with no hope for a blink of relief,
you are wandering smoke in my eyes that sting
you fill my head with buzzing bees
and attack my lungs with tar unseen
your honey coated throat sings of suicide
unbeknownst to you how many times I've cried
for all you see is the bad in things
it's killing you, no matter how slowly
do you remember that violent storm
when my blood kept your skin warm?
all I do is miss the rain,
why can't winter come and stay?
despite these things I see in you a light
can't open your eyes, try though I might
imagined emptiness engulfs your brain
will you ever be mine again?
Nov 14, 2014
Nov 14, 2014 at 7:26 PM UTC
do your fingers try to get me high?
touches like heroine as you pull up my skirt
I know the bruises aren't meant to hurt
at the end of our affair, at the end of the night
all I have are imprints of your teeth on my thigh
how much energy I can continue to exert
with feelings in such disconcert?
if only you also wished to be mine...
Nov 4, 2014
Nov 4, 2014 at 10:24 PM UTC
a lit cigarette with hope wearing thin,
for awhile I can keep my own ember alive;
if for too long you forget to breathe me in,
I will quiet, and meekly meet my demise.
Nov 3, 2014
Nov 3, 2014 at 7:05 PM UTC
for years I have felt of stone
pale, grey-veined marble untouched by bare hands
separated by barriers tangible and otherwise
my skin was lusting for the heat of humanity
I missed you the way a stillborn misses the intake of breath
until the day you invited me into your bed and
took a chisel to my heart and head
these cracks run deep
you can be found in the magma below my belly button
the pure pumice coming from between my lips
I may have jagged ridges with the power to cut
because I am viscous yet
may you dance through these fractures like water and soften my edges
Oct 14, 2014
Oct 14, 2014 at 2:25 AM UTC
~~
*Once, I was a hard sand stone
Neither had I made a tune nor a tone
I had broken after a strong shock wave
From a waterfall, I had fallen into a pothole but could not settle
After I was moving with a long stream as a rolling stone
Now I have no edge but only passing a phase
A few days ago, I discovered myself as a grain of sand
And day by day, I have been drowning beneath the ocean
~~
@ Musfiq us shaleheen*
Sep 14, 2014
Sep 14, 2014 at 5:10 PM UTC
within each of us is the spiraling turbulence of a pacific wave
undoubtedly powerful, an ever present energy
able to shift like the tectonic plates or like a hummingbird's wings
to elevate euphoria or trap souls in sea foam
Sep 2, 2014
Sep 2, 2014 at 3:20 AM UTC
rainbow fish with the most beautiful teeth
swimming in circles around my head
******* breath out of my lungs
so suddenly that I sob my mothers name
and even the name of the god that I do not know
before the darkness of the lack of oxygen leaves me in a daze
and floating on the floor in a pool of my own sweat
clear like diamond tears from a dragon who lost its fire
whose only intent is to **** me father down into the shadows
as cold as the belly of a glacier
where I can finally catch a clear glimpse of my own soul
battered and tarnished and stained
i wish somebody could save me from this
fish seemingly beautiful but full of hate and
I don’t know where the hate came from
it suddenly rose in me at
first like a gentle drizzle and then became a tidal wave
that will flatten anything and all that wanders into its way
I don’t even know if I am capable of love anymore
will the monsters leave
wont they go
I need to shrink like alice
and go far away from this life that others have built for me
I am rapunzel in her tower I am trapped
but I cut off my own hair in a fit of self hate
and now have no way to escape
the only thing I can do is wait
but how am I supposed to change when I am locked away
in my own mind and nobody can come in
and nobody can help
and I don't know how to save myself
Aug 30, 2014
Aug 30, 2014 at 12:31 PM UTC
kissing you was like swerving into oncoming traffic
i can never tell if i am more haunted by empty picture frames or the ashes of their contents
you taught me that the saying "pick your battles" meant not answering when love was at the door
sometimes when i drink whiskey i swear i can hear your voice in the creases of my bedsheets & i sleep on the floor
i still catch myself running my hands over things you touched the most, looking for the echoes of your fingertips
i practice things i'll never say to you
i remember the day you told me you didn't like poetry, how "everything's already been said" & how "nothing meaningful can be captured without being cliche" you know, i don't miss you like the sun and moon, i do not miss you like tide bent waves crashing on the shoreline, i miss you like a chernobyl swingset misses children
rumor has it that drowning is a lot like coming home, that drinking bleach can **** the butterflies in your stomach
for your love of cigarettes, i would have been an ashtray
this halloween i want to dress up as the you when you loved yourself and show up on your doorstep
i never understood what you meant when you said i was an instrument, back when you would cup your hands around my chest and breathe through the holes in my heart, i still wonder if the sounds i made remind you of wind chimes
i never paid much attention to abandoned buildings until i became one
in my dreams all the flowers smell like your perfume
i am the only person who has ever wished for the same snowflake to fall twice
if i could go back, and rewrite the definition of audacity, it would be how when we lost the bet of love, you said "we never shook on it"
i love you, if the feeling is not mutual, please pretend this was a poem
the only apology i want from you, is to have you repeat the names of children we will never have in your parents living room until they *****
we are the same person if you find yourself up at 4am dry heaving promises, or if you are kept awake by the laughter of those who've abandoned you
nobody ever told you that goodbyes taste like the back of stamps
sometimes i'm convinced that the only reason we hug, is so you can check my back for exit wounds
May 20, 2014
May 20, 2014 at 9:48 PM UTC