Looking back, it was such a dark autumn.
I couldn’t fight the voices in my head,
thinking that, I wouldn’t breathe without him,
so I held on to a dying thread.
But in this new city, my eyes see the sky differently,
& I can remember the hand that kept me from drowning.
To sum it all up, we will never truly understand His love,
but looking back, I know, He kept me close enough.
6.11.21
Jun 11, 2021
Jun 11, 2021 at 3:13 PM UTC
Way too often I look for justification of everyone’s actions in every situation, believing that evil has its own limitations and every tired soul is looking for salvation.
I’m not changing.
9.8.19
Sep 8, 2019
Sep 8, 2019 at 6:57 PM UTC
It was my fault that I was sitting all alone and you needed a moment to make yourself feel grown.
Maybe if I hadn’t looked so defenseless you would have been able to control your rudeness.
It was my fault that you pushed every button down my spine and because I didn’t fight back, you didn’t have a reason to change your mind.
All of those lessons from your youth- you started to forget because it was my fault that I made myself your target.
9.8.19
Sep 8, 2019
Sep 8, 2019 at 6:56 PM UTC
Back to reality
where we’ve been waiting in different capacities
for a safe place to run to-
who knew that mine would be you?
Back roads sprinkled with hope;
heart-shaped raspberry smoke.
First sips of cupcake moscato,
not wishing for tomorrow.
So I’ll leave my hair on your jacket,
take a piece of me back to Kansas
and please remember me
like the night when I was set free.
And you’ll leave your mark on my skin.
I won’t even start to pretend
that I don’t smile at the memory
of the night when I was set free.
05.13.19
May 13, 2019
May 13, 2019 at 11:04 PM UTC
Our hearts connect by poetry;
you've read the best and worst from me.
Watched naïve intentions as they've grown
into peaceful chemistry.
Then ruined by anxiety;
the beast and its variety,
when left all alone,
interrupted all that was promising.
Now hours start to feel like days
as I watch my safe place burst into flames.
I can't save us on my own
so I start to pray.
02.12.19
Feb 12, 2019
Feb 12, 2019 at 4:28 PM UTC
full moon nights; October storms,
bodies connected in innocent form.
if I could go back, freeze time in its tracks:
I’d always be yours.
02.12.19
Feb 12, 2019
Feb 12, 2019 at 3:02 PM UTC
The wind is picking up again;
we're in the middle of a hurricane
and it's easier to build a wall and defend
ourselves at the first sign of pain
but you put me on the fence,
forcing me to choose,
not what makes sense
but what I'm afraid to lose.
Hand in hand,
interlaced,
your sweet neck
hides my face.
This is where
I feel safe.
02.09.19
Feb 9, 2019
Feb 9, 2019 at 3:02 PM UTC
call me a fool, but I truly believe
that if I do not pour every drop
of emotion from my being
into the dirt of this world then
I will never know if any thing
was meant to grow.
there are hidden, thirsty
seeds between the blades
of grass begging for what
I shared with those already
bloomed.
dear Father, now I see.
02.04.19
Feb 9, 2019
Feb 9, 2019 at 10:38 AM UTC
box up your good intentions, wrap & place beneath the tree.
although I see the tag, I’ll still ask if they’re for me.
I don’t want it to be this way,
often wondering if we’re okay,
but I can’t let myself fall victim to how things used to be.
you're this patient, painted portrait & if there’s any thing you know
it’s that this world will crash by moving fast, which is why you take it slow.
well you can thank all the dudes before ya
who helped create this paranoia
that interest doesn’t truly exist unless the public gets a show.
so I’ll write my past out to you with my heart on the last line.
I’ve blossomed from that darkness yet I’m still afraid to shine.
I’m not trying to be complicated,
but the way I’m easily captivated
leaves room for me to see the truth & still be completely blind.
12.11.18
Dec 11, 2018
Dec 11, 2018 at 8:30 PM UTC
your scent is my perfume,
trapped inside my room.
I’m intoxicated for the first time,
won’t sober up any time soon.
no complaints.
12.05.18
Dec 5, 2018
Dec 5, 2018 at 4:19 PM UTC