it was a terrifying thing-
waking up in the middle
the facade of night still
shrouding my head from full
comprehension.
my body like a damp linen;
drugged, torn, held up to my face-
musty, the pangs and echos of
horrifyingly false dreams rush
all throughout my bloodstream;
straight to my face, big and bulky
i think i might explode soon-
yet before an intelligent thought, quickly
quickly! it's a memory of a person
supposedly next to me!
turning my face on its electronic pedestal
i meet the bedroom doorframe,
i meet both sides of my bed
in frantic panic, yet
it seems to me, so suddenly
in my single-sized bed-
my heart has yet again
fooled my pretentious little head
Dec 17, 2019
Dec 17, 2019 at 4:49 AM UTC
Goodnight Moe
It was good to know you,
found you in the rickety Virginia City
wooden shelter
alone, staring sadly out at the world
so small,
I guess you could call it a rescue.
Once the puppy stacking wild mustang poops on the front deck
Running wild with the coyotes
You always were a scrapper
When eye contact made,
Your half hour battle with Bingo on a frozen Nevada night
Slipping on the snow and ice.
The night you walked by my side
When the blizzard came
Keeping me from falling down that hill
when I was sliding, how'd you know?
Goodbye Moe
It was good to know you.
Waking us up with the first light of dawn
Sticking your nose
Into my tears
Licking away my sorrows
Curled at our feet on a cold winter night
Chasing the cougar
Up the Tamarack tree
When the wild purple onions were blooming
You always had that faster second speed.
Now your legs can hardly hold you
And when the puppy came
You were big daddy
Patient and teaching a young one how to be
As you taught me
Goodbye Moe it was good to know you.
Well, now that puppy is probably
Going to outlive me, outlive you,
And now that the volume of your hearing has been turned down
The thunder and July 4th no longer send you panting
You were always to big to be a lap dog.
Now silence is all you know
Far away from those Virginia City
Mountain days
Everything changes
Everything passes
Time spins around
Our days and our nights.
Now hobbling along Dry Lagoon
Where the big waves curl
You stand bewildered and confused
But when you see me you know which direction to go.
The night is coming
We know that
Better head on home
Goodnight Moe it was good to know you.
Feb 25, 2019
Feb 25, 2019 at 3:47 AM UTC
Stars prickle the darkness
counterpoints to measure its vastness
they steal eyes and gift wonderment
allow birth of dream and scientific torment
they witness and receive wishes,
they exist yet
many are no longer in existence
the closest is only seen in its loneliness
yearning to shed the veil of blue
Feb 15, 2019
Feb 15, 2019 at 8:16 PM UTC
on a sea strand,
have you watched empty shells
mercilessly tossed from sea to shore
and from shore to sea?
often I shrink and reduce to such a shell,
with jagged and broken edges
colorless and empty
among many a debris cast on the shore,
i lie half buried under the sand
waiting for some mighty wave
to wash me away
all the way to the sea
how tedious is my voyage
shuttling from him to her
and from her to him
unable to openly confess
who weighs more
on the balance of preference
through how many alleys and by ways
I have wandered, questioning my identity!
am I a puffer fish, being toxic
the fisher men have discarded?
a jarring note in a discordant symphony?
I wonder....! I often ask myself!
destined to grow
in mercurial climes,
planted in arid shallow soil
with the tap root trimmed,
branches pruned,
growth denied,
I, a stunted bonsai!
still I dream to be a towering tree,
that in profusion gives fruits and shade!
a ****** aspiring to be a Goliath
a hollow reed,
longing at once to be the singer and the song!
Jul 29, 2018
Jul 29, 2018 at 7:31 AM UTC
a hook of a moon
hanging low
burying itself into the dark soil of night ploughing methodically
churning the folds of time unsympathetically
despondent
weary
oblivious to the passing seeds
of thought
laboured over.
Should I expect more
from the ruts it rolls,
perhaps growth of understanding
or a crop of acknowledgment
for my wonderment of it?
Or is it simply a tool
to capture imaginations
of a fool who secretly belives
I have an intimate bond
with its silent magnificence,
perhaps wishing it looks at me
like a brother who shares this moment.
Jul 24, 2018
Jul 24, 2018 at 8:28 PM UTC
Missed a train to look at the flowers
growing wild by the station wall.
So pretty in the daytime,
they shied away come nighttime
leaving me
with nothing at all.
Only had change for one coffee
then I spied a wishing well
Something was wrong
the water was all gone
watched my hopes sink
as the coins fell
A thousand things will lead you astray
from all those things you could've done
if its the risk you choose
you'll probably lose,
but once in a while
I have won.
Apr 14, 2018
Apr 14, 2018 at 1:09 AM UTC
Pain sang its tempting song across my waters again
Babylon
But I cant find it in me to move anymore
Unwillingly, the clock’s finger moves to its own accord
Following each tail end, endlessly
In a mocking game of sorts
Numbers eying me viscously
Telling me You Can’t Stop Me.
Ripping out the cord,
Shelf-shed, flying metal clock head-
Hit the wall and sank slowly
As time came undone, dead
And my own song-
Silently weeping, grasping my head-
Apr 12, 2018
Apr 12, 2018 at 1:12 PM UTC
Let's cut to the chase
She was up in my face
Like the alcoholic eyes
And her bottle of mace
She lunged at my lips
But I was too quick
She fell on the floor
Smearing lip stix
Then she begged on her knees
"Why can't I fill all your needs ?"
She looked so pathetic
She was certainly not steez
Then when I had turned away
She grabbed the knife off the tray
And came at me
Before I could say ,"Hey !"
But she did stumble
And took an awfully bad tumble
And the knife point pierced
The heart full frontal
So the police were called
They arrived without stall
They asked "How did she die ?"
"Strangulation ! No lie !"
Apr 11, 2018
Apr 11, 2018 at 3:09 PM UTC
When she died a part of you did too
His voice that rang like shimmering church bells
Fell oceans deep
A water well
In the darkness of what was
Broken little pieces
From up above
Departed; Leaving
Stories retold
Smiles retrieving
When the skies are blue
I'll look for you
Apr 10, 2018
Apr 10, 2018 at 7:00 AM UTC
below a tall fig tree
stands a desperately hungry
me
sun shedding heat softly
pores exposed and accepting,
I cannot seem to reach far above me
I try it all
hoping that one might give up and fall
to my feet, into my hand,
that fig - so tender and small
will it be ripe enough for me?
can I accept from an unknown ficus tree?
if all the little fruits of substance,
gazed down upon me from a seat higher up
-in heaven, perhaps
each a different life, a different possibility
maybe then would the choice be so simple
as to pick and choose the right one for me
yet in the heart of the fig tree I stand
hungry and unable to spot difference from sameness
the fruitful choices might, then, just laugh at me
as I struggle to reach even one, singularly
sitting in the heart
slowly starving
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 3:59 PM UTC