Last night,
A friend of a friend of someone you know
told me you planned
on buying her a ring.
And I know it's been
One Year
Seven months
Six hours
and
Forty Six minutes
since we last spoke,
But
Even the thought of you saying the words
"I love you"
To someone else is enough
to really make my heart ache.
Jan 3, 2014
Jan 3, 2014 at 2:23 AM UTC
I tend to put my whole heart into
everything I do.
I can no longer tell
if that's admirable,
or foolish.
May 31, 2013
May 31, 2013 at 1:24 AM UTC
I've been spending my days
Working on finding the balance between
Looking out for others
But also myself.
On not depending on people to make me happy
But finding comfort in the happiness of others.
I'm trying.
It's going to take time, but I really am trying.
All I can say is:
I need to know everything is going to be okay.
May 26, 2013
May 26, 2013 at 11:25 PM UTC
I'm first in line for your secondhand apologies,
but I'm never gonna hear the words that you've used so many times before.
I've been dragged through the mud so many times,
I don't think my legs know how to get up,
and my hands don't know how to brush it off my shoulder anymore.
They say you don't appreciate life until you've hit rock bottom,
because that's the best view of the top.
But what are you supposed to do
when you can't find a ladder?
May 17, 2013
May 17, 2013 at 4:59 PM UTC
I trust you with my life,
But that's about it.
May 10, 2013
May 10, 2013 at 1:26 PM UTC
I tried to send you
all of my love on paper wings,
but something got lost in translation.
I spilled my heart but ink isn't nearly as thick as blood,
so I'll have to open up my veins and let you in.
I've been standing at my window, hoping the stars don't mind me saying, they could never compare to you,
Because they remind me there is so much more, but you're here to let me know that maybe I don't need it.
I don't know where you've been, or where you're going.
But honey, I'm just as lost as you are.
And maybe you don't know who you are,
but I've been a familiar stranger to myself my whole life,
and I'm willing to try and find myself in you.
May 8, 2013
May 8, 2013 at 3:10 AM UTC
I stumbled upon your gift today.
The one I never had a chance to give to you.
It was a poignant reminder of how things were.
And I'll be the bigger person and admit:
I had a bad habit of taking and never giving,
but I think it was because you were the only person I've ever met
who had never expected anything in return,
and that felt safe to me.
It has now been six months since I've heard from you,
and I still hear your voice in my head,
your melodic way of making every word you say sound beautiful.
I'd know that voice anywhere.
And it's just starting to sink in
how much I really miss you.
And I hope,
wherever you are now,
You think of me every once and a while
and miss me too.
May 7, 2013
May 7, 2013 at 10:35 PM UTC
I thought I had it.
The way you looked at me made me believe I was close, at least.
I thought I had time.
But I guess waking up at seven to clean up last nights mess just isn't going to cut it anymore.
I thought I had nothing to worry about.
It's funny how doubt has it's ways of creeping into every corner of your brain, every thought.
I thought there were bigger problems.
But nothing hurts worse than seeing your mother cry, and knowing you put those tears there.
I thought I had you.
But I guess I shouldn't think so much.
May 6, 2013
May 6, 2013 at 5:46 PM UTC
What I would give to know what you were thinking.
To slip my way into your mind
and see myself from your eyes.
I want to know what you think when you look at me like you do.
What you feel when you blaze a trail down my arms with your fingertips.
I want to know you recurring dreams,
and nightmares alike.
If you feel as small as I do
when you look up at the night time sky.
I want to know where you go to get away from it all,
because I'd like to go there with you.
May 5, 2013
May 5, 2013 at 5:54 AM UTC
I thought I saw the future in your eyes, darling.
May 5, 2013
May 5, 2013 at 3:15 AM UTC