It's exactly 12 AM.
Avoiding you again.
Back to old habits.
Pushing you away when I can't do anything anymore.
When all I feel is guilt.
I try not to do it, but it's so easy to be tempted into doing old habits.
Especially the worst ones.
Sorry for all the trouble I've caused you.
You deserve better just like the rest of the ones I've pushed away.
May 17, 2015
May 17, 2015 at 12:06 AM UTC
I don't know
what it is.
I always seem to
be reeled back
to you.
Same old
feelings.
Same old
words.
Same old
hopes
that have been
broken.
Feb 17, 2015
Feb 17, 2015 at 3:23 PM UTC
If I were to tell
you how I truly
felt, would you
hold me tight
and say the same?
Or would you run
from fright
and say nothing
at all?
-S.S.
Sep 28, 2014
Sep 28, 2014 at 9:48 PM UTC
I thought I was
over the silly little butterflies.
But whenever you're near,
I could feel them fluttering around.
I could hear my own heartbeat.
I could feel it beating like crazy.
I find myself looking down
and around just to
avoid your brown eyes.
The eyes I've always adored.
Wishing I could look straight into
them without feeling anything.
Because when you're around,
I feel all the butterflies
and heartbeats x2.
- S.S.
Sep 5, 2014
Sep 5, 2014 at 11:48 PM UTC
I can't seem to focus.
All I think about
are old memories.
I can't get rid of them.
You're clogging up my mind.
I just want them
to stop.
The flashbacks,
the feelings,
everything.
I need to breathe.
Please let me breathe...
-S.S.
Sep 5, 2014
Sep 5, 2014 at 11:39 PM UTC
It's funny how I thought you
were going to be the one
who ends up hurting me,
when the person who ended up hurting me was myself.
I pushed you away when I
need you the most.
You were the only person who
could make me laugh when I was close to tears.
You were the only person who
could make me forget all my
problems.
Where are you now?
Jul 24, 2014
Jul 24, 2014 at 1:37 PM UTC
There has to be another explanation for all of this.
Please tell me the real reason.
Please tell me that you never used me.
Please tell me I wasn't a rebound.
Please tell me that i'm just over thinking all of this.
I'm not okay.
I need closure.
The right kind of closure.
Please tell me what you felt was real,
because all I feel right now is pain.
Jul 16, 2014
Jul 16, 2014 at 7:37 PM UTC
I can't move on because of you.
Nothing will ever change between us.
No matter how many times we try,
we can never remain as friends.
But maybe it's because one of us
eventually
gives up,
and usually,
it's you.
As soon as you have my hopes up,
you drop me.
As soon as things get better between us, you leave.
And I never knew why.
You're constantly going back and forth,
in and out of my life.
It drives me completely insane.
Not because you're constantly in and out of my life,
but because I let you.
No matter how big the damage is,
I always let you back in to fix it.
Even when I know you create bigger messes every time.
Jun 26, 2014
Jun 26, 2014 at 1:48 AM UTC
*We had a past. We fell for each other,
but I moved on and you should too.*
As you said those words,
I stopped everything I was doing.
I had tears streaming down my face
and I didn't even notice.
Every word stung.
But instead of me moving on,
here I am writing poems
about you...
-S.S
Jun 16, 2014
Jun 16, 2014 at 10:38 PM UTC
Do you still like him? they ask.
I don't answer.
Not because i'm scared of them judging me,
but because I wasn't exactly sure.
Well do I?
I look for you in the large crowd.
You catch me glancing at you.
I immediately look away.
I feel my face getting hot.
My heart stops.
I look back up and I see you walking
towards her.
You give her the tightest hug.
You look at me then back at her.
You hug her again.
I walk away as fast as I can.
I find myself alone and I feel it.
I feel the ache in my chest.
Of course I still like you.
There never goes a day
when I don't think about you.
-S.S.
Jun 15, 2014
Jun 15, 2014 at 2:14 PM UTC