head, the tears in my eyes "I'm fine..." Is what I said "I'll be there in a few minutes..." Then I put down the phone and ran into the street My suicide "An accident" they'll never say nor see that this was the perfect plan. I forced myself to pretend that everything is okay and that i am my normal self, however deep down i was burning with pain,anger,sadness,hate and FEAR. The fear of heading back to the same hole where my brokenness began. Home was the last place I'd hope to be. You used my thighs to warm up your body, my tears to freshen up from your hectic day, my face a punching bag to let out all your frustrations, My virginity to feel like a man and **** to feel control once more My weakness was your strength My tears were your joy And I.. I.... I was left to pick up my broken self I was left to deal with the depression by myself I.. I was broken to no point of return!

21

It all started with the usual He dumps you, you hurt, days pass by you start stalking his WhatsApp profile... He's online but Oh my word!! he doesn't text you.. It hurts, you think lemme fight for him one last time, boom he ignores your text. Blue ticks, 2hours no reply You hurt to such point that you talk to anyone but how you feel, you feel your friends aren't there for you, the only advice they giving is "let him go" as if it's that easy... Your insecurity starts to raise insanely You try to stalk his Facebook wall, he isn't there, he blocked you. You feel he owes you an explanation of why would he dumped you, Then Boom!! He has another girl as his WhatsApp profile pic. It hurts, why would he move on just like that? Was I really worth it? I guess not! He's blind, it's his loss You lose self-confidence, crying yourself to sleep... This is the same guy who told you that he's nothing like your ex's this is the same guy who pretended to love you when he really didn't. It hurt, you could feel like your heart is up on your throat and it's choking you SaD isn't it? This is my poem called "Teach me not to love you" Come let's take it slow Don't be nervous I'm not trying to get you back Let's start with the basics Hate each other Be enemies and try to ruin each Others lives Then become friends moved by the thought Of being "exes" Let me see her please let me Meet the perfect woman I helped you Prepare for, let me meet her And enlighten her on how to walk this path with you Teach me not to love you So that I can prepare for my better half And soul mate, help me rectify What I did to make you walk out Of my life Tell me what I did wrong and what I Did not do to make you walk out of me My heart is aching yet the ache is not For you but it is the thought That hurts, thinking I wasted my time On a what once was situation The ache hurts so bad yet I wouldn't give you the pleasure Of sharing a single tear for you You are not even worth a thought from me I would never **** myself for you Because you are not worth Even a glance from me Let's not live in vain yet let's help Each so that our present relationships May Work out Come! Meet the man who picked Me up when you tossed me away like A piece of waste Yet a wise woman once said "One man's trash is another's treasure" I bet you've forgotten all the promises You made! Funny how you never even bothered to keep even one of 'em Yet let's leave that for another day And leave the past in the past and focus of the present If we could be different we could be envy, angry, resentful, presumed with hatred. Life's too short to be holding grudges All the insults and every single thing you Said after that breakup trust me I remember yet I hope you've stopped being a coward and started taking the blames for your own fvckUp Don't leave her miserable like you did to me My name is Ruth and I've learned to stop loving you

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Aug 7, 2018

Aug 7, 2018 at 10:20 AM UTC

everyday-1

TEACH ME NOT TO LOVE YOU

It all started with the usual He dumps you, you hurt, days pass by you start stalking his WhatsApp profile... He's online but Oh my word!! he doesn't text you.. It hurts, you think lemme fight for him one last time, boom he ignores your text. Blue ticks, 2hours no reply You hurt to such point that you talk to anyone but how you feel, you feel your friends aren't there for you, the only advice they giving is "let him go" as if it's that easy... Your insecurity starts to raise insanely You try to stalk his Facebook wall, he isn't there, he blocked you. You feel he owes you an explanation of why would he dumped you, Then Boom!! He has another girl as his WhatsApp profile pic. It hurts, why would he move on just like that? Was I really worth it? I guess not! He's blind, it's his loss You lose self-confidence, crying yourself to sleep... This is the same guy who told you that he's nothing like your ex's this is the same guy who pretended to love you when he really didn't. It hurt, you could feel like your heart is up on your throat and it's choking you SaD isn't it? This is my poem called "Teach me not to love you" Come let's take it slow Don't be nervous I'm not trying to get you back Let's start with the basics Hate each other Be enemies and try to ruin each Others lives Then become friends moved by the thought Of being "exes" Let me see her please let me Meet the perfect woman I helped you Prepare for, let me meet her And enlighten her on how to walk this path with you Teach me not to love you So that I can prepare for my better half And soul mate, help me rectify What I did to make you walk out Of my life Tell me what I did wrong and what I Did not do to make you walk out of me My heart is aching yet the ache is not For you but it is the thought That hurts, thinking I wasted my time On a what once was situation The ache hurts so bad yet I wouldn't give you the pleasure Of sharing a single tear for you You are not even worth a thought from me I would never **** myself for you Because you are not worth Even a glance from me Let's not live in vain yet let's help Each so that our present relationships May Work out Come! Meet the man who picked Me up when you tossed me away like A piece of waste Yet a wise woman once said "One man's trash is another's treasure" I bet you've forgotten all the promises You made! Funny how you never even bothered to keep even one of 'em Yet let's leave that for another day And leave the past in the past and focus of the present If we could be different we could be envy, angry, resentful, presumed with hatred. Life's too short to be holding grudges All the insults and every single thing you Said after that breakup trust me I remember yet I hope you've stopped being a coward and started taking the blames for your own fvckUp Don't leave her miserable like you did to me My name is Ruth and I've learned to stop loving you

62

BEFORE YOU HELD ME I WAS A MESS YOU MOULDED ME INTO A MASTERPIECE YOUR HEART GAVE ME PEACE I NOW KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE APPRECIATED IN THIS LIFE HOW TO APPRECIATE LIFE THE WAY IT IS WE WERE STUCK BETWEEN SPACE & REALITY EVERY SECOND YOUR HEART POUNDED FOR MINE YOU WERE ASSIGNED TO ME BY THE UNIVERS YOU LOVED ME UNCONDITIONALLY I CHANGED... YOU REMAINED THE SAME.... WHEN WE LOST OUR BABY I GOT SHADY AND TOO DARK HOWEVER, YOU REMAINED THE SAME FAMILIAR PLACE WHERE I COULD FIND PEACE I PUSHED AWAY EVERY SINGLE FORCE IN MY PATH YET YOU WERE STILL THE MORNING GLORY OF EACH DAY I LOVE YOU ILOVEYOU SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU APPRECIATE THE FLAWS WHICH I MYSELF CANT STAND YOU SEEK EVERY SINGLE POSITIVITY IN THE NEGATIVE I WOULD SOUND WEAK PLEADING YOU TO NEVER LEAVE HOWEVER, YOUVE SEEN ME AT MY WEAKEST AND I WOULDNT HAVE CHOSEN ANYONE BUT YOU TO WALK MW THROUGH IT I AM NOT PERFECT I **** AT LOVING I SHUT YOU OUT ALL THE TIME YET YOU STILL FIND YOUR WAY BACK INTO MY HEART I LIVE TODAY & TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED TO ANYONE I WILL LOVE YOU NOW LIKE I AM LOSING YOU TOMORROW I WORRY ABOUT YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE THE SOURCE OF MY HAPPINESS I FOUND A LIVING LEGEND OF LOVE IN, TO KEEP ME MOTIVATED AND YET STILL YOU NEVER COMPLAINED I DO NOT WANT TO LIVE THIS LIFE IF ITS NOT WITH YOU I APPRECIATE YOU ILOVEYOU

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Aug 7, 2018

Aug 7, 2018 at 9:22 AM UTC

everyday-1

HIS HEART

BEFORE YOU HELD ME I WAS A MESS YOU MOULDED ME INTO A MASTERPIECE YOUR HEART GAVE ME PEACE I NOW KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE APPRECIATED IN THIS LIFE HOW TO APPRECIATE LIFE THE WAY IT IS WE WERE STUCK BETWEEN SPACE & REALITY EVERY SECOND YOUR HEART POUNDED FOR MINE YOU WERE ASSIGNED TO ME BY THE UNIVERS YOU LOVED ME UNCONDITIONALLY I CHANGED... YOU REMAINED THE SAME.... WHEN WE LOST OUR BABY I GOT SHADY AND TOO DARK HOWEVER, YOU REMAINED THE SAME FAMILIAR PLACE WHERE I COULD FIND PEACE I PUSHED AWAY EVERY SINGLE FORCE IN MY PATH YET YOU WERE STILL THE MORNING GLORY OF EACH DAY I LOVE YOU ILOVEYOU SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU APPRECIATE THE FLAWS WHICH I MYSELF CANT STAND YOU SEEK EVERY SINGLE POSITIVITY IN THE NEGATIVE I WOULD SOUND WEAK PLEADING YOU TO NEVER LEAVE HOWEVER, YOUVE SEEN ME AT MY WEAKEST AND I WOULDNT HAVE CHOSEN ANYONE BUT YOU TO WALK MW THROUGH IT I AM NOT PERFECT I **** AT LOVING I SHUT YOU OUT ALL THE TIME YET YOU STILL FIND YOUR WAY BACK INTO MY HEART I LIVE TODAY & TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED TO ANYONE I WILL LOVE YOU NOW LIKE I AM LOSING YOU TOMORROW I WORRY ABOUT YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE THE SOURCE OF MY HAPPINESS I FOUND A LIVING LEGEND OF LOVE IN, TO KEEP ME MOTIVATED AND YET STILL YOU NEVER COMPLAINED I DO NOT WANT TO LIVE THIS LIFE IF ITS NOT WITH YOU I APPRECIATE YOU ILOVEYOU

33

HOW DARE YOU HOW DARE YOU STRIP ME OFF MY INNOCENCE HOW DARE YOU BETRAY MY TRUST FOR YOU HOW DARE YOU ROB ME OFF A ROLE MODEL HOW DARE YOU ROB ME OFF A MENTOR YOU MADE ME A VICTIM NO MAKEUP CAN COVER THE SCARS YOU LEFT ON ME WHO THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO CONFINED IN ABOUT MY PROBLEMS? WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO SEEK ADVICE FROM? YOU ROBBED ME OFF A BROTHER YOU ROBBED ME OFF A CHANCE OF BEING GREAT YOU MADE ME A VICTIM YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT ME FROM THE VULTURES OUT THERE, HOWEVER, YOU BECAME ONE YOURSELF YOU STOLE MY CONFIDENCE NOW EVERY MAN THAT APPROACHES IS A THREAT TO MY INNOCENCE WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL MY FUTURE SELF? HOW AM I GOING TO EXPLAIN TO HER WHY AM I NOT MARRIED NOR HAVE ANY KIDS? YOU ROBBED ME OFF A WONDERFUL FAMILY NOW I SEAT AND WATCH AS YOU ENJOY LIFE I SEE YOU'RE HAPPY WITH HER DOE SHE KNOW YOU GO AROUND BETRAYING, HURTING AND RAPPING YOUR SISTER? OR TO HER YOU'RE THE SWEET BROTHER I ONCE KNEW? I HOPE ALL THIS WAS WORTH IT..................

0

Aug 7, 2018

Aug 7, 2018 at 8:59 AM UTC

everyday-1

VICTIM

HOW DARE YOU HOW DARE YOU STRIP ME OFF MY INNOCENCE HOW DARE YOU BETRAY MY TRUST FOR YOU HOW DARE YOU ROB ME OFF A ROLE MODEL HOW DARE YOU ROB ME OFF A MENTOR YOU MADE ME A VICTIM NO MAKEUP CAN COVER THE SCARS YOU LEFT ON ME WHO THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO CONFINED IN ABOUT MY PROBLEMS? WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO SEEK ADVICE FROM? YOU ROBBED ME OFF A BROTHER YOU ROBBED ME OFF A CHANCE OF BEING GREAT YOU MADE ME A VICTIM YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT ME FROM THE VULTURES OUT THERE, HOWEVER, YOU BECAME ONE YOURSELF YOU STOLE MY CONFIDENCE NOW EVERY MAN THAT APPROACHES IS A THREAT TO MY INNOCENCE WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL MY FUTURE SELF? HOW AM I GOING TO EXPLAIN TO HER WHY AM I NOT MARRIED NOR HAVE ANY KIDS? YOU ROBBED ME OFF A WONDERFUL FAMILY NOW I SEAT AND WATCH AS YOU ENJOY LIFE I SEE YOU'RE HAPPY WITH HER DOE SHE KNOW YOU GO AROUND BETRAYING, HURTING AND RAPPING YOUR SISTER? OR TO HER YOU'RE THE SWEET BROTHER I ONCE KNEW? I HOPE ALL THIS WAS WORTH IT..................

23