I've crawled in bed with you my sweets. Losing your interest was my biggest defeat. Wouldn't change a single thing! A beautiful memory, the last thing I have to remember my love for me. Couldn't find anything as close. Years down the road. I've survived being so ******* LONELY. PROUD of myself for finally ditching the bars and bottles. Cheers to these scars that once have been kissed by your lips. KISS away your good mornings. I often think of your kisses from the NIGHT. I'm find peace, but wish I had COMPANY.
Take me back to AUTUMN!
Rake away the tears, sometimes I wish you never had to LEAF.
I apologized to myself once sobriety taught me it's SAFER in isolated rooms. Taught me alot about myself and those I LOVE. I'd go back to Autumn to remember the reasons why I'm here.
Apr 12
Apr 12, 2026 at 4:01 PM UTC
Flies buzzing, maggots consuming.
My whole life decaying.
How much deeper can this go?
Will this be my home?
**** you!
You don't get to learn when, where, and why I did. About to permanently shut my eye lids!
Securities meant to be open, a casket shall be closed.
Feb 14
Feb 14, 2026 at 5:14 AM UTC
You win.
I've burned red, green, & white flags at the surrender of my heart.
You win.
I won't allow you back in again.
You win.
I've taunted my securities for the sake of your arguments.
You win.
Congratulations of losing me all, I just wanted to be recognized for my sacrifices, but through the process I've learned nothing I did meant a single thing.
You won your point of view by default a handful of tears ago.
But you'll never win me ever again.
Jan 26
Jan 26, 2026 at 11:55 PM UTC
I've crawled under the thin ice I was told I was standing on.
I've painted my arms blood red.
Still trying to fight the wrong.
Maybe I'll drown with the words you claimed I've said.
I've been so strong, for so long, but failed and would rather stay gone.
Pretty easy to catch the wrong I've done.
But impossible for you to understand my passion, easy to paint my understandings gray and black.
The ******* **** I'd do to get my peace back.
Now all I see is........shhhhhhhhh
You don't get to understand my observations anymore.
Jan 23
Jan 23, 2026 at 2:23 AM UTC
Selfish by action, selfish opinions using me in vain.
Crazy to think I wasn't all that sane, a loving silent person gripping my veins. Happiness in a dream, tears of rejoice.
Shhh
I never liked the sound of my actions, was never meant to annoy.
Told myself I'm loyal, forced to reset my respects. Pretend to laugh with gritted teeth, I'm happy to fight off the aches to gain a gratitude.
I've seen the best of the worse to myself and me. Happier that it only mattered to no one else but me.
The successful chapters gave me the strength to appreciate gratitude.
Rude or not, can't count words my actions never said. Happy to gain a healthy circle I can proudly respect with no regrets. Happy to be closer with my family. Appreciate having my friends. You're all the only thing I love about me. You're the fire I need when my nuanced opinions get cold. I'm becoming proud of you & me<3
Jan 22
Jan 22, 2026 at 5:41 AM UTC
I've been writing my doubts with experiences most lonely nights. Have started over so many times. Wrinkled out my stories and tossed them to a flame.
If only I can go back to the ashes, recycling stories as if they sparked anyones interest. Should have counted my gratitudes back then, I might have been happier. Stayed awake all night counting my flaws like sheep. But burned my securities to a colder memory. Made everything sorry and tried to avoid hating out loud about me. If only I knew how to draw out the feelings I've felt. Wished I understood how everyone loves me.
Jan 13
Jan 13, 2026 at 5:20 AM UTC