Daisy (12:57 AM): Please please please...
Daisy (1:02 AM): I was laying down earlier, and without asking me any sort of permission, the image of Nathan with some other girl in his arms, in his room, laughing smiling, the whole idea came vividly to mind, and it crushed. It felt like someone stood on my chest and stomped. My computer was making aim noises and I didn't want to talk to anyone, I got up anyway. Now it's later, and I've shoved the thought from my mind. Now I'm alone, everyone's gone to sleep, my hair is clean, I'm alone. Damien Rice's voice pours out my speaker and my eyes overflow. I guess once I finally thought I was really really over him, it had to come back and hit me in the face. I'm so sick of sounding so stupid. It doesn't even make sense,
Daisy (1:03 AM): I shouldn't be tied to him after everything. My soul is crushed.
Daisy (1:06 AM): Sobs reach up my throat and sneak out of my mouth, filling the air, thick with sorrow, like fog. Like cigarette smoke, like smog, from thousands of cars. Why is it that i have to suffer like this for one who left me so abruptly. "I still think about you every day that passes." He said to me, and i probably believed it. He doesn't know, and thinks everything I say is some stupid dream, he answers me skeptically and full of scorn. I could scream, with my back arched in pain. Let all I ever had to say come out of me in one fluid motion.
Daisy (1:11 AM): These are answers I'll never get. Learn to live like your very own bone marrow has been stripped from you. Week and empty.
Jul 22, 2010
Jul 22, 2010 at 12:13 AM UTC
I haven't written anything
In at least a month
I've dreampt about kissing
atleast three boys
Tomorrow; I'm seeing the angel of choas.
I will be brought back down.
Jun 30, 2010
Jun 30, 2010 at 6:48 PM UTC
To the boy who works at the corner store;
With your lush deep, dark skin.
You made my day; flirting with me.
It's silly; I know.
I was having a ****** day.
Jun 30, 2010
Jun 30, 2010 at 6:44 PM UTC
You look like a ******* rockstar.
Orange hair all over the place.
Holding your face like a glass of wine.
Your lips, pierced in their perfection, snakebites.
I'll go crazy.
Your smile, sharp and perfect.
White teeth.
The way you walk with your fingers curled around a cigarette
Seeign those lips blow smoke
So sure of yourself
In your huge dark sunglasses
May 15, 2010
May 15, 2010 at 9:41 PM UTC
I don't really know what is, what never was, and what isn't.
Today you told my best friend she's beautiful and always have been.
Why did you always love everyone else more?
Was it because I gave you what you wanted?
I truly loved you?
Now you talk like it never was real.
Like a whole amazing year was just in my head.
All my fault.
So what now?
I wish you'd tell me what was real.
I wish I knew if you ever loved me,
If you ever thought I was beautiful.
Or if you're just that good at lying through your teeth.
May 15, 2010
May 15, 2010 at 9:34 PM UTC
I keep writing about people who don't know me.
Boys who would never talk to me, not even for the world.
Maybe its' some subconscious coping or something psychological
that I can't control.
Maybe I can and I'm just a creep.
May 15, 2010
May 15, 2010 at 9:24 PM UTC
Uhm, yea. 'Cause I rock your socks off like that.
Freakin' let the monkey out of the bottle.
Stupid lil' onion red pepper nacho' makin' sock eater.
Yeah man.
Tell him it;s from yours truly and
I'll eat your heart out.
May 9, 2010
May 9, 2010 at 4:25 PM UTC
Too close to sixteenth and my thought wandered.
Through my mind and down my cheeks in the form of salt water.
So I wrap my lips around, and **** the smoke into my lungs.
Breathe it out and watch it rise, beautiful and smooth.
Caught up in your trip wires, catching my ankles, I fall at your feet.
As I'm dazed and dizzy, you brand my broken heart with the harsh
letters of your name, deep like broken promises, hot like passionate
hate.
May 9, 2010
May 9, 2010 at 4:23 PM UTC
You're all
cutting large holes is everything I do.
Talking to you; is like...
being thrown in a room with everything that scares you
being tossed into water with your limbs tied
I can't believe what happened.
I'm trying so hard to let you go;
to let the scars fade.
It's not even scarred over yet,
these open wounds still bleed while I sleep.
You seem utterly the same;
I realized something today.
The little boy I fell in love with;
full of emotions and thoughts,
laughter and a heartbeat...
He's gone.
So now,
I'll slice holes in my chest.
Cry to myself.
Say goodbye to my hopeless dream.
Apr 14, 2010
Apr 14, 2010 at 8:24 PM UTC
You're lifting me up to the stars.
we're sitting cross-lagged on the moon.
Drinking coffee in the clouds.
Your eyes are as deep as ever;
I'm tripping over your laughter;
Ringing inside me;
Falling into your eyes.
I'm trailing off mid-sentence,
"cause you're smiling and I can't get past it.
Never thought I'd stop being broken;
Like a bone taken under a train.
Something about the way you talk.
The way you don't talk.
Makes me stop.
Just to mess up your hair.
And stop the world for a second.
Skip over the reality.
Just for a minute.
Apr 10, 2010
Apr 10, 2010 at 9:12 PM UTC