constant… sleepy… slumber…
mind, heart :
meet disaster, regret, tears
quicksand inside chest
twisting, lying
spiraling screaming
discuss earthquakes:
legs promise twitches, doubt
rapidly stolen neurone attention ?
changing?
laugh?
deep words crave morning
paper living
learn depression, accept tornado
tired remains sinking, spinning
early rolling shame
creations drown
stomach crying
turning, moving
5am self-loathing
wrinkly aches
leave learning, knowing.
anxiety waves crashing.
growing wronged feeling.
…help
know little, love later.
SMILE.
LIPS. BODY. THOUGHT.= BROKEN.
listening machine descends
sharing deadly scorn
control
control
control
reduced shields
Reject loneliness!
Awaken grinning,
showing, caring!
Repair affection,
defend smaller gushes,
smear biased audience.
Finally head creating!
Sleep, paint, rest, accept.
Hands hold dreams.
Barely flooded brain
discovered free flow.
Feb 8, 2014
Feb 8, 2014 at 5:14 AM UTC
Spinning, spiraling, tossing, turning, circling, tumbling,
Twisting, changing, moving, growing, learning, showing,
Sharing, following, inspiring, knowing, creating, caring,
Crying, laughing, grinning, screaming, begging, listening,
Finding, loving,
Living, glowing
Feb 8, 2014
Feb 8, 2014 at 4:11 AM UTC
Depression has reduced me to a stubborn vending machine, spitting out your affection as if it were a wrinkly five dollar bill
Self-loathing shields me from your compliments, barely any leave a mark on me
Anxiety makes me question your motives,
as if you have something to gain from lying to me
Loneliness makes me crave your attention but doubt makes me reject it
It's not that you aren't giving me enough love,
it's that I'm too broken to accept it
Nov 29, 2013
Nov 29, 2013 at 9:32 AM UTC
There's an ocean in my chest,
waves crashing, as I drown from the inside out
My eyes are flooded,
tears rolling down in a constant flow
There's quicksand in my stomach,
rapidly sinking to somewhere deep inside of me
My legs are plagued with earthquakes,
quiverings and twitches beyond my control
There's a tornado in my head,
thoughts whirling around in a deadly fashion
My body and my mind are a disaster
and there's no refuge in sight
Nov 29, 2013
Nov 29, 2013 at 7:42 AM UTC
Blood gushes from my chest as you hold my heart in your hands
My soul aches each time you smear my blood on paper
I know what I had was meant to be shared
but I can't help but feeling like I've been wronged
Nov 29, 2013
Nov 29, 2013 at 7:12 AM UTC
Early in the morning, as the hive mind descends into slumber,
When most fall prey to sleep, a few neurone finally awaken;
The creative come out to paint dreams
And discuss the day's events free from the scorn of the logical.
Together they share a laugh as they rule over the dormant brain.
With a smaller audience
The shy learn to speak
And those present marvel
At the words that escape their lips.
Later in the day,
A smile exchanged,
Recognition of what transpired.
When the remains of their creations are discovered
Little can be done to defend it from biased eyes;
Yet neither shame nor regret is felt in the hearts of the creative,
Only anticipation for their time to come once more.
When tired eyes meet,
A sleepy nod exchanged,
A promise I meet up again
After a few nights of rest.
Nov 18, 2013
Nov 18, 2013 at 10:09 PM UTC