My heart aches every time I think of you
Because not knowing whether you will still want me tomorrow
Gives me the worst heartache I've ever felt.
And it's crazy to think I'm so infatuated with you
When I barely even know you.
I remember the day I ran after you
To comfort you in the cold dark shadows
And I think it all started then.
I fell in love with the idea of you
And I haven't let it go since.
I'm begging to feel your lips against mine once more
And the touch of your hand on my leg, the twine of our fingertips.
I long for the look you give me
When you think I'm not watching.
I want to press against the space between us until it disappears.
And never let go...
Nov 23, 2015
Nov 23, 2015 at 11:44 PM UTC
It's nights like these
When I find myself
Drawing the constellations in my wrists.
I feel a filth in my bones
As I try to scrub clean
The dirt and the lies within me
And when the sky gets dark,
So do my thoughts.
I cannot mend my broken heart
Because it keeps cutting my hands
Trying to glue it back together.
As I count the stars in the galaxy that
Make up my wrists
I take a sip from the Devil's cup
And hope he spares me my soul.
Feb 6, 2015
Feb 6, 2015 at 12:24 AM UTC
Am I going crazy?
I think I am
All of these thoughts are itching at my brain
Trying to crawl out
They come out in my dreams
And feel so real
I try to scream
But my voice is lost
And I cannot breathe
I feel my heart trying to escape out of my chest
I want the silence to take over my body
But all I can hear is your voice screaming in my head
Look at me
I'm sorry
I just can't believe
What you've done to me
I can never be free
From these thoughts that are taking over me
Sep 6, 2014
Sep 6, 2014 at 12:34 AM UTC
I ****** up
And I'm sorry
But I thought you'd understand
How wrong I was,
Instead you took the knife that was already stabbing me
And twisted it deeper into my chest
I now feel the pain you asked me to endure
And I'm not sure I can forgive myself
For what I've done to you
But I also can't forgive you
Aug 11, 2014
Aug 11, 2014 at 2:08 AM UTC
*The sweet, sweet MaryJane
It takes me back
To a time when you and I were infinite
Floating on the clouds
In the distant summer paradise*
May 22, 2014
May 22, 2014 at 2:47 AM UTC
Last night is constantly on repeat:
You kissed me when you left
Like you would for the rest of your life
And I think I fell in love
With the way you bit my lip
And grasped my neck as you kissed me
I clenched your back as hard as I could
Because I didn't want to let you go
Since the thought of you not being near
Made me feel sick to my stomach
And I think I fell in love
With how you poured me shot after shot
As we downed the whole bottle of ***
And the sway of our hips together on the dance floor
Felt like we were one
Maybe I didn't say goodbye because
I was scared of never seeing you again
And now I'm here in this bed all alone
Feeling the loneliest I've ever felt
Because all I want is to relive that night over and over again
Apr 7, 2014
Apr 7, 2014 at 8:30 PM UTC
You the manipulator,
How stupid was I
To believe the lies you told me
Telling me you love me,
That I am the one
And you haven't told anyone this before,
Making me feel special,
Telling me it's okay, just one more time,
It's okay I won't tell anyone,
Just the tip, please, one more ****
Why I didn't walk out of that room,
I ask myself everyday.
I wasn't as strong as I am now,
I was young and naive.
Naive of what you were telling me
And the actions you were making,
Putting my hands where you wanted them
And saying it's okay
When your dad was sitting right there.
But you never returned the favor, did you?
How stupid was I to believe your lies and let you manipulate me
To make me believe I wanted to do the things you were making me do,
To make me think I was acting out of love,
But look at you, selfish you,
I see through you now.
How you've done this to thousands of girls
And they fall for it every time.
They fall for your looks and your charm,
But little do they know,
You're a disgusting excuse for a man,
Manipulating girls for ***
And making them believe you love them.
Look at you,
Selfish and manipulative you,
And I am finally seeing it.
Feb 27, 2014
Feb 27, 2014 at 2:06 AM UTC
And that's when I look into
Your heart filled with despair
That I can't quite grasp the words
Coming from your mouth
Telling me you love me,
But the truth is you hate me
And I can tell when you **** me
How you leave bruises and bite marks on my body
But I'm sadistic that way,
I'm addicted to this pain you cause me
That I can't even breathe when I look at you
And the thing that kills me the most is I still love you,
I can tell when I taste your lips sweet as wine
And when my hands shake as I reach for your buckle
I can feel it in my body when you finish
And I know you feel it too,
But there is no way to mend
These cuts and bruises of our souls
But I will still pray for you
Jan 20, 2014
Jan 20, 2014 at 3:01 AM UTC
You said I was your favorite taste
Of cigarettes and whiskey
So I'm begging you to kiss me gently
Because I'm longing to kiss your velvet lips
And feel your breath against my neck
I want to taste the venom on your lips and the poison on your tongue
So lay me down
Like you do in my dreams
And rest your hands on my legs
Until your fingernails are cutting into me making me bleed
And when I look into your eyes filled with pools of shadow
I question if you're a blessing or a curse
And then I ask you again,
Take my body
And make my wild weird dreams come true
Nov 19, 2013
Nov 19, 2013 at 2:55 AM UTC
*I'm sinking
As I stand here
Letting the waves engulf me.*
Oct 22, 2013
Oct 22, 2013 at 2:41 PM UTC