It ****** me off you won't talk to me
Like I'm the worst person you've ever met
Out of everyone who doesn't acknowledge me
Your neglect cuts the deepest
I thought we cherished the same memories
Memories it seems you've already forgotten
You must be incredibly lucky to have a mind so protective,
Or maybe you're simply cruel and I never noticed
You treated me like none other
The love you gifted me healed a few bitter scars from my skin
Now the new cuts I have look so familiar,
But they're not the same
The pain I wince at is signed with your name
Another frame to hang in the notorious hall of fame
Every so often I pass by to reminisce
Since old love can be humorous at times, in a way
But your image disappoints me
As if the trust we built was made of wet sand, in your eyes
Your eyes, the ones I fell deeply entranced in,
The same ones you deemed ordinary, I proposed as incomparable
But now they don't even see me,
Paired with ears that refuse to hear my cries
So I whisper to myself
Words I wished I could tell you
Maybe one day you'll listen
And on that day I hope I'll be willing to talk
Goodnight, Natalie
I'll miss you
Jun 23, 2019
Jun 23, 2019 at 4:57 AM UTC
You stopped calling months ago
We were still together, but you didn’t call
That hurt more with each passing day
It hurt to see you smile less with me
I tried grinning for the two of us,
But first I had to wade through my tears
It hurt to hear you lie to me
It was infuriating to listen to you,
Because you felt sorry for me
It hurt to wait for the end with you,
Like two people at a train station
Waiting for your next love to pick you up
It hurts that I’ll never hold you again,
And you’ll never call my name and smile
Not like you used to
You never even said good-bye
The last thing I saw were tears,
And you walking away
Jan 9, 2019
Jan 9, 2019 at 8:47 PM UTC
Isn’t it funny that we can breathe the same air even when we’re so far away?
Maybe that’s why it feels like you’re inches from me.
And I knew you the least when you were closer than ever.
Why do you have to be so far for me to fully understand you, as you are?
When I make love with her I close my eyes and think of you.
We could be young forever, and maybe that’s why I’ll remember your body.
Does it even matter that you’ve let go of me?
We’ve let go before.
But maybe I’ll stop dreaming of us, day trip with another in my arms, and be happy.
Maybe you don’t love me, or maybe you do. It doesn’t matter.
We’ll meet again.
And when we do, will it be different?
Sep 14, 2018
Sep 14, 2018 at 12:39 AM UTC
Remember when we had nothing?
Remember when all I had was you?
Remember how I used to scrape in the keys,
Just to hear the engine fall flat?
Of course you don’t
You were chasing finer linens
I was chasing more dividends,
For us
Remember how I used to scream blood?
Remember when you turned blue?
You turned blue and looked at my cuts,
Then looked away as I turned white
I remember the cracked mirror
The cracked mirror that showed the real me
You looked at me and saw The Devil
I accepted my scorched skin long before you wouldn't
Lucifer fought for his people,
Even as he fell from grace
And now I live in the hell I created,
Happy
Sep 1, 2018
Sep 1, 2018 at 3:14 AM UTC
Clockwork
Just a taste, then the image fades
Now more than ever,
I want to wake next to a stranger
Clockwork
I know you ache, I know,
I’ll make your pain disappear
Like a bandit, like a devil
Clockwork
There you go, just a taste
I savor every bite, I do
Clockwork
Aug 17, 2018
Aug 17, 2018 at 1:38 AM UTC
I listen to Blue when I’m with you
I listen to O’s shudder when you are gone
And share a hope of warmth when I dream,
Of course, of you
I see Red in our house today
Do the Devil’s tears fade my eyes?
Running until there is nothing?
I see but do not recognize you
I can hear, I can see, but where are you?
I have taste, touch, smell, all of it!
But I am in bed with a stranger
I know all of you, or nothing
Aug 14, 2018
Aug 14, 2018 at 7:37 PM UTC
The pop of a fresh handle, like hands placed on a rusted but polished railing
Overlooking a foreign harbor, I wish it would rain
But all it ever does is hail, like the echoing “knock” of a nail being hammered in
A subtle reminder, resembling their howls
I wish the silver I wore at my neck tired their mouths, those critics that read my life’s work
But “Never Write!”
Familiar taunts, I watch as they stare into mirrors with grins
Ignoring our pleas? Abuse is nothing new to the youth
Old scars wrapped in bitter bandages weigh in on my head’s case, I see tilted
But as long as I can get to the pier, I “shouldn’t” worry
Regardless, rain or shine, it gets exhausting having to check
Regularly, and often I ask if it is worth it, especially when it is
Aug 8, 2018
Aug 8, 2018 at 6:49 PM UTC