I like to reminisce on the times that we never had
The long nights we would spend in each others arms
The delicate touch of your skin upon my lips
The promises I would make, but could never keep
Sand in our bed, from the beach we never visited
The song in my head, playing on the night we never had
To all of the things we never had,
To all of the things we could have been
Mar 7, 2022
Mar 7, 2022 at 3:35 PM UTC
When I saw her again standing there waiting for me; I don’t know why but I didn’t expect for her to be upset. It never occurred to me that she would still be so upset from my loss.
Seeing her again was like seeing her for the first time all over again, but it wasn’t. It was so much more, there was the excitation and rush of our first meeting yet it was mingled with all the love and shared memories added in to it. It hurt cut to my heart, wrenching my insides to see even the slightest slither of pain upon her face.
We walked and we talked and joked about the old times and we acted as if everything was ok, and pretended this wasn’t about to happen. But as we sat there eating dinner at the restaurant we always over order at; I swear I was shocked by her beauty, tears loomed in my eyes as I thought, as I did the first time I saw her ‘this is the most beautiful person I’ve seen in my life’. Right then I wanted to take her hand and never let it go and as we walked back to her car and smoked our last cigarette all I wanted to do was hold her close and never let her go. But I had to; for I knew that if I didn’t, I never would. And who knows where that would have led. Either my eternal happiness, or her never ending misery. The hardest choice I ever made was to walk away from the one who never hurt me.
Aug 18, 2021
Aug 18, 2021 at 5:08 PM UTC
You loved me, and I loved you
When I could not stand the face I saw in the mirror
Through every forced smile
When my mind was full, and my thoughts were dark
You loved me, and I loved you
When I used to second guess every word I spoke
Through the sleepless nights
When I dreamt of terrors, and I had no hope for the future
You loved me, and I loved you
Aug 18, 2021
Aug 18, 2021 at 4:33 PM UTC
You ask me; why am I afraid of love?
Because time and time again I’ve seen what it does to people.
Would I do it all again?
Absolutely
Aug 7, 2021
Aug 7, 2021 at 4:29 PM UTC
“Will you save me?” I asked.
“From whom?” They replied.
“Myself”
“There’s only one person who can do that, and he is not me” replied the man in the mirror.
Feb 27, 2020
Feb 27, 2020 at 3:52 AM UTC
I know what you want from me...
I know how you want me to tell you that when I look into your eyes, my heart sinks through my stomach.
I know you want to hear of how I am heart sickened from your absence.
I know you need to hear my words, the reassurance that I care for you, more than I ever care to admit.
I know you need to know what lies truly within my heart.
But...
I know you will never read this, so as we lay next to each other as I’m writing this,
I know I will leave these words here, for everyone in the world but you.
Feb 3, 2020
Feb 3, 2020 at 3:59 AM UTC
It’s 4 a.m again,
I crawl back into my room again,
I swore tonight would be different,
But here I am, yet again...
The night seemed so dark,
But I fear the sun coming up again,
I open up a beer, again
I light another cigarette, again
I’m losing control of my thoughts again,
I want this pain to stop
Sleep alludes me, again
Will I ever break this cycle?
As I am sitting alone in my room thinking...
It’s 4 a.m again.
Jan 29, 2020
Jan 29, 2020 at 3:55 AM UTC
I once read that life is a present we did not ask for, but is too valuable to give up
So tell me,
If I never asked for you, is this the reason why I only feel alive when I’m with you?
Jan 26, 2020
Jan 26, 2020 at 3:44 AM UTC
I will bury it, for as long as I can.
It will remain hidden, in the depths of my heart,
Longing to get out,
I will drown it in smoke and bourbon,
It’s here again.. at the forefront of my mind
That feeling I get, when I look into your eyes.
If I knew failure was not an option,
I would give it all to you,
How do you go on, when you know you have to end the thing you wish would last forever?
Jan 26, 2020
Jan 26, 2020 at 2:45 AM UTC