I had you in my hand
and was given the cheat sheet
I’ve read the script
and the costume fits
Memorised how it played out
and
Saw the ending when they turned the page
Yet unbeknownst to me,
carefully hidden was a back-up scene
Leaving me aghast
and the play crumbled
You slipped off my hand, just like that
Like how a tornado
destroys in an instant
What was once
such a beautiful house
Yet for you,
I called up the Writer
night and day
Gave Him 3 dimes
to re-write a new ending
He refused but I kept bargaining
back and forth for 12 days
He finally agreed
and told me to sign the agreement,
insisting for 11 dimes as the final price
12 dimes were all I had
But
I still decided to settle with this agreement
I was prepared to throw away everything
And risk myself for another broken-heart
So I said deal,
as long as I can have you
Even if it’s just for another while
.
Before I lose you again
when the wind comes
To take you away from me
forever
Jan 27, 2019
Jan 27, 2019 at 4:06 AM UTC
Disappointment
What happened today really made me
realize a lot of things
about you
Who you really are
I listened to your every word
Like you spat diamonds
But you barely listen to anything I say
All that matters to you
Is your words
I remember the last time
I asked God if I could just marry you
and be with you for the rest of my life
In His reply, God was curt
Because He knew that I knew it can’t happen
He’s told me so many times,
“You know it yourself and in your own heart,
there is a better guy for you.”
And my God, God was right.
My gut is always months ahead accurate
My heart will always protect me
Dec 18, 2018
Dec 18, 2018 at 10:18 PM UTC
One chance
Is all I got
Before you leave me for good
But tell me
If we put a limiter
Like this
On our relationship
Is it still called a relationship?
Or is it a mere test relationship?
To grade it
As a pass
Or a fail
I feel that
Our relationship
Is just a time-bomb
Ticking
Until it meets its end
We are just
On the verge
Waiting
For one of us
To fall
It is what it is
Dec 13, 2018
Dec 13, 2018 at 10:43 AM UTC
2:03 am
I’m lying in bed
Thinking
About the time we broke up
And got back together again
You told me
There was just so much expectations
All I wanted
Was your attention
But instead
You’d come home and go on your phone
Till you get tired and sleep
I wanted your attention
But you told me
You’re just too comfortable
Because you see me everyday
You’re so different with other people
So energetic
And happy
I just wanted your attention
But you told me
You’re just so used to be in silence with me
I asked for a cuddle
And most of the time
You’d let out a big sigh
Before flopping your arms on me
As if your definition of a cuddle
Is simply
Just
Throwing your arms
On my shoulder
How to get your attention
When you think
Asking for your attention
Is just too much expectations?
Dec 13, 2018
Dec 13, 2018 at 10:23 AM UTC
You can take away all possessions that I have
And I'd still live
You can burn me to ashes
And I'd still live
You can break every bone in my body
And I promise you
With any last remaining of my will
I'd still live
Jul 4, 2017
Jul 4, 2017 at 5:33 PM UTC
"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
He asked.
She had been waiting forever for him to finally asked her that
But her usual bright expression suddenly turned somber at his question
A feeling of anger crept up
Replacing her soft smile with a frown
The sparks in her eyes that always lit up whenever she saw him
Now gone and dead
This feeling, she knew
This feeling she was so familiar with
everytime she thought of him
And it still felt like a huge stone
Pulling her down to her knees
There was a question that had been in her mind
For weeks
For months
"How could I, when you don't even like me as much as you like her?"
And her words hit home.
He had not expected that
Not with the way she always seemed happy around him
Not with the way she always smiled warmly at him
Not with the way she was always there caring for him no matter how difficult he was
"I do love you,"
she stared right into his eyes,
every word fell from her lips
with such sincerity
it felt like the first ray of warm sunlight
on a winter morning
The only warm source to his heart that has gone cold now
such intensity in her eyes
"but I can't be number two."
And they pierced his heart right through.
She got up and left.
He called her name over and over
Wishing she'd turn back and give him another chance
But his voice only seemed to be engulfed by the intense air around him
He ran after her
But she was gone
He punched the black wooden door beside him frustratingly
And he wished he had loved her more.
Jul 4, 2017
Jul 4, 2017 at 5:00 PM UTC
Her fingers caressed the ivories
So very lightly.
The tunes that played
Echoing sweetly.
*Nuvole Bianche,
Ludovico Einaudi*
The title, she said,
means white clouds.
To her,
this song
captures the feeling of utmost sincerity
that exist in the purest
of her heart.
To be able to stay soft,
even after passing through cruel hands of the world.
To be as kind as you can,
even if the world will not pay you back.
To go out of your way for others,
even if it will never be enough.
To be genuine until the very end,
even when the whole world is against you.
To be soft in this cruel world
might just be the strongest power
a human can possibly possess.
May 31, 2017
May 31, 2017 at 2:47 PM UTC
There was
a feeling of
uncanny familiarity
when we talk.
Like I've recognised
this soul
somewhere,
between the lives
that I remember
or that I don't.
I feel like
your soul
and my old soul
might have been
very old friends
after all.
May 31, 2017
May 31, 2017 at 2:37 PM UTC
You came to my life
And taught me a lot of things.
You inspired me
Beyond what could have been.
You were the storm
That changed my calm skyline.
You were the sun
That lit up my dark world.
You were the fire
That burned my worries away.
You were the catalyst
That propelled me forward.
You gave me everything I needed
To grow, to prosper, to be better
Than I used to be.
You gave me so much meaning to my life
But I can't give anything to you in return.
And I'm so, so sorry
That there's nothing I can give
To be able to return what you've given me,
To be able to mark your heart,
To make you remember me,
Like how I will always remember you, 'till my hair turns grey.
Jan 1, 2017
Jan 1, 2017 at 4:41 AM UTC
He understood me.
Just like that.
All my life I never expect anyone
to understand me even a single bit
Not once.
Not ever.
Not a single soul ever did.
And I was fine with it.
I did not mind.
I was used to being misunderstood.
Every day, every week, every time.
No one ever understands, and that was expected.
But he came when I least anticipated it
And he understood me.
I don't know how he did it,
But he did.
Jan 1, 2017
Jan 1, 2017 at 1:33 AM UTC