I'm gone
I left
Don't try to reach me
Don't try to teach me
I flew away because I couldn't deal
I couldn't grasp, I couldn't sense
I went
I set off
Persuasion won't keep me
Lies have no place
In puddles of mendacity I drowned
I'm not here
I'm gone.
Feb 4, 2013
Feb 4, 2013 at 10:32 AM UTC
I don't have the means or the time
and it is beating down my heart to where I can't breathe.
In my head I am soaring to the end with great purpose
and stealing all the moments to share with no one.
Staggering, swaying, I stumble toward the prize.
The conquest is there, I can imagine it.
Within my reach, it is still miles away.
Why can't I just take it, possess it?
What stops me?
I know I want it, I know I deserve it.
But maybe I don't know anything at all.
I've lost what is real, what is actual.
Too many pictures develop in my head
of what can be, what should be, what could be.
Indecision has become a way of life.
A weigh of life.
Burdening the spirit with relentless torment.
What seems so easy to others
Becomes a festival of despair.
A mockery of triumph.
There is elation in the capture.
There is misery in the letdown.
If I could just know what is right,
Even if the right is truly wrong.
Who shares this wavering doubt?
Responsibility is mine alone,
but please take the load away from me.
I hold onto hope, hold onto forward.
To stagger back would only extend the pain,
without ever knowing the truth.
The ability to recognize is such a tremendous gift.
Assurance with the cards of play
Belief that what is wrong will be exact
Confidence in self to make the right choice.
Feb 4, 2013
Feb 4, 2013 at 10:29 AM UTC
Ocean calls and summons
Gentle waves for comfort
Raging waves for strength
Cradles the spirit
Encourages, soothes, renews
Pain drifts out with the current
Hope beckons with each wave
Movement breaks the fear apart
Scatters in the sea of harmless.
Jan 9, 2013
Jan 9, 2013 at 8:39 PM UTC
Nine divine
number of hope
number of prayer
nine seconds to happiness
nine minutes to joy
divine nine
a count to remember
a week, plus two just to be sure
nine divine.
Six and three equal nine
total days to wait for magic
nine parts to disconnect
wishes come in nine weeks
in nine months, in nine years
divine nine
dream in nine, desire in nine
discover the bliss
hold to the vision
nine divine.
Jan 9, 2013
Jan 9, 2013 at 8:37 PM UTC
Wishful thinking was all it was
It was never anything more.
I tell myself to not look back,
But still there is the allure.
If I had just wished a little harder
My request made more sincere.
I would have everything I needed
All that I hold dear.
But wishing never makes it so
It only prolongs the pain.
For wishing is just only that
A plea to stop the rain.
Dec 12, 2012
Dec 12, 2012 at 5:41 AM UTC
Sun slipping through clouds of evening
Dampened car windows
Sleepy people startled by the faint clatter of metal on tracks
Quiet smells of Pop-tarts, coffee, and gasoline fill-ups
Talk that stems from the weariness of the night and the promise of the morning
Casual, mechanical kisses of goodbye
Morning... follows night, greets the new with rehearsals of old
Begins one more session of hope.
Dec 4, 2012
Dec 4, 2012 at 7:48 PM UTC