My mind is falling into pieces
Into small strands of string
Floating away into the wind
It is so hard to make sense of things
My mind is always on it
My issue, my problem
I want help
But am so scared
What will they think of me?
Will they tell me it’s all fake?
That this feeling inside of me that I am meant for something more
More than this world can offer me
Is wrong?
I want my stories to be real
I want to have magical abilities
I want this all to be a dream and that I will wake up tomorrow
If I do get help
What will they think of me?
Will they feel betrayed?
These characters I have created
Will they leave me for someone more reliable?
What if I let it all go?
All these stories, these creations
Will they leave me cold and helpless?
I’ve worked so hard to become the person that I am
If I just let it go,
Will it die away?
Will I die away?
Nov 1, 2017
Nov 1, 2017 at 1:32 AM UTC
I might be going crazy
This world is going in a circle
Tip tap
See that man over there?
Top tip
He has superpowers
He can fly to the moon
Ring-a-round the rosie
When I was younger
Quack queek
I went to ninja school
A pocket full of posies
That woman on the street
La lo
Is a witch with potions
I had one once
It made me see
Ashes ashes
What’s that falling from the sky?
Sap sop
Is it coming from outer space?
Of course it is!
It is a message from the aliens!
We all fall down
I swear I am not going crazy
Beep bop
I am just
Bop beep
A person
Maybe
Tip tap
You are going
Tap tip
crazy too
May 30, 2017
May 30, 2017 at 12:52 AM UTC
Once in my life I wanna be me
I want to stop listening to people's judgements
I want to stop comparing myself to others
I want to stop being like other people
But I can't...
It's like this universe wants me to be like everyone else
People look at me in odd ways when I wear my favorite shirt
They judge my overgrown hair
They laugh at my make-up free face
But the thing is
I like that old shirt that has a burrito on it
My hair is what makes me, me
I don't like make-up
But why do I have to be like everyone else
Why must I constrict my freedom to someone's liking
Just because they say I wouldn't "fit in" if I don't
Maybe it has something to with me
Maybe I just need the confidence to
Jump up and scream
"Hey, I can be different!"
It is going to be difficult to do that
To leave my little bubble
But what if I do leave the bubble,
Does that mean I can be who I wanna be?
May 27, 2016
May 27, 2016 at 12:23 AM UTC
These demons that live inside of me
The voices that create these things
These nightmares
The things that keep me up at night
The thing that's makes me scream and shout
I see people
I talk to people
I walk with them everyday
But yet, I couldn't be more lonely
It troubles me that I can't talk
I can't say a word that goes on inside of my heart
Inside my heart it's a scary place
There hides a demon
Two if you must
And they wither and they fight
If I tell
These demons will surely know
They will make me feel so much pain
Why could I tell?
People won't understand
They will call me crazy
They say it's a stage that I'm going through
But why has it been going on for years?
I have been asking the same thing for years
Maybe it's because I can't let it go
This pain that shrivels inside of me
It's what comforts me at night
The tears that fall
It is wiped away by these demons
If I am lonely
They come
Wrapping their invisible arms around me
Holding my helpless hand
I scream
Why can't they leave me alone?
These demons
They are always there
Clouding my thoughts, my judgements
I say it's my conscience
But is it?
My friends can tell something is wrong
They ask me if I am okay
I say I'm fine, just tired
I do smile sometimes
I even laugh
And that laugh and smile is true
It's true because its keeping the demons away
But then soon I am alone
And my laughter dies down
My smile fades
The demons walk back in
And they whisper, did you miss me?
Then I realize something that I have known for a while
I am lost
I am helpless
And the only thing that truly comforts me
Are my demons inside of me
May 24, 2016
May 24, 2016 at 10:57 PM UTC
There is this thing inside of me
It throws insults around
Thinking I would catch them
But instead I drop them
It laughs at me
Especially when I do something stupid
It never lets anything slide
This thing inside of me
It never leaves my side
Not even when I get down on my knees
And I beg till my cheeks are shining red
I want it to go
I want it to leave me and never turn back
But something inside is keeping it here
Because at times
When the day is at the darkest of hours
And everyone seems to be asleep
This thing decides to make an appearance
And it almost seems like this thing
Wipes away my tears
And it picks me up when my body fails
This thing inside of me may laugh
It may insult
It may never leave
But the idea about it is that
It never leaves
Even when everyone has turned their backs
This thing may have never mentioned its name
But to me
This thing is my enemy and my friend
This thing is...
Me
May 24, 2016
May 24, 2016 at 10:48 PM UTC