Wait for me, my love.
Purgatory takes some time
when life is well lived.
Aug 26, 2014
Aug 26, 2014 at 9:31 AM UTC
i've shown you
the depths of me
all the crevices
and trenches
the incomplete
darks and lights
of who i am
but i don't think
you'll ever let me past
the surface
of who you are
May 13, 2014
May 13, 2014 at 4:27 PM UTC
all of the words
you speak
today and tomorrow
are in vain
for you do not wish
to throw rocks at my window,
you know very well
i am already on my doorstep
waiting for you
you love me in songs played
on tuesday afternoons,
gaps in conversation where
three words are meant to fill it
and faded journal entries
dated when time was blind
you’ve written disguised goodbyes
beneath my eyes
and subliminally (explicitly)
whispered (shouted)
to move on, move on, move on
each moment i’ve tried to draw you nearer,
you do your best to push me further away
but even from a distance,
you are still holding on
let me go
let me go
let me go
so i may finally
let go
of
you
May 13, 2014
May 13, 2014 at 4:26 PM UTC
i miss you, still
no longer in a deep, aching way,
but rather in the dull hum of my car radio
i hope you smiled today
and while you’re getting swept up
in the excitement and mystery and
passion of this confusing, intriguing,
heartbreaking, beautiful life,
i hope you never forget what is most important
i hope you remember that
it’s not about finding someone to complete
and write sappy poems about,
it’s not about listening to soft music on repeat
with your eyes closed,
wishing you were somewhere else
or someone else,
and it’s not about doing well on exams,
or traveling the world,
or always being artificial sunshine
instead of being real
because it’s okay to have sad days,
and a number in the corner of a page
can’t give you lasting satisfaction,
and you can’t be everyone’s prince charming,
and while music stirs up something
so beautiful inside of us,
you can’t hide in your melancholy world
of D minor, forever
every night i pray that you’re not lost,
that you’re somehow finding your way,
and although
i can’t speak these words to you directly,
i hope you know
i’ll always care
May 13, 2014
May 13, 2014 at 4:24 PM UTC
So often I feel as though I am seen as summer rain,
someone who does nothing but
nourishes thirsty flowers in dry soil,
precious and beautiful and unable to do any wrong
when in reality, there are unseen, hidden parts of me
and secrets I’ve only been brave enough
to whisper to a few, bits of my past
that are journal pages ripped up
and swept underneath my bed
And you are my deepest secret
I took advantage of how you felt for me
and I made you feel like you
were dirt, contaminating me because
I was innocent and perfect and could do no wrong,
but that was a lie I tried to make you believe,
because I had convinced myself
it was true, for so long
I hate that I hurt you
And I hate that I will never
be able to take that back
I cannot stand the thought of you
walking around today, or years from now
thinking of me as a mistake, a waste of time,
a thunderstorm who did nothing but uproot
such special feelings only to
destroy you in your vulnerability
But I pray you don’t think of me at all,
and that you’ve forgotten me
because I cannot stand to think
you’re out there, somewhere
remembering me as someone
who broke you.
May 13, 2014
May 13, 2014 at 4:22 PM UTC
sometimes i call your
number just for a recording
to tell me that it is
no longer i use; you’re
gone and i wish i had the
chance to speak to you
just one more time, but
i know that’s a wish i’ll
waste on shooting stars
for quite awhile
so, i’ll see you in songs and
movies that remind me of you;
old poems, the whispering
wind, and my aching heart
maybe i’ll see your face
on a crowded sidewalk
one day,
or maybe
i’ll never hear from you again
“one day”
i’m so hopeful for one day.
May 13, 2014
May 13, 2014 at 4:20 PM UTC