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May 12
May 12, 2026 at 12:35 PM UTC
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May 12
May 12, 2026 at 12:35 PM UTC
I close my eyes and try to rest
In my bed thoughts infest
Infest my mind with dancing clowns
Infest my mind with lots of frowns
Colors and people and sounds O my
Thoughts twist and turn and begin to fly
Rest ever not so peaceful
As people speak of sweet sweet dreams
The word rest makes me want to scream
I feel my headache start to pound
As I lay in bed I can't help but hear a sound
A sound a thought a thing that keeps me up
I can't sleep even with a cup
A cup of chamomile that's supposed to calm
It burns my thoughts and floods my palm
A cup of caffeine that's supposed to wake
Does nothing except for make me quake
Rest ever not so peaceful
I lay in bed when tidied up
But the thought of sleep is so abrupt
I twist and turn while others rest
But I try to think and it's empty
I feel so ever blessed
That for once I can sleep and not lay in bed tensely
May 12
May 12, 2026 at 12:34 PM UTC
Why should I get up in the morning when I know it will be rough?
Why should I get up in the morning knowing the day will be tough?
Why should I roll out of bed just for a chance?
Why should I have to get out of bed when in bed it feels like a dance?
Why should I show up late when they'll sense my bluff?
Why do I do this to myself even if it feels like a trance?
I need to wake up
Wake up from the sleep that seems so sweet
Wake up to the people I need to greet
Wake up to reality that must be told
Wake up to my life that's beginning to unfold
Wake up which is what I need
Wake up which is what I'll succeed
Wake up and roll out of bed
Wake up and start to use my head
I need to wake up
What will my friends say when I show up?
What will they think when they see me?
Will they see me and fill up my cup?
Will they have smiles full of glee?
Will they be disappointed in me and their feelings blow up?
I'm going to stay in bed another day
May 12
May 12, 2026 at 12:34 PM UTC
Maggots crawl and squirm
Their grubby teeth firm
On the things I loved very young
Bright colors hopeful days
Are now covered in the dung
of those filthy maggots in their craze
The maggots eat away at my youth
I sit as they bite and gnaw
At the things I found peace in
like a stuffed bears paw
As I cry out for help my parents drown themselves in gin
They start to infest
They start to hive
They lay their eggs as if they are the best
In my youth the maggots thrive
The maggots eat away at my youth
I used to skip and enjoy fun days in the sun
But now I sit alone in my room waiting for the day to be done
People speak of happy memories when they were youthful
But I had to get by in my youth with being untruthful
But it's become too late now
The maggots have invaded every part leaving me to let out a pitiful vow
The maggots eat away at my youth
May 12
May 12, 2026 at 12:34 PM UTC
Tie me up against a cross until there's rust
Let me be tortured and stared at until I am no longer alive
Freedom screams for me, but the freedom I can no longer trust
My soul has become bones and dust
A husk of how I used to be no longer able to thrive
Tie me up against a cross until there's rust
Rinse my soul with holy water and I won't fuss
In the holy water I would willingly dive
Freedom screams for me, but the freedom I can no longer trust
The life I've had shows no lust
I see no lust for life where I used to strive
Tie me up against a cross until there's rust
Leave my body there to decompose leaving my loved ones let out a cuss
Leave it up there until maggots and beatles start to hive
Freedom screams for me, but the freedom I can no longer trust
Crucify me till the sun wakes and goes back to rest
I don't want to live with this when I didn't need to go past five
Tie me up against a cross until there's rust
Freedom screams for me, but the freedom I can no longer trust
May 4
May 4, 2026 at 12:40 PM UTC
Gears churn throughout my mind
They chug and they churn
And as I hope to find
To find the hope I yearn
My mind flows from state to state
Gears churn throughout my mind
I hope to see a better fate
My world fights to help me find
The gears begin to grind
I can't feel or think
Gears churn throughout my mind
I feel my hope begin to shrink
I look out outdoors to see a hope
My soul is not fined and dined
It sits to see if I can cope
Gears churn throughout my mind
May 2
May 2, 2026 at 4:04 PM UTC
Love is a struggle many people face
O how I wish though love would erase
Violence and hate throughout the world
Even though love is a way worse word
I may sound like a hateful ****
Starting to love would feel way worse
Love is so so very stupid
Some people say that love can mend a broken heart
O but what if the heart isn't willing to be mended?
Some people might say that my love must be ****
O but I am not offended
Very much do I believe that my love isn't ready to be shared
Even if someone wants it
Really I don't care
Yeah I want to be nice, however my love isn't fit
Love is so so very stupid
So I cry that my love is not quite fit
Truly I believe no one should have to deal with it
Under the trees I sit thinking
Peacefully believing that no one is right for me
I don't need someone to hold open the door, or give me sweet kisses
Do I need or want that? Do I want love? No
Love is so so very stupid
May 2
May 2, 2026 at 4:04 PM UTC
My fingers etch against my skin
my fingers etch against my skin
I feel the bumps and dips of my youth
i feel the bumps and dips of my youth
I feel every imperfection, as
I hope to change my life
I look up at myself in the mirror
i look up at myself in the mirror
I see my reflection look shamefully back to me
i see my reflection look shamefully back to me
The poise of my stance stand, and I
hope that I will eventually become perfect
I smile to hope to see myself
i smile to hope to see myself
I hope that tomorrow I will be someone that I want to see
i hope that tomorrow i will be someone that i want to see
To see myself become the pouted person I dream
And in my dreams I see someone that I deserve to be
Dreams I dream I hope to change
I deserve every imperfection
Pouted perfect poise stance
My life I see someone eventually
Deserve hope and I feel someone
Dream dreams Dream dreams
Poised
Perfect
Pouted
May 2
May 2, 2026 at 4:04 PM UTC
Everyone speaks of life as a sequence
The world is evil as if a sequence
A sequence
Of life and death and everything else that has a sequence
Science has a sequence
And every other class has a sequence
Everything has a sequence
All my classes have sequences
Sequence this sequence
that sequence
every second of my whole life! "I love sequences!"
Said no one ever, sequences
Are the worst, though sequences
give you a pattern to repeat, but sequences
can get so annoying after dealing withem a lot, so no, sequences
aren't fun. Sequences
of life and death and everything else carry sequences
May 1
May 1, 2026 at 12:46 PM UTC