The worrying whisper
The rapid heartbeat
The sound of a stomach churning
Blood boiling
Thoughts like steel blades
Breaking into concentration
Scattered
Slashed
An infectious infection
Lingering
Stewing
In the back of the mind
Too hard to push away
Yet, too easy to find
Haunting
Smouldering
Staring intensely
Gripping tight of my mind
Refusing to leave
Anxiety
Anxiety
Anxiety
Jan 30, 2020
Jan 30, 2020 at 5:31 PM UTC
Took her by the hand
For promises unkept
Lies
Deceit
Which lead to utter dread
One:
Brainwashing at your own expense
Lying to yourself
Lies about a man
For breaking your heart
He did nothing wrong
For you lied from your chest
Now he is gone
I'm not him
Your subtle Christian boy
You taught me that lies
Can be a powerful toy
Our love was a lie
A sham
Less than everything
You sought your revenge
Trying to make an innocent man sing
Two:
You kept your secrets
Kept your distance
Your own agenda
A silent yet watchful woman
That is until the next bottle was opened
Memories of your past with him
Willing to cheat
Willing to break you
You seemed to like that
I'm not him
Passive aggressive
A mild mannered boy
A manic depressive
You taught me that love
Is one powerful thing
Thank you for teaching me
Something more to bring
Three:
Paradise at first
But soon went sour
You had addictions
Acid
Boozing
Flower
You longed to see the world
You never left home
Too high to care
You left me alone
I'm not him
The druggy kind of man
Problems from my brain
Left blood in my hand
Blood from my own vein
Left alone
Four:
Started from the heart
But not how it ended
Bed
Bed
Bed
Wish it hadn't ended
Pictures and language
Your ***** talk was sweeter tasting than your lips
Including the pair between your thick hips
Aggressive ***
Our ties were tighter than your *******
You screamed for more
But left me with broken promises
You taught me much
Sometimes the sword is mine than the pen
I'm not that guy
Not dead inside
Felt things
But still a master to make you bend
Five:
Man on man
We fought
Day
Night
Beginning to end
You play me almost everyday
Depression
Anxiety
Abundance of gay
We like boys
We like girls
A unique personality
I'm not him
I'm different now
Strong yet fragile
Cautious and proud
I bled for you
I sought to find you
I may not be you
But I'm right beside you
I am me and you are you
Best kept separate
Toxic together
I have learned many things
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
You have made me stronger
A reason to stay alive
Our journey has ended
For most of you
But it's for these reasons I stay true
You taught me five things to avoid
Stay clear of
I'll make the right decision
I have no fear anymore
Thank you for the gifts
But now it's you five
I will not miss
Sep 12, 2019
Sep 12, 2019 at 5:29 AM UTC
The clock just struck the hour of five
Five in the morning that is
The purpose to write has come over
The urge to format has come back
The disease to let go of the emotions
In a bold faced type
Returning once again from the rock
From which I have claimed for so many years
Another chapter
A new beginning
A rebirth of the prodigal son
Welcome back writer
You're part of the poet's world once more
Sep 12, 2019
Sep 12, 2019 at 5:14 AM UTC