Where was I?
I fell through the sky when they all thought chicken little cried wolf
Somewhere in a black hole sun
A coin stands on it's edge and things aren't what they seem
Bermuda Triangle violently exhaling anomalies
The air splits like a wound when propeller blades start spinning too fast
Eventually we all get ****** into this perfect storm
I hear it's a place where magicians perform
Pull me out of a hat and watch the universe unravel
My heart strings wound too tight
The world collapses like a lung
Where was I?
Always dwelling in ancient libraries
Deciphering unknown artifacts
There's foreign footprints in these catacombs
All these digital files and old photo albums
Analyze, evaluate, re-analyze
Question everything
Metamorphosis manifests
And the chameleon knows how to change it's scales
The world goes off balance when Atlas's shoulders get tired
Where was I
When the sirens sounded their alarm?
Have you seen the basements of my mind?
Charcoal smeared and cold dust
Cluttered and hazardous
Climb out the fire escapes in the thick hot heat of things
Underground bunkers at Hiroshima
Salem burning
There are witches under the house
These tornadoes don't rest
because the scarecrow has a stick up his ***
Where does the lion hide?
Where does the lion sleep when the jungle's on fire?
How does the tin man ****
Where was I?
Somewhere down the rabbit hole
Running out of time
That ferocious lunar grin
Meet me under the Cheshire moon
In that last lamp light
The toadstools tremble beneath our toes
Did you plant these mushroom clouds for us?
The mad hatter struck a match
and our house of cards is burning down
Why do my hands smell like gas?
I saw you catching ash on your tongue
I guess there's something beautiful in the way things burn
The roses are dripping red
and there's blood on my hands
The dream is gone when the queen cuts off
another head
Where was I?
Always digging tunnels in the ant farms of my mind
Dirt covers up old bodies
I leave them a rose
For paradises lost
For another lost soul
Another Eden gone to hell
Something slithered in the grass when the apple fell
Apocalypse now
But what is it about the way things disappear?
Where was I?
Where is here?
Apr 16, 2015
Apr 16, 2015 at 11:32 AM UTC
Cracked, callused, and crinkled;
Tiny canyons stretch across thick fingers like monuments,
When my scabs were small islands, his were continents.
When mine skipped stones, those hands moved mountains
And hardened the way things do against time.
Those hands held my mother’s before they ever held mine.
I knew the warm furnaces of love like the roof built over my head.
Mornings always smelled like coffee and scrambled eggs
Prepared with the patience of rocking a baby to sleep.
Fingers folding like a blanket beneath tucked feet
Hugs wrapped around me like band aids.
Splintered, split, stingy and torn,
Knuckles like bark off chopped wood,
Veins like thorny twine stretch across tough tree trunk wrists,
Those hands held the world up like a tree limb holds sacred fruit.
Always scratching the peel rough and raw, opening cuts like orange slices,
Nails like a rake scraping against burnt autumn leaves,
Those hands bled like sacrifice.
Stars glistening like sweat over late night conversations,
Summers spent in the driveway playing catch and taking slap shots,
Those pig skin hands always teaching me to shoot for my goals.
“If you’re not going to do it right, don’t do it at all.”
Things the cracks in the pavement taught me,
Practice and precision seen in life lines.
Dried up rivers stretch across worn desert palms,
Waves of weathered wrinkles rush against sandpaper skin.
Sawdust flesh caked with hurt, if I could take away the pain I would,
But I admire the slits in my own knuckles hoping I too will know
Diligence like the depths of my father’s canyons.
Apr 16, 2015
Apr 16, 2015 at 11:31 AM UTC
This is the part
where everything
changes.
This is the part
like an orchid
requires patience.
This is the part
where the universe
bends
¬ and you fold
the paper
into
flowers.
Cover me in chrysanthemums.
This is the part
where our knees become inch worms
under the table.
Cover me in dirt.
This is the part
that comes on slow at first
then
heavy
urgent
pulses
rush
through
us
adding
impulse
to
injury
manipulating
our insides
twisting
folding
contorting
every nerve
until they
RIP.
But the pieces don’t get rest.
This is the part
where the lions roar
like violets showing their teeth
at the sun.
They nibble the flesh
without breaking
the skin.
It’s paper thin.
This is the part
where I ball up my paper fists
and wrestle with the tiger lilies
while you remain at war with my tulips.
This is the part
where we dig up the dirt
and we ruin us.
This is the part
where the dandelions B U R S T
like supernovas
and suddenly
ev-er-y
syll-a-ble
counts.
You said
Everyone's b/ r/ o/ k/ e/ n in some way.
You said
when you were young
you saw the miracle of birth for the first time
and you've been turned on
ever since.
You saw life spring from the womb.
I think I saw you mesmerized by the way things bloom.
You tell me
about your birds and bees
like how getting your head rubbed
at the hair salon
turns you on.
Well, this is the part
where I rub your head
and turn you on.
This is the part
where I see your dark side
and learn the true meaning
of the blue in your eyes.
This is the part
where you flip me over
and tell me
"Don't stop."
I don't stop.
Why would I stop?
I can't
stop.
And
this
is
the
part
where
we
fall
A
p
a
r
t.
Tell me you don't want this.
Tell me you don't want this
and I'll leave this bed of marigold
and
change
my
form.
Tell me you don't want this
and I'll never hold your gaze
to¬o l o n g
again.
Tell me you don't want this
and I'll unfold myself from your side
along with the paper flowers.
You can take back the roses
**** the daises
but leave me the daffodils.
Tell me you don’t want this
and our forget-me-nots
will forget us
and our bleeding hearts
will bleed us dry.
Tell me you don't want this
and I'll rewind the movie
play it BACK
from the beginning
only this time
we'll pay
attention.
I'll silence the lions
and put them BACK in their cages.
I'll bend
the universe
BACK into
shape.
But tell me you want this
and this will be the part
where we pick the paper petals
off the
stem and
watch them
fall like
cherry blossoms.
He loves me.
He loves me not.
Forget me.
Forget me not.
Feb 20, 2015
Feb 20, 2015 at 1:55 PM UTC
I sleep
with the leftovers of our
dismemberment
My rib cage strewn across the covers
like an elephant graveyard
where a love
once lived.
I wake up
to the shivering clatter
of each
lonely
bone.
I dropped
all my **** this morning.
My cover up fell to the floor
and shattered.
I stared
at the broken pieces.
I dropped
my pen
my lighter
my defenses
These shaky hands
can't hold on
to anything,
So then why is it
my heart still can?
Feb 17, 2015
Feb 17, 2015 at 10:42 AM UTC
Our hearts
Are wild animals
Trying to break through
Their cages
Clawing
Grabbing
Biting
We're in too deep now
Please don't look away sweetheart.
Please
see
Me.
Please
Hold
Me.
Please
Let
Me
See
You.
Please
Let
Me
Hold
You.
Tell me darling
This won't destroy us.
Why don’t they put that on candy hearts?
Tell me darling
That everything will be all right.
Tell me darling
Have I frightened you?
Please
Don't
Go.
Can you hear me sweetheart?
Is the ink from this pen loud enough?
I just
Want something
Real.
Something that's mine.
No.
Something that's ours.
Can you give me that sweetheart?
Please
Don't
Reject
Me.
I don't need you to save me.
I don't need you to save me
From crashing
And burning.
I just need you to understand.
I just need you to understand
and accept
That I am capable
Of crashing
And burning.
I just need you
To be able to wrestle with
The flames
And to be able to resurrect me from
The ashes.
We breathe.
I pant.
I say
"I want you inside me."
You say
"I want to be inside you."
I'm nervous
But it's not my first time.
You find your place between my thighs
And lift me
Hold me
Carry me
To the bed
Still
Kissing
Still
Biting
Still
Clawing
Clinging
Scratching
Grabbing
Grasping
Gasping for air!
As the wild animal
Still
Rages
On.
Is this what romance
Feels like?
Is this what hope
Feels like?
This is new.
This is nice.
The candy hearts never told us
This will destroy us.
Ruin us.
But we need
To ruin
Us.
We need
To take
Us
Turn
Us
Reword
Us
Into something
we never were before.
Into something
We were meant to be.
I made your lip bleed.
Accidentally of course,
Always am I
A gentle spirit
That does things
Too hard
Feels too hard
Loves too hard
Too much
Too soon
Too fast
Too often
And I hope
You never have to remember me
By the taste of blood
In your mouth.
I hope
You never have to
Swallow glass.
I don't want to hurt you again.
I don't ever want to hurt you
But I want our rib cages
To be
Broken
And bruised
And busted through
And I mean that in the best of ways
Because the animal
Needs
To feed
To ****
To breathe
And I wonder darling
Will you need me?
Please
Need
Me.
Can you see me sweetheart?
Please
See
Me.
Are you scared yet sweetheart?
Have I frightened you?
Are the animal's teeth
Too sharp
Too hard
Too much
Too fast
Too soon
Too often?
Are you afraid yet sweetheart?
Can you see me yet?
Can
You
See
Me?
I say
"I want you inside me."
And the wild animal
Wants
Out.
Feb 17, 2015
Feb 17, 2015 at 10:39 AM UTC
We love like water
Coming together in waves
I feel you wash over me
And I'm scared you're just passing through.
I know there are other fish in the sea
But I like when you come to stay in my pond.
Maybe it's just a puddle.
It feels more like an ocean when your in it.
We're caught in a never ending hurricane
You and I
I can feel the sands of our time
Slipping through my grasp
But your hands feel like mine
When our fingers clasp
And our bodies intertwine.
We love like water
Washing up on a shore of another dream
Or sinking to the bottom of the sea
You were my anchor before you let me float away.
I wish you'd stay.
But we love like water
You go up in the clouds
And I come down like rain.
Aug 10, 2014
Aug 10, 2014 at 5:17 PM UTC
They arrived like giants
Stampeding over my fragile dreams
Like wild elephants on a glass floor.
I wanted to run
But I stayed.
I wanted to cry
But I dried up my well
And hid my wishes away.
They're all the change I have in me.
This broken heart's gone broke
But has the hope of a mouse who knows
There's cheese at the end of the maze
Just doesn't know a better way.
They arrived like giants
And the moon was oblong
I felt so small while you felt so strong
You said there's no reason to be depressed,
But babe I'm afraid.
I don't think those elephants
Will ever rest.
Aug 10, 2014
Aug 10, 2014 at 4:53 PM UTC
Every day
I am taunted by the sun
For I know I can reach for its warmth
and feel its tantalizing heat
but I cannot touch
its flame.
Every night
I am comforted by the moon
For I know its luminosity is great
But its loneliness and mine
Feel one in the same.
Ever since
You made me look up at the sky
And told me we still had the stars
I've loved those constellations
But I cannot give them
A name.
Aug 5, 2014
Aug 5, 2014 at 3:05 AM UTC
Most days
Im trying so hard to stay afloat
That for a moment
I was so tired
I finally chose
To drown
And it felt more like
Flying.
Now it feels more like
Falling.
Again
And again
And again
In these endless dead end cycles
Because my heart refuses
To abide by my head.
Most days
I'm so numb
That for a moment
I finally chose to feel
Letting bliss flood my lungs
Along with the pain.
I took a deep breath of it
And I went
Under.
Jul 18, 2014
Jul 18, 2014 at 3:03 PM UTC
I must have been the captain of our relation
Because I'm the one going down with the ship
Sails were set high in the wind
Only for the boat to flip
The waves got rocky and the skies grew dark
When you suddenly went overboard and became a shark
At least the waters cleansing as it swallows me down
And I hold you in my heart as a lovely way to drown
Jul 10, 2014
Jul 10, 2014 at 11:08 AM UTC