stop acting like emotions exist singularly in the one moment.
if they did; we’d be expressing that emotion for the first time each time we smiled or cried or felt hurt. we’d have no triggers; no memories of previous emotions.
emotions are like mercury in the body. they build up. the presence of them already within the body shapes the way the new emotions are felt and expressed.
betrayal after betrayal is like scurvy.
your body doesn’t really heal in the sense we think of; it covers up the scars with collagen. when you have scurvy, you don’t have enough vitamin a, and body stops making collagen.
and all the old wounds open up again, amongst your new ones
Oct 22, 2013
Oct 22, 2013 at 7:12 AM UTC
1. Candles smell best when the day is nearing its end and you feel the weariness in your bones. Favourites flicker like moods and the way the fire dances upon the wick; fresh scents mostly. Zingy citrus and sweet melon and cucumber, and sometimes sweet spice and serenity which smells like old memories.
2. As a sister, I do no know what kind of attributes I wish for a sister. Even though I adore and get annoyed in equal parts by the girl who calls me big sissie, I could not name what it is that I exactly would want. Perhaps, I would enjoy some one such as Nana Visitor as my sister, although one wonders if having actors for a family member is the best.
Kelly Rowland comes to mind, and perhaps I would adore her as a sister the most.
3. I have longed for a brother for a long time, wished I had one just to experience it, mostly. I’d want someone fierce, but someone understanding too. Someone who would not treat me like I could look after myself, and under much consideration, I do not believe there is someone I’d truly want as a celebrity as my brother. Perhaps Olly Murs, if I had to really answer this.
4. Marriage is not something I would wear well, I do not think. It’s not a comfy pair of sweats or a too big sweater. It’s a very pretty dress, or a dapper suit and it doesn’t fit like colourful beanies or a rather fluffy scarf.
5. Books lay in piles about the space entitled my room, old bottles from years before I was born live in their own special cupboards. Piles of intricately made teaspoons and bone-handled knives tuck into boxes upon boxes upon boxes. Old text books barely squeeze into my shelves. I hoard like I breathe.
6.When young and flexible I managed to tie myself in knots; I’d fit in spaces I only dream about now and stretch like I was reaching for the light. Doing such things like the splits doesn’t occur to me anymore, I’ve got a book to read, an emotion to write and a song to hum under my breath.
Sep 24, 2013
Sep 24, 2013 at 8:22 AM UTC
sometimes i feel like
i’m not really breathing.
sometimes it’s like there’s water
in my lungs.
sometimes i think it’s just because
i’m missing you.
Sep 24, 2013
Sep 24, 2013 at 8:18 AM UTC
your fingers were huge
against mine, and i -
i wanted to hold on tightly,
perhaps forever.
Sep 24, 2013
Sep 24, 2013 at 8:17 AM UTC
i met a boy today
with warm hands
and his fingers bumbled as
they passed me my change.
i don’t think i’ll see
him again.
but that’s okay.
Sep 22, 2013
Sep 22, 2013 at 4:49 AM UTC
the sun will rise tomorrow
and the next day
and the next
and the next,
over and over
and over again,
continuous, cyclic
forever.
too bad to you it’s
positive. so positive.
for it speaks of
ageless tremors and
never ending fears.
it talks of not caring of
my woes, laughing at
my pain.
and it does on
and the next day
and the next day
forever.
Sep 22, 2013
Sep 22, 2013 at 4:25 AM UTC
and i stood, chest heaving
up
and
down,
in socks and clothes meant
for summer.
and the wind, it roared around me
threatening to topple me
over.
and, i stared down the
cliff, stares at the bottom
and i wondered.
wondered what i’d look like
down there.
pale and cold, ****** and broken.
i wondered if i’d jump and
my mind would stay here,
toes buried in the sand
as my body fell, tumbled and
bounced.
i wondered if i’d see the blood,
watch it pool out around me,
feeling calmer than i ever had
and then,
i stepped back from the cliff edge,
perhaps another day.
Sep 22, 2013
Sep 22, 2013 at 4:18 AM UTC