Someone just said something about me,
It’s starting to drive me crazy,
Oh please don’t make it start again,
This isn’t a feeling that can be supported by any men,
My thoughts are beginning to race,
At much too fast of a pace,
I keep trying to make it stop,
I can already feel myself drop,
It’s called anxiety,
Oh there goes gravity,
Here comes insanity,
And everyone’s pity,
I’m starting to lose control,
I can’t feel myself as a whole,
I need help,
I need help,
Here we go again,
I can’t wait for,
The moment when,
My head stops its own war,
It’s called anxiety,
It’s not ending anytime now,
It’s being juged in our society,
It’s not something we should allow,
It’s called anxiety,
Oh there goes gravity,
Here comes insanity,
And everyone’s pity
Jan 17, 2015
Jan 17, 2015 at 2:01 AM UTC
Language, anguish
Wrapped myself in blankets
Thinkin' about girls that consider me strange-ish
Well who really cares
Givin' off looks, and creepy stares
Stalkin' and talkin'
Chills and sidewalk chalkin'
Layin' in bed with you
Makin' plans we'll never do
Pretty girl, anywhere, I'll take you to
Just wanna kiss,
And kick it too
Sleeping tonight, feels so wrong
Alone, tonight, feels so long
But you call, talkin' *****
We up till seven-thirty
You know I'm right here
Let me whisper in your ear
Let's fu- I mean make love
And then maybe, if push comes to shove
I'll let you act just like a white dove
Scheming, dreaming, it's all seeming
A little hot, but not shot
All my plans and secrets too
Cause when I'm in your bed
I'll stay lovin' you
Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 1:44 AM UTC
I wage war
That's never been seen before
Is sanity worth fighting for?
I'm not really sure
Insanity?
A calamity?
I call it individuality!
Who is Society
To create this hypocrisy?!?
It seems like such a tragedy
To waste such ingenuity
To dull the creativity
Jan 15, 2015
Jan 15, 2015 at 1:57 AM UTC
"Don't let madness corrupt you." A wise man once said, but it is impossible not to be corrupted when you're as dark as insanity itself.
Jan 15, 2015
Jan 15, 2015 at 1:57 AM UTC
Its like I'm melting,
my insides crumbling,
my pain sucoming
to the sacrifice of my emotions.
Supposedly I'm the tough, the rough one
The girl who gets punched and punches back.
But on the inside im crying dying slowly,
taking in every word you throw at me.
In order to stay whole to keep that goal,
I put up my iron walls,
protecting what already falls,
I'm gone, nothing but a shell,
left sun bleached and dead on the edge of hell.
Words aren't supposed to hurt me,
But baby what you are saying
its like acid to my brain.
Jan 15, 2015
Jan 15, 2015 at 12:32 AM UTC
They taught me to swim the same way they taught me to ride a bike.
lets see what happens when we push her down a hill, will she balance or bite through her lip?
They locked me in the closet, a suitcase, the trunk of our Toyota Corolla and a cardboard box all because I fit ;)
I walked through her room while she studied for her Calculus Final because it was the only way to get to my room (over and over for attention).
They held me down 3 at a time to play piano on my tummy while I shreked for pure joy and fun.
He gave me a boxing name on our trampoline and let me win. I ate his chocolate in her bed. They thought I was a cat licking itself under the covers.
When he came off the streets he gave me video games, Spyro, Pokemon, Zelda, and Sonic At first I didn't know we were related.
She chased me and my best friend around the house Screaming
Squeeze my buns of steal baby
he never came back.
They held me upstairs while things flew and crashed downstairs forever breaking the lemon squeezer. I cried and he held me, my first memory of him being nice.
She had me live with her 5 days a week 6 years because our parents didn't want to deal, even though she was bulimic. She took care of me but in truth I kept her alive.
They were my first memory, they were there for me, when I was little they were my parents. I jokingly tell people that all my good traits were learned from them.
When they left there was no one left to protect me. All alone, too young to understand them being gone was what made me sad. I was used to having 8 parents and now I have the two that actually gave birth to me.
Haha I say you only have 2. I gave up on them long ago, why would I pick 2 when I have 8?
Forever the 8 of us.
Apr 5, 2014
Apr 5, 2014 at 12:37 AM UTC
reckless
had Tony
extinguish a cigarette
on my flesh
left shoulder blade
took the burn
but it was painless
in turn
I'll have a mark
I cannot forget
to remind me
I wasn't always
youthless
Apr 3, 2014
Apr 3, 2014 at 7:14 PM UTC
He told me to look into a mirror and write down 10 things I saw there.
Not of the flesh, not of beauty, but the reaction one gets from one's own eyes.
What are the eyes? he asked me
In reply I looked away allowing the words to be ripped from my mouth The windows into the soul
One by one he asked me to look into each person's there, over and over asking if I could trust them.
With a laugh and a hint of sarcasm I don't trust easily
But my heart felt empty and a hug well needed,
to try and heal all those years unheeded.
I look and see his truth, to trust and love without doubt.
Have you ever gazed into your own eyes?
What did you see there,
was it things you knew or secrets you've hidden even from yourself?
Can you look into your own eyes, tell yourself that you are beautiful and mean it?
If the eyes are the windows to the soul what lays behind your shutters.
Oh lover I've been asking myself what you are hiding.
Can I look into the dark centers fading to the storm outside,
find your meaning, what you hide behind?
Can you blink and sweep away the pain hidden there?
Can you hide behind that smile so sweet?
Can you, my sweetheart, cease the flow of rain cascading down my cheeks as I try and walk away?
When will I learn
This question runs through my mind.
what is my worth
I try to find some peace of mind after flinging a towel over my mirror.
For I did not like what I found hidden there.
Apr 3, 2014
Apr 3, 2014 at 3:56 PM UTC
Baby touch me...
kiss and caress me.
Trail your fingers on my cheek
down the curve of my neck.
Across my breast,
up the hill of my hip,
over my thigh,
between my legs...
Bite me but softly,
grab my hips and pull me towards you.
Skin on skin,
Lips, together.
Bodies pressing.
Intertwined in a passionate bliss,
much like our first kiss.
You massage my back,
taking from me the pain long felt.
Yet again running,
fingers up my spine so gently,
I shiver,
Eyes closing to remember this,
this passion, content, no longer longing.
Time passes,
while your touch weakens.
Ceasing to kindle that fire,
gone, all gone,
as well as your hands
from my soft skin.
The memory of your lips.
The feel of your hips.
I sigh as I walk away now,
my choice yet it still hurts.
Remembering fondly that touch,
that caress.
Love of mine.
Think of me kindly, don't miss me.
Believe simply that we had a fire,
but the door is shut now,
cutting off the air that fead it.
Baby you've done your part,
but now its time for a new start.
Apr 3, 2014
Apr 3, 2014 at 1:18 AM UTC
Broken then broken now.
Lying on this couch reading the the textured celling.
You scream you yell more of the same.
I ran away from this in the first place,
now I'm just back in the same patterns.
You took me with open arms
promising a better life.
But now all i have are more tears and strife.
Feb 27, 2014
Feb 27, 2014 at 11:13 PM UTC