Dear Guitar,
In the 6 years we've been together, I never thought you would grow to mean so much to me. When I first saw you, I knew you were the perfect addition to my life. There were so many other guitars I could have chosen, but your dark-stained tiger maple surface caught my eye. I was excited to take you home and make music with you until the sun went down.
Your hollow body and smooth curves fit so perfectly in my arms, and I cannot describe how amazing you look when the sun shines on your brilliant strings. When I played you for the first time, I was inexperienced, so I don’t blame you if you didn't enjoy it. But I admire you for bearing with me as I've learned more about you and how to take care of you.
I've been through a lot in my life, both positive and negative. You were always there for me when I needed something to take my mind off of things. I remember when I got into an argument, I went into my room feeling angry and upset. Then, I picked you up and the gentleness of your tone took my heart to a more peaceful place. Your sweet melodies always comfort me and help my mind to dwell on better things.
I enjoy the late nights we spend together, perfecting songs until my fingers are sore. I love falling asleep with the sound of your soothing melodies filling my mind, and waking up to the sight of you hanging on my bedroom wall. I love the different voices you have; gentle when I need them to be, loud and playful when I feel energetic. You express my feelings in ways that I never could on my own. I will always remember the fun we've had together and hope to have you in my life for all time.
I will cherish you forever,
Katie Skarr
Jan 14, 2014
Jan 14, 2014 at 9:25 PM UTC
As the cold tears run down my cheek,
I think of what it could be like
if we were all happy and got along for once.
I don't want it to be like this
and I know you don't either,
but nobody is willing to change...
Oct 15, 2013
Oct 15, 2013 at 2:29 AM UTC
Thank you,
For always letting anger get the best of you.
Thank you,
For being such a ********* ****
Thank you,
For never thinking before you act.
Thank you ,
For repeating all your stupid mistakes.
Thank you,
For letting everyone, including yourself, down.
For breaking promises…
Thank you,
For never learning how to stand back up.
Thank you,
For getting hurt when you fall.
Thank you,
For only caring about yourself.
Thank you,
For being extremely sensitive.
Thank you,
For pushing everyone away.
Thanks so much,
For nothing…
Jul 24, 2013
Jul 24, 2013 at 1:52 AM UTC
Why do you have to constantly argue with me?
Why do you have to always be right?
It’s okay to be wrong once in a while
No one is perfect.
Why does everything I say have to turn
Into such a hostile situation?
I hope you know it’s the reason
I never speak
Because every time I do I just get yelled at.
I can’t let one sentence escape my mouth
Without it offending you in some way
Or being 'disrespectful'.
Is it you? Or me….
I thought I knew how to be nice
I thought I knew what to say
I thought I knew why I got in trouble
But I can’t tell anymore.
I just want to help but I can’t
Because when I do it makes matters
Worse than they already are
At least, in your eyes it does.
I don’t see the way you do
I don’t think the way you do
Yet you still expect me to do
Everything your way.
Jul 7, 2013
Jul 7, 2013 at 3:19 AM UTC
This isn't a poem but I just wanted to share it. There is a poem at the end however.
Chapter 1: Kenzi
The room is dim. The only light emanating from the small desk lamp in the corner.
*“Unhappy with the life I'm living,
Not finding anything to
Wash my ***** slate of emotions
And to keep me from crying.
Nothing to turn to when I cannot
Take anymore of this pain.
Each tiring day I 'm getting thrown
Deeper into the rainstorm.
Trying to find a peaceful way to
Escape contention and get
Away from this life I hate. I
Refuse to cry anymore.
Sunshine doesn't stay with me for long.”*
A poem I once wrote. The words ran through my head like a melody.
As I rummage through disorganized desk drawers, I search for a paper and pen. After glancing at the time on my cell phone, 2:11 AM, I begin to write:
“Dear—“
...dear who?...
*“—Everyone,
If you are reading this—“*
...what do I say in a note like this?...
*“—it means that I've finally released myself from this painful world. I'm
sorry for any heartache that I have caused you and I want you to know
that I love you more than anything. Once again, I'm sorry...I'm sorry I left
like this.
Kenzi Mullberry ”*
After signing the letter I just sat there, staring contemplatively at the paper.
...am I really going to do this?...
I looked the time again, 2:25. I usually hear the train roll by around 3.
After carefully folding the paper into thirds, I laid it on my bed.
...I hope they see it here...
Peeking out, I slowly opened my bedroom door.
CREEEAAAAK
I froze, listening... All quiet. Cautiously creeping down the carpeted stairs I let out a deep breath of air and arrived at the front entrance. Then, hesitantly, unlocked the door and stepped outside. Standing in the cold night air, I scanned the empty street. Then finally took a deep breath, and started walking.
My thoughts quickly drifted to Adam, my boyfriend.
...would my family tell him about the note? I don't want him to worry...
I took out my cell phone and typed up a text. Staring at the words, a tear rolled down my face. SEND
I checked the time again before putting the phone back into my pocket, 2:43.
...I'd better hurry...
Picking up my pace, I wiped my eyes and then shoved my hands into my sweatshirt pocket.
It was crisply cold out and my pale nose was red and running. A quick shiver ran through my body as the chilled breeze whispered past my ears and fluttered my dark brown hair. I looked up at a car traveling across the freeway overpass. It's surprising that there are still people driving this early in the morning. It's like that saying, "The city never sleeps."
There wasn't a sidewalk on this road so I stayed on the grass, even though there were no cars in sight. I looked to my right as I passed the canal, dry and empty. The irrigation water has been turned off for the winter.
Slowing down, I approached the crossing and my eyes examined the rail line. I could hear the train getting closer. I stepped onto the tracks and could feel them shaking beneath my feet. The train was getting closer and I started to panic as the bright headlight grew and I heard the horn.
...no. I have to do this...
I closed my eyes, embraced myself, clenching my teeth and my frozen fists.
”I'm sorry...”
Chapter 2: Adam
Music ran through my ears.
“...I miss you and it still feels like I know you
I've got pictures of us side by side to show you
But it feels like I owe you so much more
And you will always be perfect
You'll always be beautiful
Our hearts will never forget you
You didn't belong here
And it's become so clear
Why heaven called your name
And it just doesn't seem right, was it really your time?
Are we dreaming?
We'll never let go of you
Wish you were here but it's becoming clear
That Earth's just not the place for an angel like you...”
BZZZZZZ
I paused the music and looked down from the bright laptop screen, picking up the bottom corner of my pillow to reveal my phone.
* 1 MESSAGE:
Kenzi*
“Huh, what's she doing up so late?” I thought, as I waited for the text to open.
*Hey babe. i...im sorry...i know i'm about to
break ur heart, but i just cant take it anymore.
When you wake up and see this, i'll be gone...
I Love You Adam <3 im sorry...*
“What?”
I re-read the text...
“Kenzi! You idiot–“
I jumped out of bed and threw on my jacket as I burst out of my bedroom and around the corner to the front door. I quickly slipped my shoes on and bolted out, not caring if I disturbed the others sleeping in the house. I had to stop her.
I sprinted across the driveway, knowing exactly where she was going.
She had talked about it so many times before, she'd say, “Adam, I'm so depressed I wish I could get hit by a train.” She'd pretend it was a joke, but I always knew she was being literal.
The air was cold and thin, making my throat dry so it was hard to breathe. I heard the train whistle.
********* Kenzi...”
I strained to make my legs move faster, they were burning.
After cutting through the park, I passed the cemetery.
“Don't end up there k?...not yet...”
My shoes we're untied, due to my rush out the door, and I stumbled, but regained my balance. All I could think about was running. I could hear the train rumble as I turned the corner and the tracks came into view. I saw her.
“Kenzi!...Kenzi get off!” I was breathing hard and my face stung from the cold. “Kenzi!”
I saw the headlight and knew I wouldn't reach her in time. But I kept running.
CLICK-CLACK CLICK-CLACK CLICK-CLACK TOOOOOOOOT
I finally stopped 10 feet from the tracks. Raising my hands to my head, I grabbed my hair, then threw my arms back down and placed my hands on my knees as I caught my breath.
“Kenzi...you...stupid...” I softly spoke, I could feel tears creeping out of my eyes.
The end of the train finally passed and I jogged over to the tracks. Her body was on the ground, limp; lifeless.
...I can't believe she actually did it...
I bowed my head and closed my eyes, taking in a deep breath of air, then gazed up at the sky in discouragement.
...why did she have to–…
-----------------------------------------------------
*He looks into her motionless blood-shot eyes,
and sees something he hasn't seen in years.
A pain so deep, it's stitched into her skin,
leaving dark scars she knew would never fade.
He wants to help, but can no longer feel
The life that once ran through her veins.
The cold has taken over her weakened soul
and left it in the troubling dark of her mind.
She can no longer see, no longer taste
The endless joys they once together shared.
In a world full of happiness and sun
Were only memories of things left behind.
She couldn't see, didn't want to feel, the light
that was softly beckoning her away.
And now he stares at her in a state of something
He knew he could never bare the thought of.
As he kneels beside her he plainly whispers,
“This heart wasn't made for suicide...”*
Feb 17, 2013
Feb 17, 2013 at 12:10 AM UTC
Somewhere deep inside,
There’s a place where you reside.
A place of peace and rest.
A place to run to when I'm stressed.
But I've been caught blind,
Because I can't seem to find
A place to call my home.
Why am I feeling so alone?
This chaotic life
Has given me so much strife.
I want to feel your love
Washing down on me from above.
Feb 17, 2013
Feb 17, 2013 at 12:05 AM UTC
Hungry
but don't know what to eat
Thirsty
There's nothing left to drink
Cold
Nothing to warm my soul
Tired
Nowhere to lay my skull
Everything's changed
Everything's lost
Broken
Dark
Love
Is nowhere to be found
Friends
Have gone without a sound
Please
Oh God won't you send
Warmth
I fear this is the end
Feb 17, 2013
Feb 17, 2013 at 12:02 AM UTC
(freewrite- unedited)
What is love?
Baby don't hurt me,
don't hurt me no more.
I cant take the pain,
cant take these games,
And I know
that you don't want me.
You don't want me no more.
So stop saying sorry.
I don't want see your name
on my phones display no more,
it hurts me
and takes me back to what we had.
I know I cant have you
and it hurts,
so baby don't hurt me,
don't hurt me no more.
I cant take the pain,
cant take these games.
Why couldn't you tell me
what I did wrong
instead of just ending it
like a dropped bomb.
'Cause baby that hurt me
and I don't want to be hurt no more...
Feb 17, 2013
Feb 17, 2013 at 12:01 AM UTC
Let's start over
Begin a new life
Take it all back
Throw it all behind
Let's start over
Take away the pain
Get away from it all
I want to start again.
Feb 16, 2013
Feb 16, 2013 at 11:55 PM UTC
Lost in the noise
Of this chaotic world
Tired of this life
I just can't ignore
The silent screams
Of the broken souls
They fill my head
Give my heart sores
Why does this life
Have to be so broken?
I can't seem to find
A single place of peace
Feb 16, 2013
Feb 16, 2013 at 11:55 PM UTC